Jennifer Howe, Author at Facets of Faith

A Weary World Rejoices: Pondering and Remembering

12.23.2020 by Jennifer Howe //

Hello, friends! It’s the final share of 2020, and we’re excited to reintroduce our lovely friend, Hyacynth. She’s blessed us with her words before, but you may find this topic very real: a weary world rejoices. That’s much of this year for everyone, we know. Our team hopes to encourage you with words to meet your heart where it is, if it is, in the weariness. Quiet pondering. This idea is nothing less than sweet and encouraging to the soul in the busy, harsh environment some of us endure. Add your thoughts in the comments below, share, or visit the Facebook Page.

Merry Christmas, friends! We love you, and we hope you are blessed in this Christmas week.

During a normal December, there is much noise to navigate, and this December 2020 I (Hyacynth) recognize my need for noise reduction more than in years past. My spirit is weary, and it cannot take any more self-help plans or spiritual revitalization how-tos or sermons about how I can fix the weariness that has settled over me this year. I don’t want to add to the noise for you either, and so I will be brief in sharing what I’m learning this year about rejoicing in the midst of a wearing year like 2020.

Maybe you’ve asked yourself the same questions I’ve thought about this Advent season: what if I don’t feel like rejoicing amid the weariness that’s stretched out over my heart, my body, and my spirit? What if a celebration isn’t something I can muster right now?

When Jesus was born, there was quite an exclamation mark lingering around his birth and dedication — the Star, the angels, the heavenly hosts, the shepherds coming to rejoice in the birth of the savior. There was much rejoicing in a loud joyous way.

This year, one marked with weariness, my heart in this moment doesn’t quite resonate with the shepherds’ reaction; it lingers with Mary in her response amid the great exclamations of joy.

“All who heard the shepherds’ story were astonished, but Mary kept all these things in her heart and thought about them often.” Luke‬ ‭2:18-19‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Mary pondered these thoughts, these circumstances, these joy-filled reactions in her heart; Mary doesn’t cry out in loud celebration. Her celebration is quiet—a marveling as she ponders. Some translations say she treasured these things in her heart—a young mother picking up gemstones of remembrance as events unfolded in front of her eyes, gathering them together in a collection of marvelous unfoldings.

As I reflect on Mary’s posture, I’ve come to believe Mary’s ponderings were part of her rejoicing. Rejoicing comes at the deliverance of the promise of very good news comes true. To really be able to rejoice, we first must deeply understand what is happening, which requires time to process. And then we must remember and linger long over the promises of God manifesting before our eyes. Maybe tour first response isn’t always a loud celebration or tears of joy. Maybe part of rejoicing first comes in the quiet ponderings of the heart, as we remember what God has said and realize God has done what He said He would do.

Maybe the precursor to rejoicing is first processing and then remembering. And maybe remembering requires us to ponder in the quiet of moments during the day and amid the silence of dark nights. Maybe rejoicing cannot be mustered up or turned on and off like Christmas tree lights. Maybe rejoicing needs time to linger in the wonder of it all. Maybe the prelude of rejoicing in a weary world is to first ponder and remember and wonder at Gods goodness and faithfulness in quiet cover of darkness. And then, it time, like a seed buried below ground, shoots of joy will spring forth from the soul rejoicing amid a weary land.

Do not fear if your rejoicing begins in the darkness. Settle there in quiet ponderings of remembering His faithfulness; a shoot of hope and cry of joy will be born from pondering His goodness in the hushed darkness just below the surface. In time the seed will spring forth glorious praise.

A Weary World Needs Relationship to Rejoice

12.09.2020 by Jennifer Howe //

Hey, friend! Welcome to FACETS. We hope you’ll be blessed by our shares this month. We’re thinking about how a weary world can rejoice…

As I (Jennifer) sit to write this post, it’s November—very early for me to be writing a post, honestly. I like to wait on my FACETS work because I hope to be in step with what’s happening in the world while keeping in step with the Spirit. But, back to the chompin’-at-the-bit early thing: that has been the gist of the end of this year for me and many friends. Are we all trying to escort 2020 out the door as fast as we can? It’s been a rough year, hasn’t it? Maybe you’re weary…maybe the world is.

