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Have You Found Your Family?

02.05.2019 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome to February and our topic this month at FACETS: Have you found your family?  Our hope and prayer is we all grow in our ability to connect and relate with others.  May our writing this month encourage you to step forward boldly in your own relationships.  Stop by each week this month to see what Jen, Kim, and our guest contributor have to say on the topic of finding family. Let this February be full of LOVE.  We’re excited to see and hear what God does in your relationships, so let us know.

Have You Found Your Family? (T. Stella)

Out of the blue, but not beyond God’s sovereign timing, I received an email that has the potential to change my life.

Early last winter, I took a DNA test.  My initial thought was, it would be great to understand what nationality I am. Being adopted, I didn’t know.

I’m 50. Why bother exploring my ancestry? Does it really matter where we come from?

My answer to that question is, “yes”.  Understanding our history helps us fulfill our destiny.  When we don’t know who we are, it wreaks havoc on who we can become.

Before I became a believer in Christ, the not knowing really messed with me.  I wouldn’t have been able to articulate this in words, but I had major attachment issues.  If my own father didn’t want me, who would?  It’s a hard thing when a little girl doesn’t think her daddy loves her.  The thing she fears most is rejection, of not being loved.

With God’s help, I’ve grown to learn my daddy’s absence had nothing to do with me.

One of the sweetest gifts I received as a result of accepting Jesus in my heart is the knowledge of His acceptance.  He acknowledges me as His daughter. He comforts me. He holds me. He wipes away every tear. He celebrates every joy. He is sweet, loving, kind, and generous. Trustworthy─and I need that! He fills the deep well of my heart and soul with the knowledge I am dearly loved by my Father in heaven.  He abides in my heart. His love changed me. His love healed me. His love helped me see my biological father through eyes of compassion.

God helped (and helps) me navigate abandonment and attachment issues.  He reminds me He is Immanuel, God with us–God with me. Always. To the end of the age.

Perhaps because of the confidence I have in knowing I am a daughter of the Most High, cherished and dearly loved, I had the courage to listen to God’s prompting.  Apparently, God thought the timing was “now” to understand more of my history.  So I purchased the DNA kit. Nervous and excited to learn my family history, I did the unglamorous bit of surrendering my saliva to the scientists who would help me understand more about who I am, where I come from.  History to help connect the dots.

The ancestry email came back with surprising results.  I always thought I had a lot more Irish in my DNA, what with my dark hair and freckles (without the rather cool Irish accent).  Come to find out, I am only a wee bit Irish; 8% to be exact.  I’m also 14% German with the bulk of my bloodline descending from England, Wales and Northwestern Europe.  Who knew?  I might be more British than my friend who came from Great Britain (and has the cool accent to go along with the ancestry).  I had a scone the last time I was at Starbucks if that counts for anything.

Have you ever thought something your whole life only to find out it wasn’t true?

I wasn’t Irish (or not that much). I wasn’t abandoned. I was dearly loved. I wasn’t the only one who didn’t know who her family was.

Right about the same time I sent my DNA for analysis, my cousin had done the same.  She too didn’t grow up in the Bennett clan, but shared the same genetic makeup.  Karen was adopted as well. Small world. Very small world.  She lives not too far from me. She also sells real estate (weird, right?). She seems adventurous, so we have that in common too.

I’m grateful to Karen, because she reached out delicately suggesting we might be related.  Cautiously, thoughtfully, she couched her first connection with a lot of maybe and might language. “We might be related.”  She mentioned names I recognized.  I knew a hint of family history. She spoke about those things carefully.

We have a coffee date planned. I look forward to connecting face-to-face.

My cousin already gave me a gift, and it’s not even Christmas!  You see, I have a sister. I knew about her. I met her once, after our father’s funeral when I was in high school. It’s a long story for another time, perhaps. The short story is I met my biological father once, and then he passed away not long thereafter.

I met his entire family at his funeral. He is one of 11 children with a sea of relatives. Between the roil of emotion inside me and the sheer volume of Bennetts, that day will forever go down in my mind as one of overwhelm (even as I was happy to finally meet the family I’d been so curious about).

It almost felt like I was watching a play: lots of unfamiliar characters and more than a little drama.

That day became one I set on a shelf, safely away from having to process through all those emotions.

