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How Does Prayer Fuel Our Hope?

07.03.2018 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome, friends! This month FACETS of Faith is talking about one of my favorite spiritual topics─prayer. But before you get some picture of stuffy, formal displays, scrub that imagery from your brain. That’s not at all where God led me on this month’s writing journey. I can’t help but think God is going to bring people in need of hope to our posts this month. Know that you are getting prayed for by our team. We pray you have hope as an anchor that helps you hang on. We pray you have hope for today, tomorrow, and your future. We pray you have hope for  yourself, your family, and your friends. We pray that, even in hard seasons of life (and especially if you are in one RIGHT NOW) you are able to feel the love and hope of Christ alive in your heart.

My first house was a cute Cape Cod in a small lakefront community. I loved the place! Cute as a bug! (Ladybugs are cute, right?) Anyhow, it sat perched high on a hill overlooking the lake.  It was adorable. Fenced yard, a huge deck to take in all the water views, my first home a little slice of heaven. Except.

Except that one neighbor. You know the one (especially if you are familiar with unincorporated living). He never took care of a thing! His home sat disheveled as his lack of care and concern for his property diminished the value of everyone else’s. He was a nice guy. He just didn’t pay attention to what he had and how his lack of upkeep negatively impacted everyone else in the neighborhood.

Thankfully, I had a buffer. One home sandwiched between mine and the neighborhood eyesore. It got so bad at one point that my next door neighbors, the ones who took exemplary care of their yard, were forced to plant huge lilac bushes to block the sight of junk piling up in the backyard. Before long the neighbor whose property was diminishing returns for everyone else’s home values ran out of room in his back yard.

His neglect was smack dab in the front yard for all the world to see.

His boat and trailer sat front and center for years. Not sure how many. Enough to start growing weeds inside. Not quite the flowerbed you’d see on HGTV giving that home curb appeal.  Nope!  More like, more clutter and visual chaos than the eye can easily consume. His grime-covered boat with wild flowers (aka weeds) growing out of it sat so long on his driveway that it sank into the asphalt and would one day require a tow truck with a lot of torque to remove it once the “red tag committee” got involved.

That boat and trailer sat. Years. No love. No care. No fuel. Only neglect.

We can be like that sometimes.

We can have a shiny, new boat sitting in our driveway. However, without taking care of it, the boat loses its luster. Without adding fuel, we go nowhere. Fast. We need fuel to get where we’re going. How can we get anywhere on empty? Over time, without fuel our boat and trailer sink into the inky asphalt. Tires go flat, melting in the warm sun, becoming one with the driveway. Before we know it, there are well-worn ruts from the weight of the boat. Sinking. Sinking. A slow sink, unseen to the naked eye on day one, day two, day twenty. But before long, people begin to notice, even if we don’t.

“I wonder what’s going on at the neighbor’s house. Things are looking pretty shabby over there.”

Condemned houses don’t start out that way. Somewhere along the way someone just stopped caring. Perhaps, the people living inside lost hope. Life can get hard. Sometimes when life gets hard we curl into a ball, hide inside our houses, and don’t come out much. We think staying inside where the world can’t see us, and we can’t see it, will somehow make our situation better. But it doesn’t. It get’s harder. Lonelier. More isolated. Right where the devil wants us. He may even fertilize our futility.

“You don’t need them anyhow. You’re better off by yourself. No one will hurt you ever again. Just stay right here, locked in this cage that you think is freedom. Keep thinking that way.”

Weeds grow up entangling our hearts in hopelessness.

Heartbreaking to watch. We all need someone! All of us! We try to hide, but we can’t really. People eventually see what we think is a secret. People notice our neglect. The weeds that people once thought might be wild flowers are seen for what they are. Weeds.

One weed turns to two turns to ten. Condemned. Because, again, that’s right where the devil wants us.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. Through sadness and despair we can see hope peering through the far off distance if we squint our eyes and look through the haze of hard things. Like a star to the naked eye. We know it’s there, fuzzy, distant, but it’s not false. It really does exist.

Hope really does exist!