The weary world rejoices…

This month’s topic came directly from lyrics you might know. This year, I feel the songwriter’s attuned pen in my life. 2020 has felt—heavy. I never expected to watch the entire year float away. Everyone I know has commented on being socially distant and fractured, financially pressed and depressed, and internally restless and stressed. It’s hard to ignore that disease, disorder, and death (of people’s lives and dreams) are heavy on me, you, the world.

Rejoicing?

You gotta be kiddin’ me! I sat down to write, and my heart wanted to say those words with a bit of snark. I had no idea what to say to the mom trying to work a full-time job and homeschool her children in absence of the support she needs. I wasn’t sure I could genuinely encourage the woman who’s been out of work in 2020 for more months than she’s worked. If the gifts are the highlight of the season in a person’s heart, this might be some polar train heading for derailment. How do we even get into the mood to rejoice? In my area, so many things are shut down. And lots of people’s wallets shut down this year, too.

Painfully real

Can I be real? I struggle in the holiday season some years, and this year is not only no exception but also exceptionally challenging. My introverted self has over-charged. If I’ve learned anything, I know I desperately n-ee-ee-ee-eed people! As an over-thinker, I rely on others to connect deeply and interrupt my little echo chamber with fresh truth, love, grace, and humor. That’s much better than self-talk in my outside voice. My Labradors and rabbits think I’m talking to them, but—ummm, no. Neighbors may be concerned? And I’ve just got to laugh at someone else’s quick wit—on the outside!

I’m weary. Loneliness appeared as a tiny crack in March, but it’s widened to canyon proportions. Not having regular work has been sad for me and my friends. The disconnection from people is hard. Conversations are infrequent, and I feel an awkward “drive-thru connection” mentality developing.

“Hi, how are you?”
“I’m okay—except for the million things going wrong this month…
“I’m sorry it’s so hard.” (My stuff is nothing.)
“I’ve got to go. Thanks for listening!”
“Sure. I’ll pray for you—” (Awww, I feel with her!)

Some of us carry others’ loads in a way that deeply affects us. More than we might say. Without regular connection and time to process pain, a fast conversation can be too heavy. We can’t (and shouldn’t try) to fix others’ troubles. Our pain and others’ pain—it’s painfully real. What do we do?

Be real

Mental pain is less dramatic than physical pain, but it is more common and also more hard to bear. The frequent attempt to conceal mental pain increases the burden: it is easier to say “My tooth is aching” than to say “My heart is broken.” ― C.S. Lewis, The Problem of Pain

Lewis nails it. I learned something new about extremes this year. I might keep silent.

I was mute and silent;
I held my peace to no avail,
and my distress grew worse. Psalm 39:2

Or I might admit there’s trouble, sharing all the details.

“Oh that my words were written!
Oh that they were inscribed in a book! Job 19:23

And some days’ trouble could fill a book!

The second looks like processing, but I still miss it: the faith-filled, introspective look; the safety and love in honest relationship to God, myself, and safe others; and the peace that comes from the nearness of God.

Can I admit my heart is broken? Can I genuinely share the road I’m walking is terribly lonely, and I can’t bear it? Concealing pain is a wrong move for me. I hamster-wheel the events, problems, and my solutions (Read: problem-solving echo chamber). I know God’s and others’ wisdom should be welcome!

Share the weary

This is the importance of God and safe people in everyday life. Humans simply must connect deeply; we were made for that. Deep, vulnerable sharing isn’t for every relationship, and it’s not for the shallow, hurried, too-short conversation in passing. It is for a select few, safe relationships. I believe my Heavenly Father loves me (and you!), and He wants faith-filled people to lovingly choose to walk through the best, worst, and wonky stuff in life.

Walking through the weary

How do we do it? Let’s try some of this:

* Realize my mind and heart need calibration with absolute truth.
* Be honest with God, myself, and a few safe people.
* Trust God with all my raw emotions and troubles.
* Trust an equipped, faith-filled, safe person with the raw emotions.
* Resist “drive-thru” connection.
* Participate in relationships as both a giver and receiver.
* Be available for others as a faith-filled giver.

I love that pain and weariness shared is a lighter load, when it’s done right.

A weary world can rejoice!

The Father sent Jesus in order to resolve our biggest pain and trouble—the problem of sin and death.