My sister and I are six years apart, but our lives have been miles apart. Literally. She lives in France. I knew that. My grandmother on my mom’s side had shared the news with me a number of years ago.  When I found out, I tried to reach out to her, but I didn’t have any luck connecting.  I thought she didn’t want to, and I wanted to respect her wishes and not encroach upon her life if she wasn’t in that place – able to risk a relationship with a sister who also happened to be a stranger.

I had shared with my cousin that I’d tried to reach out to my sister to no avail. Perhaps, because my cousin knows what it feels like to have siblings you don’t know, she gave me the gift of my sister.  She shared with my sister what I had conveyed via email and my sister reached out via Facebook.  This is one of those times when social media serves a good cause, it’s original cause, to connect people.

My sister’s name is Laura. She never knew I tried to reach out. She never got the message.

You know what I think about that?

I think it just wasn’t time.  Perhaps, she wouldn’t have been prepared for it. Perhaps, I wouldn’t have been able to handle it.  But now? Now is the time.

Now is the time to get to know this person you have a strong desire to get to know, because you share something, even if there are no shared memories.  There’s a sibling bond in spite of it all.  The desire to connect pulls you into places of courage and vulnerability.

Laura and I arranged for a time to talk via video chat. I was nervous. After all, the last time she and I spoke she was in 4th grade. Now, she is 44.  An entire life lived by her and by me.

My biggest fear was our time together would be awkward and uncomfortable.  Again, God was helping me with my fear of rejection and abandonment by bringing me my sister and having me risk those very things.  What if she didn’t like me? What if we couldn’t connect? What if the whole thing was just too weird?

What if? What if? What if?

Have you ever had those “what if” moments, but “went for it” anyway?  If not, I encourage you to do so. You might receive a blessing when you do.

I decided I was going to go for broke and put myself out there, really me, really out there. No pretending. No posturing. No saying what I thought someone wanted me to say. Speaking from my heart. Speaking of hopes and dreams. Sharing. Authentically sharing.

It was no coincidence I was reading Dare to Lead by Brene’ Brown. Her book Daring Greatly had started me on this journey of vulnerability, overcoming shame, and being loved well like the Velveteen Rabbit whose fur was completely rubbed off.  He looked a little scruffy, but he was so loved.  That is me – emotionally scruffy, but so well loved.

I could be vulnerable and let my sister see my emotionally scruffy, yet well-loved side.

The day before our conversation was scheduled, I prayed. A lot.

I prayed God would help us connect with one another in spite of only one shared memory: the day we met, eating chicken under a white gazebo near the lake.  Our brave moms orchestrated that meeting for us.  Two different moms, same dad. Laura and I shared the fiery, feisty Bennett DNA.  In the nature versus nurture scenario, I can attest to the nature part being true.  From everything I’ve ever heard, there’s a whole lot of spunk coursing through our veins.

I prayed our video chat wouldn’t be weird and uncomfortable. It wasn’t.  Because we were both brave and showed our real selves.

At one point Laura did the sweetest thing, she was extremely sensitive to how I would receive her sharing memories about our father with me.  You see, she got the daddy I wanted and she knew that.  She didn’t want to hurt me by sharing too much.  She was daddy’s little girl until he passed.   And, of course, I would have wanted that too. Of course, that is true.  However, by the time Laura came along our father had six more years to mature from the time I was born.  He was in a different place, and I’m very glad my sister has these sweet memories of him.

I’m glad my sister was brave enough to share them with me, because she gave me a gift: glimpses of him. He was sweet to her. He read with her. (I love to read too.) She shared his military picture with me, and for some reason, seeing him in uniform made me cry. Perhaps, it’s because he looked brave too.

God’s timing is everything.  Perhaps, if I weren’t so grounded in the deep, immeasurable love for me I wouldn’t have been able to handle hearing those memories. But I am different today from that young girl who met her father’s family at his funeral.  I am strong, emotionally strong, because God has strengthened me.  His love filled (and fills) my need for love and acceptance.

Because of that, I could handle hearing Laura’s heart, her memories.  Her courage to share them with me, coupled with her sensitivity in how she shared them, served to endear her to my heart.

God connected my heart to hers because she was so compassionate (among other things).

I was grateful Laura shared her true self.  I explained to her I didn’t want her to have to sensor what she said. Otherwise, I wouldn’t be getting to know the real her.  If I wanted to get to know my real sister, then I needed to give her “permission” to be her real self.

I want to know my sister. I want to hear about her life. I want to share with her about mine.  That takes vulnerability. That takes risk. But love says, it’s worth it!