I’ve seen people hide under a blanket of futility. It’s hard to watch. So hard! As I see them sinking, I want to impart every ounce of wisdom-infused, hope-filled message God has ever delivered to me. He’s certainly pulled me out of several ruts I was sinking into over my lifetime. I want to say, “See? Look where I’m standing! I didn’t think it was possible. Hang on! Have hope! Keep going! You’ll get there!”

God’s love, grace and mercy infuse hope. Like an IV drip, He gives much-needed nourishment.

How, you ask?

How did He give me hope?

Prayer.

How does He give me hope?

Prayer.

Whether for me or for someone I care for, prayer gives me hope.  It helps me hang on.

I’ve grown to love prayer so much! It’s my lifeline. It also helps me to be a lifeline for others, not in some unhealthy, co-dependent way. Rather, healthy helping.

When I’m praying, God will put someone on my heart (basically bring them to my mind), so I know that’s who He wants me to pray for that day. Often, I’ll quietly ask in my head, “How should I pray?” And then I get a sense of what God wants me to pray for that person and the situation they’re in. You see, I used to want to fix it for people, to solve all the world’s problems and to wear the weight of that all by myself. (Even before I was a believer, I wanted to help people.) But helping people in dire need of hope is just flat-out too hard, too much to carry without Christ. We can’t! We can’t fix the world. We can’t even fix our own little world, the one that sometimes turns upside down in each of our lives.

Nope.

But we don’t have to. It’s not how God designed things.

He desires to help us! He desires to give us hope!

How do I know?

Time and time again He’s demonstrated it to me. All along He was, I just didn’t hear Him in my younger days. I tuned Him out. Tone deaf. But once I started having conversations with Him, for that’s what prayer is, a conversation with God, I have been astounded at how much He has to say about me, about life, about big things and little.

I’ve been blown away at His sweetness, His sensitivity to me and my heart. And He’s helped me to not only hang onto hope for myself, but for others. I’d venture to say that’s almost harder.  Hope for others.  You see, I know what’s in my brain. I know where I’ve been and I have a sense of my own struggles (even if I don’t always fully understand them). With others I pray for, I can’t see inside their heads. I don’t REALLY know what’s in their heart.  People can be a mystery. People can be misunderstood.

But with prayer, I hear things on their behalf. God can (and does) reassure me. He helps me have hope for others who don’t have it for themselves. Through prayer, God will help me to know what’s next, not every step to get to the final destination, but what’s next.

Without prayer which fosters a deep, intimate relationship with Christ, how do we not give in to the futility the enemy wants to shackle us in? “Sink lower, deeper. Deeper still. And let your lack of care and concern start to contaminate everyone around you.” We know darned well the enemy wants to wreak havoc in every relationship. It’s his specialty, and one of the areas he is at his sneakiest, twisting and distorting truth to hinder any sense of healthy relationships with others.

Prayer gives us hope in those scenarios too.

Changing of hearts doesn’t happen through what I say or even what I do. God may give me an assignment in a situation, but the miracle-working power of transformation only happens when someone allows God to change their heart. Our prayers are spiritual fuel to change hearts. My energy is best spent praying on others’ behalf.

Prayer is also our spiritual buffer, protecting us from absorbing other people’s problems in an unhealthy fashion. Prayer is for our protection, so we can help without hurting others or ourselves in the process.

Something that gives me unbelievable hope is how I’ve seen God answer my prayers. Countless answers. I trust Him. I trust He hears me. I trust He loves me. And I hope you do too. Better than that, I pray you do!

And remember what can happen in unincorporated areas. Weeds grow. Sinking into ruts. Condemned. Instead, let Christ live in your heart.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

If you would like Christ to live in your heart, pray this prayer.

Jesus, I don’t really understand all that it means to let You live in my heart, but I do know I need Your help! I need Your hope! So I surrender my heart and my life to You. I will grow to know You over time, and I thank You that You will help me to learn how to hear Your voice. Show me through prayer and through others how to experience You, Your love for me, and Your love for others. Help me to follow You forever and to embrace all that You have to show me, to teach me, and to heal within me. Instead of sinking deep in despair, help me to sink deep in Your love! Thank You for your gentleness. I pray You show me how gentle and loving You are, like nothing I’ve ever experienced before. Thank You, Jesus, for living in my heart from this day forward, forever and ever. In Jesus’ name, amen!