O holy night, the stars are brightly shining
It is the night of our dear Savior’s birth.
Long lay the world in sin and error pining,
Till he appeared and the soul felt its worth.

The gift of the Savior—you and I can rejoice over His advent! You are, and I am, that valuable!

And then He created a community of people who would walk through this temporary, wearying experience together, loving Him and loving others well.

Truly He taught us to love one another
His law is love and His gospel is peace
Chains He shall break
For the slave is our brother
And in His Name
All oppression shall cease
Sweet hymns of joy
In grateful chorus raise we
Let all within us praise His holy Name

Why can I choose to rejoice? King David reminds me—

I will rejoice and be glad in your steadfast love,
because you have seen my affliction;
you have known the distress of my soul, Psalm 31:7

He knows our hearts and minds. He knows the amazing and the awful in our lives. We can trust Him with disease, disorder, and distress. Thank you, God!

The thrill of hope, the weary world rejoices,
For yonder breaks a new and glorious morn.
Fall on your knees,
Oh, hear the angel voices
O night divine,
O night when Christ was born
O night divine,
O night, O night divine

Closing out 2020 and going forward

At the close of this very hard year would you care to join me as I soak in this? Choose to make it your own, if you like.

I am not alone because Jesus, Immanuel, is “God with us” and chose to come for me. I have a Savior in Jesus and a Weariness Warrior in His Holy Spirit. There is the “thrill of hope” in just that!

I will be gut-level honest with God, myself, and a few safe people. I have to choose to lean in, but it will be worth it! Loads will be lightened.

I commit to faithfulness in my relationship with God, first; complete honesty and gentleness with myself; and full and genuine participation in relationships as a giver and a receiver.

It’s a manifesto, I suppose. This is how I will address the weariness in my world and how I’ll support others in theirs!

How are you handling your weary world? How can I help? Who will you help? Pop a comment below or at our Facebook page. Don’t forget—sharing is caring. Who else might be encouraged by FACETS of faith?

2020: Thankfulness and Managing Disappointment in a Socially Distant Holiday World

11.10.2020 by Jennifer Howe //

Hey, friend, welcome to FACETS. This month the question is: Who burnt my turkey? We’re thinking about what to do when we can’t gather. Our lives have been socially distant. Most of us never dreamed this could permeate all of 2020. Surely we’d have the holidays! And yet, we all wait to see what this Thanksgiving will look like. Each FACET and our guest will be sharing perspectives this month. We hope you’ll check them out!

It’s been a long haul…

I (Jennifer) can’t believe it’s November. No-vem-ber-r-r-r-r!

In my part of the States, we’ve been socially distant since before my birthday in March. A ray of hope appeared when restaurants opened in summer. But then they closed again. What do we do when our hearts and minds are spellbound by terms we’ve never know before: mitigation, phases, testing numbers, case numbers, vaccine trials, and (tragically) death toll? It’s 2020, y’all. Enough said?

Thanks for the memories!

My mind drifts to the turkey days of the past. The bird was golden brown and juicy some years, a bit dry other years. The sweet potato-apple-marshmallow thing happened. Our family warred over whether you could actually have Thanksgiving dinner without the gelatinous cranberry log. I was extra thankful the year my sister made real cranberries—like, with real berries!

Probably my favorite Thanksgiving Day memory was a “Mom – 1; Daughter – 0” moment. A sister breezed through the kitchen several times, taking sips of my mom’s soda. Mom got creative with a little black olive juice over ice. Looked just like the brown soda without bubbles. We all waited. The next sip was surprising and pretty dramatic. Mom, you nailed it! Hilarious!

But this is 2020…

We don’t know what restrictions will be in place in a couple weeks, but so many conversations with friends are doubtful about the freedom to gather. Even if we could, not everyone feels safe to gather. They can’t risk it for themselves or their loved ones. I get it. And I’m sad. This whole thing is a conundrum. I start to wonder who the heck charred my Thanksgiving turkey before I even got to think about gathering to enjoy it!

Will there be disappointment?

There will be. If any family members do gather, there will be “holes” in every family. It doesn’t matter why the people aren’t there. It might be small reasons or really, really hard ones. We just know this isn’t the thing we hoped for or even wanted. We really wanted a juicy Butterball and a full table. Instead, 2020 might continue to look like the dumpster fire it’s been for nearly 9 months.