I could write for a long time about that first, lengthy video chat.  There was so much joy in our conversation, I think for us both, even as we talked about difficult things at times.  My heart felt rich and full to overflowing. Connection will do that.

God answered my prayer. He connected my heart to my sisters’, and it wasn’t weird one bit.  There was a bond, not quite explainable, but evidenced during our engagement.

I wish she lived closer, but perhaps this feisty, fiery, 50 year old adventurous “Bennett girl” will have the perfect excuse to fly half way around the world and meet another feisty, fiery, 44 year old adventurous “Bennett girl”.  If and when she does, this big sis will fling her arms around little sis and say, “It’s so good to see you!”

Because that’s what you do when you find your family.

Whether you grew up knowing your family your whole life, or you were adopted like me, how can you grow to learn more about who you are by understanding your family history?

Understanding our history helps us fulfill our destiny. There are lessons to learn, mistakes to avoid, and hopefully familial wisdom to draw upon that will help us become the best version of ourselves.  I pray God helps you understand when the time is right.  I pray He reveals what He wants you to learn about Him, yourself, and others. I pray you know as a child of God, you ARE a part of family─His! And He loves you beyond measure!!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Signature Image: Tracy Stella [Read more…]

Categories // Finding Family, Friendship, Life, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // Abandonment, Adoption, Ancestry, Attachment, Brene' Brown, DNA, Family, Love, Sister, Vulnerability

What Are Your Dreams? 7 Ways to Help You Realize Them

01.01.2019 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome to Facets of Faith and a fresh new year bursting with possibility. Let me (Tracy) be one of the first to wish you a Happy New Year on behalf of our team!  Another year has come and gone.  Can you believe it?

What would this year look like if we started with a dream rather than a resolution?  Resolutions are easily broken, but dreams can be realized.

What Do You Dream About? (T. Stella)

Dreams are achieved when we step out in faith with intention. Generally, our desires don’t just drop from a cloud like rain.  Fulfillment of our dreams requires our participation.

Let’s look at some of the ways we can participate with God to realize our dreams.

#1.  Permission to explore our dreams by faith

A great place to start is by giving ourselves permission to embrace the dreams God has for us.  Dreams aren’t impractical. Dreams aren’t futile. Dreams are a lifeline to a fulfilling life. There may be naysayers. Pay them no mind!  Permission to dream requires faith God has something good specifically assigned and designed for each of us.  He does!

Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.─Hebrews 11:1 NIV

The very idea of a dream is something not yet seen.  Just like God gave Joseph a vision for his life, God has a vision for our lives as well.  It might be fuzzy, or perhaps we see it with great clarity. Either way, we should hold tight to the confidence that Christ Jesus does, in fact, have things we should hope for in this life as well as for eternity.  We have permission to dream, because we serve a God who is full of great possibility.  As His child, that means we are full of great possibility too!

P.S. If the dream feels ridiculously large and outrageous, that might very well be in line with the heartbeat of God.  Scripture gives us many examples of the impossibly large and ambitious achievement happening when one individual leaned into what God had for him or her.

#2.  Pray as we pursue our dreams

The best dreams to work toward are those inspired by God. We don’t want to serve false idols and chase futile dreams.  As we pray, God instructs us.  He gives us the desires of our heart, not like a genie in a bottle. Rather, He aligns our heart with His.  And when our hearts are aligned with His, so too, are our dreams.  The things we desire shaped in the quiet moments with God.

Take delight in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.─Psalm 37:4 NIV

When I was younger, I wanted to write a book. God planted that desire in my heart. However, He didn’t let it come to fruition back then. Can I tell you? I am grateful!

Had I published a book in my 20’s it would have been something likely to have caused me embarrassment today. The desires of my heart weren’t aligned with God’s then. He protected me from myself and my foolish desires.  The idea to write a book wasn’t foolish, but any topic I would have written about would have been.

That’s something good to keep in mind when we feel like it’s taking too long to achieve our dream. Perhaps it’s not for now.

Sometimes it is. Sometimes it is not.

How will we know?

Pray. It’s not only a great place to start; it’s a great place to continually pursue God’s heart, instruction, and timing.

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.─1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 NIV

I love writing prayers out in my prayer journal. The process of writing them slows me down long enough to help me listen. I’m a talker, and I move fast. If I feel like something is from God, I want to get moving – now!   Prayer protects me from being too impulsive and rushing ahead of God.