Signature Image: Tracy Stella

Categories // Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // Co-Dependence, Futility, hope, Isolation, Neglect, prayer

What do you do for fun?

06.05.2018 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome to Facets of Faith. This month we want you to dive deep with us into fun. Our prayer is you take time to explore what fun looks like to you. We hope you’re inspired to try one or two of the things we love. Look for Jennifer’s and Kim’s posts later this month to get a few more ideas to help you find your fun.

What Do You Do for Fun? (T. Stella)

Feel that? It’s sunshine warming after winter’s thaw. I (Tracy) turn my face toward the sky like a flower in search of photosynthesis-producing rays. I want to soak it all in, like life.  There’s much to see. There’s much to feel. There’s much to experience. If we are going to encounter difficulty, and we will, it’s imperative we are intentional about finding fun. We all need joy. We all need laughter. We all need those things which are good for our soul.

Toes touching sand cooled by the ocean’s waves and the smell of sea salt air to fill our lungs.  Stress strips away as frothy water laps on shore before it retreats into the ocean.  The beach has always been one of my happy places that fills my soul. At one point in life, I wanted to quit my job and operate a catamaran in the Caribbean, transporting tourists to interesting destinations. (It’s true.) I think the only thing that stopped me was knowing I needed to be responsible for my son’s sake. My previously impulsive nature harnessed, because I had someone who needed more stability and structure than that lifestyle would have allowed.

That desire does speak to a part of me which hasn’t changed even though decades have elapsed since then: it’s my spirit of adventure. Adventure is what intrigued me about the idea of running a catamaran tour in the turquoise waters with palm trees waving me toward the islands. Imagine the people I’d meet. Imagine the sights I’d see. Imagine the pace at which I’d live life – not go, go, go. Rather, go a little and enjoy life while you’re getting to where you’re going.

I do a lot more of that now. I’ll run fast and hard sometimes, but I’ll feel the need to slow down and have fun. When I feel the need, I give myself permission to have fun. Take a break.

In various seasons of life I’ve even scheduled fun into my calendar (which doesn’t sound all that fun when you like to be spontaneous like I do, BUT it’s better than the alternative of not getting in some good times while we’re going). Sometimes, we need to be intentional with our fun finding.

My idea of fun looks different that it used to in many ways. God continues to align my heart with His, purifying my desires. It’s true what Scripture says: God gives us the desires of our heart. (See Psalm 37:4) Not every wish and dream and fancy. More like, “Let me show you something I know you will love.” He puts a pure desire in our heart and then shows us how good it can be and how very much it will bless us. God is generous in His goodness. If you don’t know that already, I pray you get to know Him─really get to know Him─and His goodness.

Yes, we are to honor God. We are to worship Him. We are to do what is right and holy and good in His eyes. But what if we ARE honoring Him and worshipping Him by enjoying the good gifts He gives us. I suggest to you that is exactly the case. Having fun is a form of worship. The Lord loves to see us delight in the good gifts He gives. When we enjoy Him, His presence, and His gifts we are giving back to God.

Every time we say, “Thank You, Lord, for Your goodness”, we show Him that we don’t take Him or His gifts for granted.

What do we really have to give God that He hasn’t already given us first? Not money. It’s His in the first place. Not love. We only love because He first loved us. (See 1 John 4:19) I am not suggesting we don’t give God our money or that we don’t give God our love. Of course, we do! I’m just saying we only are ABLE to give them because He gave them to us first.

We can, however, express our heartfelt gratitude to Him for His goodness.  We can give Him that gift. When He’s generous with us, we should thank Him. And when we’re looking and paying attention, we’ll notice how lavish His generosity is in our lives. That certainly has been my experience.

On your feet now─applaud God!

   Bring a gift of laughter,

   sing yourselves into his presence.

