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How Do We Grow in Intimacy?

07.02.2019 by Tracy Stella //

Welcome to FACETS of Faith, sweet friends!  Whether you are a new friend, or someone who has been with us on this journey for quite some time, I (Tracy) pray God meets you right where you are. It’s not by mistake God has brought you to these pages. I pray you feel God’s loving, warm embrace upon you as your eyes and heart absorb what He has for you.

Depending on your perspective, this topic might stir a host of emotion. You could be enthusiastic about the idea of intimacy.

If you’ve had tragedy in this area, you could be terrified at the mere mention of the word.  Please don’t check out if that’s you.  Hang in there. Let’s see what healing and restoration God desires to bring to your life. You are BRAVE, sweet one!

Perhaps you’re somewhere in the middle, a little indifferent to the thought of intimacy.  Maybe you’re unaware there’s a snag in beliefs you have long held as truth.  Maybe what you’ve believed for a lifetime isn’t what you once thought when you turn beliefs over and see what lies beneath.

How do we grow in intimacy? (Tracy Stella)Intimacy can be beautiful. Pure, sweet, love extended to our marital partner. The counterfeit, worldly version can leave us wanting more. Because there is more when we’re rooted and grounded in Christ’s love.

Truth be told, as we tossed out the idea of writing on this topic, some of the FACETS team was more than a little apprehensive. So, if that’s how you are feeling, know that you are not alone.  There’s comfort in that thought, right?

For me personally, I embrace the idea of intimacy when it means intellectual connection, when it means experience of fun things together, but sexual intimacy stirs up a whole pot of feelings that, in some regard, my initial internal response is to run.

Life experience used to tell me men wanted one thing and my job was to give it to them.  I deeply desired someone to love me, but struggled with the idea I was even worthy of love.  The more years under my belt, the more deeply engrained those lies became. I grew to believe I was only as valuable as how I made the other person feel.   And because I allowed my misguided attempts at love to guide my decisions, sadly, it was a self-fulfilling prophesy.  Very often I attracted the wrong type of man, the one who only wanted to use me for what I could give him and then move on.

Not everyone in my life fell into that category, but many did.

This internal belief only served to create a deeper root of insecurity. I put a lot of pressure on myself to look a certain way, to do certain things – performance more than genuine, intimate connection.

If someone could have looked inside my heart, they would have seen a grieving young girl that grew into a grieving, love-starved woman.  As years progressed, I became more and more broken.  I became what I thought I was worth.

If we don’t value ourselves. No one else will either.

I also possessed a lot of self-sabotaging behaviors.  It all came down to me feeling not good enough, so I’d engage in behaviors that were sure to prove my theory true.

At some point anger set in as well.  I was mad about how I’d been treated, about the things certain people said or did. There were deep scars that served to scream at me. Unworthy! Unlovable! Not enough!

I was raped at a party and disassociated from the memory for a long time, even though I had attempted suicide because of that incident.  There’s a cumulative effect of life’s trials. All the layers of mine had added up to despair.  I was in a relationship with a “good guy”, but after the rape incident, my body and my mind couldn’t carry the weight of it all.

I sabotaged the relationship, because of the depths of depression I was sinking in.  It was suffocating, and I wouldn’t have been able to even tell you why.  Only my journals revealed the truth. Years later, when I read the words I’d written long before my eyes could handle reading them, I sighed a sigh of relief. Somehow, things began to make sense.  Not crazy. Deeply wounded and in need of God’s loving, healing hands that never hurt. His embrace always sweet. Pure. Innocent. Love.  Good intentions from the day He created you and me in our mother’s wombs.

Another journal from 3rd grade revealed inappropriate adult attention from a neighbor.  I wasn’t sure if my mind was making it up and reading too much into the words I saw in my “little girl” journal. I was able to verify through someone else who also spent a lot of time with this individual that he had done inappropriate things to us both.  As sad as that made me feel for the little girl who used to be me, I was grateful for the puzzle piece to my story.

When we’re ready for the details, they can bring clarity and relief.  These insights can’t be rushed or provoked. I believe it’s all in God’s good timing. He shows up as truth mixed with love when we have the capacity to see it, to process it without being undone because of it.

As part of my story, I had an abortion. The unknown trauma that decision caused me came to light a number of years ago (and decades after my decision) when God brought me through a healing journey. I received His forgiveness and was given the opportunity to grieve the loss of my child. I’m glad eternity is long. Time will give us the chance to get to know one another while worshipping Jesus together.