Prayer doesn’t need to be overly complicated (although we often make it so). How would you talk with your best friend? Use that as a model for how you can pray to God. When we are with our friends, we have a conversation. We take turns talking.  Otherwise, it’s just a monologue.

Writing my prayers helps me move from monologue to dialogue.

As I processed the dream God is unfolding in my heart, I wrote a question as a prayer.

What do you want me to do?

Pretty short and sweet, right? Who can’t pray a heartfelt prayer like that? It took seconds.

What I felt God put on my heart about my dream is this:  research and rest.

God isn’t complicated (even though He is complex).

I knew what I needed to do from taking only a few minutes out to hear what He had to say.

Research and rest were my instruction from above.

You might think a word like “rest” would make a woman like me (and perhaps you) a little nutty.  Who wants to sit around and do nothing?  Some people, perhaps, but I’m not one of them.

How can a “doer” be okay with a word like “rest”, especially when there are dreams at stake?

That leads me to point number three in our pursuit of dreams.

#3.  Practice stillness in pursuit of our dreams

The practice of stillness in pursuit of our dreams is a gift from God. His gift helps us abide in His peace.  The alternative to resting in Him is to encounter chaos as we engage in useless striving.

One of the lessons I’ve learned over the course of my walk with God is this: He is a God of order. He doesn’t operate out of chaos.  And I can’t hear Him very well if that’s the place I’m operating from.

In order to hear Him properly, I need to be still.

He says, “Be still and know that I am God.”─Psalm 46:10a NIV

Call me Crazy. I actually love the Scripture above. I’ve learned to embrace it, because I had the opportunity to experience it as a gift first hand, and in a very meaningful way.

I was helping run a home for human trafficking survivors. I was in over my head, but always felt God holding my hand.  Before we’d opened the home, I’d felt that Scripture was one of the ones that was to be in the house as a visual reminder to me (as well as to staff and the women we served too).

Whenever there was a hard day in the pursuit of my God-given dream, I’d look at those words and be reminded. God’s got this!  If I am still and rest in God, He will do the heavy lifting. He will reveal Himself as God. His glory will be revealed. Because He’s that good!

He doesn’t want me or you to carry any heavy burden in pursuit of His plans for us, our dreams. He will shoulder the weight as long as we make the conscious choice to be still.  It’s about choosing peace, not about inactivity.

I promise you when God had me on mission in the safe house, there was never a dull moment. There was much to do, but the being still helped me know how to do it.  In that stillness, God gave instruction. I never felt alone. He was nearer to me than a breath. It was one of the sweetest seasons I’ve had with Him, even as it was also one of the hardest.

But He was faithful to reveal Himself to me as I achieved that dream with Him, listening to the still, small voice who helped me not to fall flat on my face (even as I made mistakes in my humanness).

Now, when God tells me to “Be Still”, I easily can. I know what that really means. Rest in Him. He’s got the rest.  And from that position of perfect peace which truly doesn’t make sense sometimes, He’ll help me to know what to do even as He helps me to encounter Him in a deep, meaningful fashion.

What if that’s what pursuing our dreams with God is really about?  What if it’s about going on a journey with Him to encounter Him? I believe in large part that’s exactly what pursuit of our dreams is about.  We get to encounter the living, loving God who made us on purpose and for a purpose.

Maybe you don’t think that’s true for you.

Keep reading.

#4.  Remember God’s promises in pursuit of our dreams

It makes me incredibly sad when people don’t think God has a plan for them. If that’s you (or if you need reminding), God does have plans for you.  You might not know exactly what those plans are yet (totally okay), but His promises say He has plans for you.

He wants us to dream.  Imagining what could be is part of the fun.  Pursuing dreams should be fun, even if there’s work involved. When we are in that place of imagining, God can inspire us. Trust Him.  Trust He’ll help you recognize what those dreams He desires for you are.  Trust, too, that He’ll help you achieve them.

He’s a creative God and He has specific things only you can do.  Those things look very different from what He has for me or anyone else for that matter.  They’re your assignment, not anyone else’s.

If you’ve encountered Scripture for any length of time, you’re likely familiar with these words.  But just because they’re familiar, don’t let their significance slip past you.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”─Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

If we have hope of pursuing our dreams, we need to believe this to be true FOR US.  These aren’t just words on a page.  They are God’s promise to you.  They’re God’s promise to me as well.

Raise your arm and place your hand all the way out in front of you as if you are reaching to open a door.

Just past where your fingertips reach is where your dreams await.  It’s a hope. Dreams are “out there” in the future.  Once they’re realized, God will give us new ones.  It’s how we grow.