 Know this: God is God, and God, God.

   He made us. We didn’t make him.

   We’re his people, his well-tended sheep.

 Enter with the password: “Thank you!”

   Make yourselves at home, talking praise.

   Thank him. Worship him.

 For God is sheer beauty,

   all-generous in love,

   loyal always and ever.

 ─Psalm 100 The Message

When I’m having fun, you’ll hear me laugh (perhaps from miles away … my laugh is pretty loud!).  Our laughter is a gift to God. We can wrap it up in all its splendor and give it to Him as a gift for all His glorious goodness. He is so generous toward us; we should be generous to Him in return. Laugh. Laugh a lot! You will be giving your Father great joy.

We enter His presence with the password “Thank you!” I love that! We have a not-so-secret password to usher us into God’s presence. Thank You! In God’s presence is where we will find fun. He shines His light on the path He wants to lead us along. He is not a slave-driving task master. He’s a lavish, love-giving God who delights in sharing His goodness with us. And since He made us, He knows what will bless us. He knows that far better than even we know it ourselves.

My husband and I just returned from vacation. I like exploring, taking in fresh sights and experiencing new adventures. And if you even try to take me to a chain restaurant, especially on vacation, just ask my husband how much I’ll stubbornly stomp my feet in revolt! He now knows better than to suggest such an outlandish idea … if he wants to have an enjoyable vacation.  He’s learned a thing or two about his wife over the years.  (giggle) No chain restaurants will keep her happy. And happy is a good head start to having fun!

This year we did something new for vacation. We drove down to Branson, MO. Our primary objective was to take our motorcycles and go exploring down winding roads that would definitely qualify for “the road less travelled”.

Often, we were the only two on the road. For miles and miles.  At times, the road conditions were technical in nature.  That’ll get your adrenaline going! I can’t lie. At first, I was a little nervous rounding all the curves and navigating all the ups and downs of the terrain. Not knowing what’s ahead can be scary. True in life as well. But we keep going. We stretch. We grow. We go slow … until we can accelerate and our muscles ease as we relax into the unknown, open road.  It’s far easier to navigate the turns when we’re not tense. Every once in awhile there’s gravel to look out for, but as long as we see it and can make adjustments we’re still in for a fun-filled day without risking a crash.

My eyes absorbed nature’s hues as my engine hummed. I wished I could blink my eyes and take a snapshot of all the beautiful scenery as we went. Some of the views were absolutely spectacular and I was wishing for a way to help me remember them all. If I looked long and hard enough perhaps they’d permanently etch upon my mind.

God knows I love nature. And God knows I love new things. He knew I’d love this trip! But He needed to start preparation a year ahead. You see, I only learned how to ride a motorcycle last year. While we were on vacation, a Facebook timeline memory came up from the previous year of me learning to ride a small cycle in a church yard. I had just learned how to shift the bike into second gear. It felt exhilarating and a little terrifying, because I didn’t want to crash into anything. When I managed to successfully shift into 2nd gear, I shouted “I did it! I did it!” laughing all the while.

Because God had prepared me for our trip to Branson a year in advance with over 4,000 miles underneath my belt, I was able to settle into a new experience with Him and have a lot of fun while doing so.

Maybe your fun will require some advance preparation too.  Any future marathon runners out there?

While we traversed the Missouri roads together, I couldn’t quit thanking God for His goodness and for the beauty of His creation. There were a few times when I was so thrilled that I visualized myself doing a pirouette for God, twirling for Him in my imagination, a special thank You dance in my mind. I giggled at my silliness, but then I thought to myself, I bet you God rather likes that I am having so much fun with Him out on the open road.

I know it. I felt peace. I felt pleasure. I felt the desires of my heart being met out on the open road. And it felt good. It felt like a fun I didn’t know I needed until I got to experience it first-hand!

How has God shown you how to have fun with Him? What new desire is He growing in your heart? Commit to having fun with God. You have a summer assignment from me if you are up to the challenge. Go on at least one new adventure with God to explore a new way You can experience Him and encounter something fun You haven’t yet done.  I’d love to hear what you try and what you thought of the experience. Stretch out of your comfort zone.  And don’t forget to get to your feet and applaud God for His goodness at the new gifts He gives you. Thank Him as a form of worship -for His all-generous love and goodness!