God is merciful to forgive repentant hearts from things we may think are beyond His reach.  Even more beautiful? His grace takes our worst sin and works it together for our good.  Sharing about my bad decision has helped others to make a good one. Each child’s life saved because sharing of story is a picture of God’s grace. It’s LAVISH, my friends!

Sex used to be my misguided attempt to give and receive love. I really had no concept of what genuine, sacrificial, Christ-shaped love looked like. I thought if I used my body to appeal to men they would love me.  Instead, I was so often left feeling unloved and rejected (even if the relationship were longer). I came to believe my worth and value to a man was calculated by how I made him feel.

This and probably a scroll’s worth of sin I brought into my marriage.

My life has shaped me, but it doesn’t define me.  Christ does!  For you too. Nothing you have done, nothing that has been done to you, is beyond His redemption.

His blood covers my sin and shame. In fact, He blows those things to smithereens. It’s one of the reasons I’m genuinely grateful to God for what He has done in my life.  His grace is the only reason I can write about my past without feeling condemned by it.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.─Ephesians 4:32

I have been forgiven much. I had to forgive much. God’s grace helped (and helps) me to not only extend forgiveness but receive it as well.  When you have spent a large chunk of your life feeling unworthy, Christ’s grace makes sure you believe you are.  Worthy of forgiveness. Worthy of love. Worthy of His time and undivided attention. Worthy of so much more than what we think or imagine.

He wants us to run to Him with our wounds, to rest secure in His arms.  He is Counselor. He is Physician. He is Friend.  He is our Husband. As children of God, we are His bride.

When you have a past as bumpy as the road I’ve travelled, the only way to feel worthy of the beauty and grace that is God and all He has for us is by losing ourselves in His immense love.  If you’ve never experienced the love of God, I pray you are open enough to the idea of Him to receive it. He is Beautiful. Pure. True. Untainted.

He gives us power and strength to peer into our past for the purpose of a bright, beautiful, and hopeful future.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”─Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Even if you don’t believe you are worthy, even if you don’t believe those words could be true for you, if you have only a morsel of hope and belief they are true for you, that is enough. I pray God grows your belief into the fullness of reality that you are worthy. Valuable. Priceless and treasured.

I know this is possible, because He took this once broken woman and gave me a hope for my future. My life is good, pure, sweet and true, because I’m following the One who is Good, Pure, Sweet and True.  He brings peace, and love, healing, and redemption.

He makes all things beautiful in their time.

He has made everything beautiful in its time. He has also set eternity in the human heart; yet no one can fathom what God has done from beginning to end.─Ecclesiastes 3:11 NIV

Friends, we can’t fathom the goodness God desires to give us here on earth and for all eternity.

He does give us glimpses.

God gave me a new vision of love and marriage when He brought Sam into my life.  From my past and the way I used to create favor with men, God didn’t allow me to use those tactics.  He wanted Sam and I to do things differently. I’m so grateful for that!

Because Sam and I weren’t relying on physical intimacy, we created genuine intimacy. I do believe other than God, he knows me best. He knows me better than anyone else ever has.  And sometimes he even knows me better than I know myself.

Because we didn’t rely on physical intimacy, I had no choice but to use new tools (mostly a dependency on God to help me walk out a Christian relationship). I prayed God would help me. And He did. And He does.

When there have been challenges Sam and I have had to navigate, as are inevitable in life, we have a strong foundation. Our relationship is built on Christ, the solid rock on which we stand. From that vantage point, His loving hand strengthens and encourages us to continue forward in this loving one another well thing. Really. Truly. Deeply. Flawed and imperfect, but genuine and real. My mask is off. I’m me and I hope he always feels he can be Sam.  In the world we might not always be able to wear our heart on our sleeve, but I hope with one another we always will.

Merriam Webster’s definition of intimacy says intimacy is:

  1. marked by a warm friendship developing through long association
  2. suggesting informal warmth or privacy
  3. engaged in, involving, or marked by sex or sexual relations

In aggregate, these make for a brilliant, wonderful marriage. We need friendship first through long association. Friendship isn’t confused by physicality and endorphins.  Friendship says, “I see you for who you really are. I like you. I like spending time with you. It could be anything, really, as long as we are together.”

Genuine intimacy also requires warmth and privacy. In a marital bond with Christ leading and guiding, there is a genuine caring and concern. Because Christ lives in us, we possess His nature. He is love. He is trustworthy. He is safe. As husbands and wives, we need to be that for one another.  If there has been a breach in trust for any reason, seek to make restoration. Seek forgiveness or seek God to give it to your spouse. It’s not easy. But it’s possible.  Trust is built over time, through long association. Little by little, brick by brick, the house Love builds can withstand life’s storms.