What door might God open for you if you reach for your dreams?  Just beyond the door is where hope lives. Just beyond the door is your destiny waiting to be fulfilled.  When we reach for our dreams, we reach for our God-given future.  Only He knows what fully lays ahead, but if we reach for our future with His help, we can achieve what it is He has for us.

Perhaps, there is a deep root of unbelief that God desires to chop thru right here and now.  When we believe the lies of the enemy, it makes it hard for us to believe God’s truth is for us.  Satan plants seeds of doubt and unbelief in the soil of lies he tells us in his language designed to paralyze us from pursuing our dreams.  Satan places roots of insecurity, of not good enough, of you’ll never amount to anything, or that’s impossible and nothing but a pipedream into our hearts and minds.

But here’s the thing…

We need to make a conscious choice not to believe a single one of his lies!  If the words we say to ourselves or the ones others have spoken over us make it feel impossible to believe God could give us a dream and really desire for us to achieve it, listen to me.

Dismiss those words!

The devil would love to destroy your dreams.  Don’t let Him!

Here is a weapon to fight back with, another of God’s promises we are challenged to believe on our good days, as well as our bad ones.

I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful, I know that full well.─Psalm 139:14 NIV

Even if you don’t believe it at first, speak it aloud as if you do.  These words are ones God says about you, and they’re powerful.  You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are one of His works and He finds you wonderful. Praise Him for that.  Praise Him until you know it full well.

Put an index card or a sticky note on your mirror, in your car, in your desk drawer, on your fridge, wherever you will see it.  Write this on it:

I am fearfully and wonderfully made. I am one of God’s works and He finds me wonderful.  Imagine the dreams I can achieve with Him when I fully believe these things.  I pray, God, that You help me believe I am fearfully and wonderfully made as we pursue Your dreams for me.  Thank You for making me in Your image, wonderful indeed.  In Jesus’ name. Amen!

Say it aloud each day until it becomes truth you believe, really believe.

I have wrestled with insecurity, but it has only been when I believed what God says about me that I’ve been able to look past myself and toward others in pursuit of my God-given dreams.

Knowing who we are in Christ gives us confidence to step out boldly in pursuit of God and the dreams He has for us.  Confidence gives us courage.

#5.  We must take courage in pursuit of our dreams

If God gives us a dream, I can almost guarantee it’ll be big.  It’s how He reveals Himself as God.  When a dream is beyond our ability, beyond our capabilities, God demonstrates Himself as real.  He is the power source and the only way a big dream becomes possible.

That sounds great on paper.  But when we are living it as part of the reality of our life, it can feel terrifying at first.  I’m a bit of a thrill seeker and still there are times when my knees have knocked together at the idea of stepping into a dream, my destiny really, with God.

God has stretched and grown me so much in those times.  Because we’ve pursued big dreams together, I’ve grown closer to Him. I’ve grown to hear His voice with greater clarity. I’ve grown to chase after a big dream … as long as He’s in it and leading it!

How?

I sought the LORD, and he answered me;

            he delivered me from all my fears.

Those who look to him are radiant;

            their faces are never covered with shame.

This poor man called, and the LORD  heard him;

            he saved him from all his troubles.

The angel of the LORD encamps around those who fear him,

            and he delivers them.

Taste and see that the LORD is good;

            blessed is the one who takes refuge in him.

─Psalm 34:4-8 NIV

God delivers us from our fears. Not just some of them. All of them. He knows fear is debilitating to us and to the fulfillment of our dreams.  But there are sometimes I’ve had to “do it afraid”.  It can feel like cliff diving into turbulent seas below.  Trembling, I approach the edge and peer over, perched a little too high for comfort.  I have no idea what’s beneath the choppy waters as white caps rise up taunting me.  But in a moment of bravery I think to myself, here goes nothing!  Dive. Splash. Come up for air. Wow! That was pretty cool. A bit of adrenaline helped me do it as the blood of Christ coursing through my veins gave me the courage to leap.

But it’s important for us not to leap hap hazardously.  Safety in the leaping lies only when we hear God’s voice saying, “Now! Leap now!”  It’s in our seeking we find safety.

I love the picture of the angel of the LORD encamping around me. It gives me great courage to jump off the edge and into what God has for me.  And when I have done that, I have tasted and seen the goodness of the LORD. I have had encounters with Him I would not have otherwise had if I hadn’t taken courage and leapt into what He had for me.