Be blessed. Have fun. Life is short here on earth. Let’s enjoy it!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Signature Image: Tracy Stella

Categories // Faith, Joy/Humor, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // 1 John 4:19, Adventure, Beach, Branson, Fun, Generous God, Gifts, Gratitude, laughter, Motorcycle, Psalm 100, Psalm 37:4, Thank You, Worship

How Do You Go Through Change?

05.01.2018 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome to Facet’s and this month’s question:  How do you go through change?  We thought we’d infuse a little humor on the topic with our image selection. Sometimes, a little levity helps when change is on the horizon.

How Do You Go Through the Change? (Blue)

Change happens whether we want it or not. Ultimately, navigating change determines where we wind up.

If we map out our course and cooperate with God, we’ll get to where He intends much quicker. If we resist change, we get mired down in muck.  Our resistance causes us to work much harder to get where we’re going.  Perhaps we’ll never wind up where God meant for us to be.

Maybe we won’t completely miss our intended destination, but we’ll miss out on some of the good God desperately wants to give us.

It’s a powerful motivator─the thought of missing God’s best, because we can’t (or won’t) let go of what used to be. If He has to pry our fingers from the past, it’ll take a whole lot longer to fill our hands with the good things He desires to place in them. Each season is fresh and alive with possibility if we’ll embrace it.

Even some of the hard circumstances in life have possibility. Enduring. Getting through and crossing to the other side of that difficult time has the great reward of intimacy with the Lord if we are willing to “go there” and be real and raw and personal with Him.

On the other side we also see the strength of our spiritual muscle. What faith, perseverance, love, and hope formed in that dark time of desperate trial can do in one woman’s or man’s life. It’s part of our story. It’s part of what we share with others. It’s part of what will minister so very deeply to those who don’t yet know Jesus or have just gotten acquainted with Him. It can make people curious enough to be just the least bit receptive to the good news.

I’m speaking from personal experience. I’ve had dark times. But God’s love illuminated my life and continues to do so. We all have hard things we have to go through. None of us gets an immunization from difficulty.

How we deal with difficulty determines our destiny.

I’ve witnessed the tragedy of people not letting go of the former things, a lack of willingness to press into the new things God has for them.

A delay in receiving God’s goodness breaks my heart when I see it. I want nothing more than for the person to grab hold of God’s hand and walk with Him, stretching and growing, not screaming and kicking. I know His ways don’t always make sense to us. There have been times I’ve been completely confused myself.

That’s when I ask for Him to show me what He’s doing. Where are we going? What’s this about? I try not to ask “why”. Why doesn’t really matter much. The answer to that question isn’t going to bring me anywhere. Instead, I want to go through.  So I pray. I ask for His help. I seek His comfort. I let Him minister to the broken places in my heart. I let Him renew my mind. Sometimes, my thoughts need changing, reshaping. The things I once thought so certain, God shows me otherwise. He softens my heart. He shows me things through His Word and every day people who He is and how much He loves me─always, but especially when circumstances make it appear and feel otherwise.

Those are some of the sweetest, more pure moments between me and God. Tears slip down my cheek, not in sadness but due to His sweetness as He comforts me in a way only He can.

When I see people unwilling to let go of what was and go through change with God’s help, I want to say, “Just cooperate. It’ll be okay! Let go of those old, false beliefs. Lean in. Listen. Let Him help you! He will! Stop fighting! Relax in His loving arms. There’s peace there. Comfort. Adventure and bliss. Yes, life is a battle. Sometimes it’s hard. When it is, let Him help. Let Him help. Let Him help. Let Him help.”

Victim mentality doesn’t bring victory. The blood of Jesus does.