In my mind I can imagine a big, ol’ turkey-shaped charcoal briquette on a plate sitting at the head of an empty table. It might be like that. Or it might not.

What do we do?

As I have experienced, I (we) have options in the face of potential or actual disappointment. Remember: potential means “not yet,” and that’s really important. Reality is our actual experience, in the moment, and we embrace and respond to it. I might be talking to myself. I need to hear this as much as anyone! Are you with me?

I thought we might walk together through some steps to calibrating reality.

Step One

Don’t be confused about what might happen and what is actually happening. I can be filled with fear or unnaturally heavy emotion before I know it if I focus on a possible future that isn’t reality yet. I lean into answering questions when I need to remind myself of my reality.

What can I see?
What can I hear?
What can I feel?
What can I taste?
Where are my feet right now?
What is above me, below me, to my right and left?
What time of day is it?

What’s the point? This process reminds me of where I am in space and time. It’s a good way to do a check in with my physical body in my immediate reality.

Step Two

Once we’re self-aware in our natural surroundings, we might move to what I think is most important: the truth that is super-natural. Things that really matter transcend the temporary. You see, the current “reality” actually is temporary. And there is truth beyond most of the usual thinking.

Heaven and earth will pass away, but my words will not pass away. Luke 21:33

It helps to know the immutable truth I’m looking for is found on the pages of my Bible. I know I can always read the words (in context!) and know God’s heart and mind on a matter, as long has He hasn’t been silent on the matter.

So the big questions are:

What does Scripture say about me?
What does He say about the future?
What do His words say? What do they mean? How should I live having read them?

The beauty of Step Two is that I am reminded of my true identity, the one God created in my birth; shaped through people, places, and events; redeemed through Jesus’ death at the cross, and is restoring every day by the power of His Spirit. That’s truth that shapes a big, bold eternal reality!

Step Three

Love the opportunities you have! This is tough for me sometimes. I can be short-sighted and miss the amazing moments God has gifted to me in the right-here-and-now. In my world it looks like this:

I think of someone I love. I don’t send the text.
“Oooh, I should call her. I’ll do that.” I never dial.
My friend is isolating/insulating/in a shame cycle. I don’t connect.
I say I’ll pray…later. I forget.

There definitely are golden opportunities in 2020. Even with all of the restrictions, we can be creative to close the relational distance!

I CAN meet with friends and family in the way they are comfortable.
I CAN use tech if I can’t meet face to face.
I CAN call more than once in a blue moon.
I CAN choose to connect in some personal way when I can’t travel.
I CAN let her know I’m thinking about her if I can’t offer a hug.
I CAN try to help her smile, even if I can’t see a smile behind her mask.
I CAN pray for her right now.
I CAN be open to new friends, the “family I choose,” in 2020.
I CAN stop seeing people as problems, obstacles, strangers, or enemies.
I CAN start seeing people as amazing masterpieces created by the hand of God.

What’s funny about Step Three is that it gets me out of my head (where disappointment and depression want live rent-free), out of my own echo chamber (where the messages on repeat might not be helpful), and into the lives of others (where relationship really happens!).

What if we can’t gather for Thanksgiving?

The honest truth is, we might not. Or some of us might not. This year might look different from any other. It might be challenging, but we certainly CAN be creative.

When the day arrives, it might start to feel like a charcoal turkey. Thankfulness might be MIA. If sadness is your temporary reality, acknowledge that. Then start with Step One and move through Steps Two and Three.

Thankfulness is directly connected to the will to be thankful! I have a running “I Spy…” list in my journal. Each month the list of things I’m grateful for is longer than the last. I see the grace of God in coffee, conversations, sunshine through clouds, bunnies, and Labradors. On Thanksgiving day I expect to be thankful for family and friends, present or not, and all the grace God has lavished on me.

All that said, I came across a laugh-out-loud funny meme. If we all get desperate to gather, maybe this?

Six allowed at Thanksgiving but 30 for a funeral. I will be holding a funeral for my pet turkey that will pass away on November 26th. Refreshments provided.

We need to laugh in 2020.

Thanks for hanging in with a behomoth-sized post. Be sure to check out Facets of Faith on Facebook! And as always, I’m honored when you care to share your thoughts, share this blog, or share a prayer request.