Encountering God in the midst of our dreams is exhilarating.

And after we jump once, it gets a little easier. We know we can take refuge in the One who encourages us to taste and see that He is good. He blesses us when we do.

#6.  God’s timing is imperative in pursuit of our dreams

Think about how fast 2019 came. Doesn’t it seem like we only recently ushered in 2018? Time marches forward quickly. If we aren’t careful, we could let time tick by and miss what God has for us.

We take time for granted, like it will always be there on our side.  But what would life look like if we thought of time as a limited and valuable resource?

Yes, we have all of eternity to live for Christ.  But the time He’s allotted for each of us here on earth eventually runs out. We won’t always be here. We won’t always have an opportunity to pursue Him and His plans for us here on earth.

Our dreams have an expiration date and so do we.

If we remain connected to God and His desires for us, we are far less likely to one day lie on our death bed lamenting about what could have been. Regrets happen when we don’t walk in the reality of Christ’s sacrifice for us. He paid a high price for us to live this life. Shouldn’t we live it?

Dream big. Don’t waste time. A day spent today is gone forever. Did you do something to pursue Christ and the dreams He has for you? It’s not too late to begin living life in that light. Today can be the first day you live, really live, in pursuit of your dreams. It’s your destiny.

Now listen, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money. “Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes. Instead, you ought to say, “If it is the Lord’s will, we will live and do this or that.”─James 4:13-15 NIV

Even as it’s important not to squander time, it’s equally imperative we don’t go running ahead of God in pursuit of our dreams either.  We want to walk in wisdom with the Lord as we engage in His plan─not ours.  That includes His timing. Sometimes, God is working something out in us, preparing us in some way for what He has next.

We want to learn the lessons He has for us in this season in anticipation of what He has for our future.  Only He knows what we need when we need it.

When I was first called to work with deeply traumatized women, God needed to consecrate me. There were many lessons in “dying to self” before I ever stepped foot in that safe house. Waiting was for me. It was for them too. God had me closely connected to Him, and He did not let me deviate what felt like an inch to the left or the right.

It was my dream to help these women, but it was also part of God’s plan to help me do that effectively.

I needed to learn how to listen, really listen, to His voice. He needed to check for my obedience. Would I listen? Quickly? Or would He need to repeat Himself?  He couldn’t release me until I was prepared to move with Him, at His slightest nudge.

If He’d have released me too early, I could have caused great harm.

If He’d have released me too early, I’d have collapsed from the weight of feeling too responsible for outcomes.

Instead, God gave me the gift over time and before I engaged He encouraged me with this statement:

You are responsible for your obedience. I (God) am responsible for the outcome.

For a woman who tends to put too much responsibility on herself, God needed to liberate me, so I could help bring freedom to women by pointing them to Christ.  My dream required me to listen and obey.  My dream required me not to wear a false sense of responsibility.

Wait for the LORD;

            be strong and take heart

            and wait for the LORD.

─Psalm 27:14 NIV

It takes restraint to take heart and be strong enough to wait for the LORD to fulfill our dreams. Our willingness to wait is a measure of how much we trust God to do what He says He will.

Do we trust God enough to wait when He asks us to?

If you are feeling brave you can pray words I’ve prayed for myself, as protection, really.  I do not want to fall in a pit of failure, because I outpaced God’s plan for my life by running ahead of Him. I’ve asked God not to promote me until He knows I’m ready. I don’t want to hurt myself or someone else, because I charged ahead before God had taught me what I needed to know in order to carry out my calling.

I never want my dream to die because I destroyed it. Sometimes, that requires me to be strong and take heart while waiting on the Lord.

Here’s the prayer:

Lord, You alone know what You have ahead for me in pursuit of my dreams. Please do not promote me until You know I am ready. Help me to hear Your voice and Your heart in this matter. Show me Your good plans. Give me the desires of my heart. And show me when I’m ready. Don’t let me move forward until I am, but also help me to step forward boldly when You say, “The time is now.” In Jesus’ name, Amen!

#7.  God gives us responsibility in pursuit of our dreams

When God gives us a dream, He gives us the responsibility of achieving it (in His strength).

Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.─1 Peter 4:10 NIV

A God-given dream is given. It’s His gift to us. But it’s also His gift to others.

Rest assured a dream from God has servanthood at its heart. Yes, He loves you and cares about you greatly. His plan is to use others in your life to show you how much.

But do you know what that means?