The alternative to walking with God through change? People become jaded. Bitter. Scars jagged, rough to the touch. Maybe can’t be touched. Like a porcupine, prickly so people start avoiding you. It might make you feel safe, but it’s a prison really. A prison of personal pain that doesn’t have to be. We have choice. We can choose to embrace change. Like a little girl who can’t get pried from her daddy’s arms after a nightmare, cling to the process of change. One day you’ll be surprised to wake up and find the nightmare has ended. Sun streams in the bedroom window, light pure as the white sheers letting in the sun’s rays. Dreams good. Hopeful. And dare I say, happy.

In God’s love, mercy and grace, I wake up to those sun rays warming my face and wonder how did I get here to this good, hopeful, dare I say happy place? Change. Some big. Some gradual. All of it good, because God worked it to be that way.

It’s so over-used, but I don’t even care. It feels appropriate. When life gives you lemons, make some lemonade.

Before you think, you just don’t understand what I’ve been through. Maybe you are right. Maybe I don’t.  But Jesus does!  I do know I’ve had some lemons tossed my way, and with God’s help we’re making lemonade.

One of those lemons happened late last year. I was so confused as to what God was doing. I couldn’t see how losing a job I loved so much, that felt like I was fulfilling the very reason I was placed on this planet, could ever be good. It was a passion. I was helping women. And, in fact, it was the fulfillment of a vision He’d given me years before. I felt like He’d plunked me there for “such a time as this”.  It was a rich season with Him. He was so very present, almost palpable.

Poof! It was gone!

It took a moment to catch my breath. I felt like I’d been pushed out a three-story building and landed hard on my back. Not dead, but the wind knocked out of me.

Whether it was God or satan who removed me from that place, I don’t know. It doesn’t really matter. What does matter is what lies ahead.

Even how we deal with change changes. The one constant if we are going to change well is to change with God. The other details don’t always stay the same. I say that because I’m about to share how God helped me through that time at a relatively fast pace (which is DEFINITELY one of the advantages of cooperating with God sooner rather than later). The more quickly I can get to a place to settle down and hear from God, the faster I can get through those difficult times. And since I don’t like pain, I have a high motivation to get a move on!

1. God comforted me in advance of the change.

If you are in a difficult season, look for how God was showing up in advance of it. Journals are a great source. Reflect on what God was saying or doing before the bottom fell out. What conversations did you have with others in the days and weeks preceding? Look for the clues where Christ was preparing your heart and mind ahead of time.

I was told I was going to receive a gift that would not feel like a gift. (More later about how this loss became─and is becoming─a gift.)

2.  God told me to grieve and to reveal His glory through it even as I did.

You see, it’s okay to be sad sometimes. I WAS sad. I had poured my heart and soul into launching the ministry. I knew God was using me to bring deeply traumatized women into places of healing, helping them meet and experience God each day.  I knew He’d used me to set up processes, hire and train employees, and just when things were about to be a little easier because all those things were in place, I wouldn’t get to experience the fruits from all that labor. And I wondered how it could happen when God had given me the vision.

I cried a gallon of tears. But I never gave up hope.

Honestly, in the past, it was NOT GRIEVING that used to get me in a whole heap of trouble. Before I was a believer, I’d sweep things under the rug. The only problem with that is sometimes the rug moves and the pain and problems not dealt with are revealed no matter how much we want to hide from them. Better to deal with problems in season.

3.  Pray and worship.

Along with my grieving, I prayed. A lot. I listened to worship music incessantly. I couldn’t get enough. As I journaled and processed my pain, God ministered to my soul.  If I felt like I was submitting to depression, I’d sing. And sing. And sing. My singing submission to God, knowing He’d see my worship as a sacrifice bringing forth a fragrant aroma. He knows it’s hard to worship when we don’t understand. It’s what makes our worship even sweeter to Him. It’s also what saved me from a spiral of defeat while I was waiting for Him to reveal what was next.

4.  Slap shame in the face.

I know that sounds harsh, but so is shame. Don’t take it. Permission to fight back with the truth! Pull out promises and smack the enemy with the truth about who you are and whose you are!

Sometimes, the things we are changing from and through require us to deal with shame. You see, the enemy wanted to bury me with shame and embarrassment.  (Even in the writing of this post, he didn’t want me to be real and share, to be vulnerable about what could have been very shameful.)

Again, in God’s goodness, He kept playing a song for me — especially before a couple of significant meetings. I couldn’t escape the song Lions by Skillet. Every time I heard it, it was as if God was saying to me, “Hold your head up. You did nothing wrong. I have something new for you. Be brave little lion.”

Part of what He was doing was redeeming a situation from the past. He was showing me how much I’d grown by walking with Him. While the situation made me sad, it didn’t devastate me. Even something as significant as “losing” what I felt was my calling, couldn’t destroy me or my spirit.  That was different from the past. He was showing me I knew and know who I am. His. I am His.

5.  Change takes stamina. Sometimes we need to rest before we can run a new race.

God wouldn’t let me move forward until I got some rest. I didn’t realize how exhausted I truly was until I was given the chance to rest. If you know me, you know rest isn’t an easy word for me to embrace. I like to do. To move. To accomplish awesome things with and for God. But if my tank is empty, I’ll go nowhere fast. That’s for all of us. We all need refueling.

I had just left an intense time of ministry that had left me emotionally drained. Working with trauma survivors is no easy task (and without God’s grace – impossible!)

Not only was I emotionally drained, I had spiritual scars. I knew to expect spiritual attack stepping into a ministry that pierced the darkness of human trafficking. Even expecting it, I underestimated it. The battles were intense. Most mornings I was up at 4 or 4:30 praying, spiritually girding myself for the day ahead. It was necessary for my spiritual survival.

Being on guard at that level of intensity, engaging in emotional trauma work which is far more tiring than a vigorous workout, left me limp and exhausted.

Every time I’d ask God, “What do you want me to do?” (Martha, anyone?)

God would say, “Rest.”

Me, always wanting to get going. “What do you want me to do?”

“Rest.”

So, eventually I did. I embraced the idea of rest. I grabbed my blanket and Bible and wrapped myself in rest.

6.  Get ready. Change requires us to get ready.

Really, all the above was part of that. On your mark, get set, GO!

7.  God is doing a new thing. After all, that’s what change is about.

God started to reveal a new vision. It felt very much like the beginnings of the vision He’d once given me to start a home to help 4 to 6 women in a family setting. You’ll need lots of help, things beyond you. You’ll coordinate many people to help these women. It is beyond you and your individual capacity.

It didn’t make sense back then any more than this new vision God is giving me makes sense. But honestly, it gives me comfort that it doesn’t make sense. Most ideas from God seem that way at first. If it felt easy, I’d think it was my idea. Because it’s ridiculous (in the best of ways), there’s a pretty high likelihood it’s from God.

I may not have all the details exactly right, but He’s casting a vision that brings old and new together. Again, I don’t know all the particulars. I don’t know His timeline. I do know He tends to give me long-range visions, so this could be a ten year plan (or longer).

I don’t know, but I don’t need to know. He’s unfolding the details, enough to get me really excited about the future.

Remember how I’d shared earlier I was told I was going to receive a gift that would not feel like a gift?

I received the gift of rest, grieving, and intimacy with God.

Then, I received the gift of hope and a new dream. God has reassured me He didn’t take from me, but He wants to expand the vision He’d once given me. He has me doing seemingly unrelated things that will come together for more of His glory.

I opened my hands and asked Him to place all of His goodness in them because I love Him. I know He is good. I know He has good things for me, and for the people He places in my circle of influence. He will minister to my heart and He will help me minister to others. If all I ever had in life were good things, I’d never grow.

Last winter when I was planted in the soil of confusion, grief, and rest, God grew me. He’s doing a new thing. And now I’m ready to go.

How is God calling you to change?

Are you ready? On your mark, get set, go!

Oh, and don’t forget to hold your head up. You need to see where you’re going!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Signature Image: Tracy Stella

Categories // Faith, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // Change, Get Ready, gift, grief, hope, New Dream, New Vision, On Your Mark Get Set Go, Perseverance, prayer, rest, Shame, Stamina, Surrender, victory, Worship

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