He also desires to use us to do that for someone else. Many someone else’s.

If our dream doesn’t somehow serve others, we should pause and seek God to see if it’s from Him.

He will bless us, but He doesn’t want our efforts to be self-serving. We are to be stewards, faithful stewards.

Consider this: If God has given us a dream (and He has even if we haven’t recognized it yet), He wants us to steward it well. We have responsibility to faithfully pursue the dreams God plants in our hearts.

He has entrusted us with our dreams. He wants to do great things in us and through us as a result of them. Will we let Him use us to serve others? Do we trust Him enough to send others to minister to us if we do?

What if someone else’s blessing from God depends on your participation?

God’s dreams will always have roots of His love reaching the lost and lonely, the weary and the brokenhearted.  Will we let Him use us in that way?  Who will be there to do that when we need God’s love and encouragement?

My husband dreamed of having a wife a long time ago now. He never thought he’d have one. His dream was to be married.

As God fulfilled Sam’s dream, He asked Sam to serve. For the role of a spouse is, in large part, to serve the other.  Sam’s dream has stewardship laced throughout it. God stewarded my heart to Sam. Sam has loved me well as part of his dream to have a wife. He’s had to listen and obey the Lord.  He had to wait. He’s prayed. He’s had to have courage to lead a rather strong woman with sacrificial love.

But in all that, I know Sam would say he has been blessed. He had a dream. God made it come true, but I can tell you I am nothing like what Sam had imagined his wife would be like. But God knows what each of us needs, when we need it.

I needed Sam and he needed me … and I’m glad he dreamed that dream of having a wife. I’m glad he pursued me when I was challenging, mistrusting, and prickly. Because he was a faithful steward of my heart, I have learned to love─to receive love first and then be able to give it.

What would my life have looked like if Sam hadn’t had that dream and loved me so well?

A lot different. That’s for sure.

My dreams would have been a lot different too.

Today, God has given us a big dream together. It requires courage, love, prayer, waiting, seeking, & moving forward when God says “go”. It requires imagining and exploring how the dream might unfold, how God might want it to look.

Walking with God toward a dream is exciting.

This year my non-resolution is to pursue God’s dream for me, the very specific dream He’s unfolding. I’m writing a business plan to launch a non-profit. God is casting vision. I’m listening. I’m exploring. I’m letting Him lead and reveal. And I’m doing exactly what He told me to do when I asked Him in my prayer.

I’m resting and researching. It’s how I’ll realize this new dream God has given me.

What do you dream about? Perhaps, God would have you explore the seven points above and take steps toward realizing your God-given dreams.  What is one practical way you can participate with God to achieve your dreams today?  Don’t delay. Your dreams await.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Signature Image: Tracy Stella

Categories // Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // 1 Peter 4:10, 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18, Courage, Dreams, Faith, God's Promises, Hebrews 11:1, James 4:13-15, Jeremiah 29:11, prayer, Psalm 139:14, Psalm 27:14, Psalm 34:4-8, Psalm 37:4, Psalm 46:10, Servanthood, Stewardship, Stillness, Timing

The Holy Spirit’s Role in the Story of Christmas

12.08.2018 by Tracy Stella //

The Story of Christmas: Holy Spirit (T. Stella)

Welcome to Christmas, a magical time of year because we celebrate Christ. I know this season can stir up feelings that don’t feel like celebration for some.  If you find yourself in a hard place this Christmas, I pray you feel God’s closeness even more.  I pray the presence of Immanuel (God with us) overwhelm you with His love, hope, joy, peace, and goodness.  I pray He ministers to you through the power of His Spirit. 

And if you find yourself on top of life’s mountains, I pray you take time to thank Jesus for all the beauty He has brought into your life.  I pray you are generous with your love and blessings out of the overflow of His goodness to you.   May you bring light, hope, and love to those whom God brings across your path this Christmas season.

The Light of the World did that for us, so too should we for others.

But these things don’t happen of our own accord. Love, hope, joy, peace, goodness, and light come as a result of the power of the Holy Spirit.  Generosity is a mindset He breeds in us.  Courage is an attribute He calls out in us.  It is through His deposit that we can carry out our high calling to love one another well.

The Holy Spirit prompts Christmas love. He always did. He always will. 

He is evidenced in the story of Christ from the very beginning.  Angels reassured Mary of His coming.

In the sixth month of Elizabeth’s pregnancy, God sent the angel Gabriel to Nazareth, a village in Galilee,  to a virgin named Mary. She was engaged to be married to a man named Joseph, a descendant of King David.  Gabriel appeared to her and said, “Greetings, favored woman! The Lord is with you!”

Confused and disturbed, Mary tried to think what the angel could mean. “Don’t be afraid, Mary,” the angel told her, “for you have found favor with God!  You will conceive and give birth to a son, and you will name him Jesus. He will be very great and will be called the Son of the Most High. The Lord God will give him the throne of his ancestor David. And he will reign over Israel forever; his Kingdom will never end!”

Mary asked the angel, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.”

The angel replied, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, and the power of the Most High will overshadow you. So the baby to be born will be holy, and he will be called the Son of God. What’s more, your relative Elizabeth has become pregnant in her old age! People used to say she was barren, but she has conceived a son and is now in her sixth month. For the word of God will never fail.”

Mary responded, “I am the Lord’s servant. May everything you have said about me come true.” And then the angel left her.  Luke 1:26-38 NLT (Emphasis Mine)

Imagine being greeted by an angel (frightening enough in and of itself) and then being told you were going to birth the Son of God through the Holy Spirit and the power of the Most High. 

Think of Mary’s courage.  Christmas not possible without it.  An ordinary young woman made a difference in each of our eternal destiny, because she allowed the Holy Spirit to guide her.

One of the beautiful things I have found as I walk with Christ is the harder and higher our calling, the sweeter the intimacy with Him. And through that intimacy He speaks.  When our calling is of extreme significance, I believe God goes out of His way to confirm for us that we are on the right track.   The good news of following Christ is we can’t make a mistake.  Notice I said following Christ.  He won’t lead us astray, even if He has us traverse some difficult terrain from time to time.

If we’re not following the leading of the Holy Spirit, we’re bound to make mistakes.

Even as we follow, God knows we need reassurance. And He shows up, even as He’s always there.  However, sometimes in His all-knowing way, God decides to turn up the volume of His presence.  He gives Christmas reassurance in unexpected places.

A few days later Mary hurried to the hill country of Judea, to the town where Zechariah lived. She entered the house and greeted Elizabeth. At the sound of Mary’s greeting, Elizabeth’s child leaped within her, and Elizabeth was filled with the Holy Spirit. Elizabeth gave a glad cry and exclaimed to Mary, “God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed.  Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me?  When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy.  You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said.” Luke 1:39-45 NLT (Emphasis Mine)

Baby John (the Baptist) was the fulfillment of prophecy.  He would be the one to go in advance to proclaim Christ.  John recognized divinity while still in his mother’s womb.  And the Holy Spirit continued to fill His role in the Christmas story by providing encouragement to a virgin girl named Mary, 3 months pregnant, and likely afraid even as she was courageous.  The Lord knew exactly the words Mary needed to hear and the Holy Spirit divinely inspired Elizabeth to speak words of encouragement and acknowledgement of Christ Jesus to her.

Notice the Holy Spirit’s words to Mary, that she was blessed because she believed.

When situations seem unusual they do require an extra measure of belief.

Faith in the Christmas story requires an extra measure of belief.

God blesses those who do.

Yes, with eternal life (John 3:16). But blessings here on earth too in the land of the living (Psalm 27:13).  One of the biggest blessings we have been given as believers is the deposit of the Holy Spirit who lives inside of us.

It is God who enables us, along with you, to stand firm for Christ. He has commissioned us, and he has identified us as his own by placing the Holy Spirit in our hearts as the first installment that guarantees everything he has promised us. 2 Corinthians 1:21-22 NLT

Just as Mary was encouraged by the Holy Spirit, we can be too.  We can have the promise of Christmas – God alive inside of us that leads and guides us into His presence and into His love.  Out of that overflow, we are empowered to extend Christmas love to others.  The Holy Spirit enables us to do all things that God calls us to, even the hard things. 

Without the hard things Mary cooperated with God for, we wouldn’t have Christmas.

The Holy Spirit birthed the beauty of Christmas in Mary. What does He desire to birth in you this Christmas season?  After all, His story is our story.

Remember, favored woman! The Lord is with you!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page. 

And don’t forget to check back with us to see what Jennifer and Kim have to say about the Story of Christmas.

Signature Image: Tracy Stella

Categories // Faith, The Story of Christmas, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // 2 Corinthians 1:21-22, Believe, Christmas, Courage, Holy Spirit, Luke 1:26-38, Luke 1:39-45

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