While God calls me to share openly and vulnerably sometimes (to help others and to bring deeper healing to me), Sam is most often made aware of my heart long, long before I write or speak about a topic. Sam is kind. He is tender. He holds my hurts and heart gently. Over the course of our long association I have learned I can trust him. At first it felt monumental to share pieces of me and my story, like cliff diving into an unknown sea. Now it feels safe to share with Sam.  I can be in my jammies armed with a box of Kleenex, looking a hot mess and know that his heart is for me.

Honestly, the physical nature of our relationship is hardest for me. There’s much hurt and brokenness there on my part, distortion of what is pure, lovely, and true.

God created sex. Satan tainted it.  God has grown me to look at sex more through His eyes. At first it was a lot of the “thou shalt nots” being given─not from a distant, dictating God. Guidance given from a loving Father who only wants what’s best for me.

If you don’t know Him or just need reminding,

God wants what’s best for you!

For awhile, I had a hard time distancing myself from memories I didn’t want to linger.  I didn’t want reminders of those experiences determined to try to define me.  The enemy loved to torment me with those thoughts and doubts. But God brought deliverance and freedom. Years in God’s Word.  Years in the school of the Holy Spirit, being comforted by Him and reassured there is no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus. Receiving His love and healing. Helping others. These all served to set me free.

Christ gave me freedom. And when I need reminding, He gives me freedom. Sometimes he brings me to new depths of freedom, each time less to hinder me.  Growth in the soil of God’s goodness.

God helps me to experience sex as intimacy, not as an act.  Acting I was good at. Intimacy I’m growing to become good at. It doesn’t happen over night, it happens in increments.  Imagine a bucket on the beach. Little by little you fill it with sand. Eventually it is full. Eventually it overflows. Intimacy is like that.

If you have a story like mine, intimacy isn’t easy.   But it if you have a story like mine and God is in the equation, intimacy is possible.

Jesus looked at them and said, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”─Matthew 19:26 NIV

Jesus looks at you.

Jesus looks at you and says, “With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible.”

Lord, help each person whose eyes read this to fear not, to know that You are with them. Help them to be not dismayed. Help them to know You. Strengthen each one. Help them and uphold them with Your righteous right hand.  In Jesus’ name, amen!

“Fear not, for I am with you;

Be not dismayed, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you,

Yes, I will help you,

I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.”

─Isaiah 41:10 NKJV

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Signature Image: Tracy Stella

 

Categories // Blooming in Marriage, Forgiveness, Freedom, Friendship, How to Love When It's Hard, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // abortion, beauty, Depression, Ecclesiastes 3:11, Ephesians 4:32, forgiveness, Freedom, Friendship, Grace, healing, hope, Intimacy, Isaiah 41:10, Jeremiah 29:11, Love, marriage, Matthew 19:26, Mercy, Purity, Rape, Redemption, Revelation, Safe, Safety, Sexual Trauma, sin, Suicide, Trust, Worth, Worthy

Who Do You Love?

02.06.2018 by Tracy Stella //

Don’t instantly check out as you see our topic at FACETS this month. Yes, it’s about love. But perhaps God wants to speak something new to your heart through the words He has given Kim, Jennifer or myself. And you’ll definitely want to see what my friend Zolei shares on the topic of love in week four!

February. The month of love. But what if we aren’t in the mood? Sometimes that’s the case. Right? We know we should love, but we just don’t want to. We know we might be missing out, but we might avoid the muddy mess of it all too.

Who do you love?

Do you even want to? Or are you sick of trying? Maybe all you want to do is snuggle up with your dog. Show me an animal lover and you may see someone who’s been deeply hurt and finds it difficult to trust humans. (I may know a thing or two about that.)

Let’s face it. Love can be stickier than cotton candy. Love can melt our heart faster than chocolates left in the car on a hot summer day. Love can be messy! Love can leave a stain that makes us think to ourselves, “Perhaps it’s easier to just steer clear.”

Maybe your line sounds something more like this, “I’ll just deal with this empty, dry, loveless relationship until death do us part. I’ll endure it, but I won’t enjoy it.”

Friendships that sour and leave a bitter taste in our mouth. Loves lost, but not before first leaving us scarred. And scared. Familial love that didn’t look like it does in the bedtime stories of children safely nestled in their beds, mama and papa tucking them in before the child drifts off in dreamy slumber.

Love is not always easy. Love is more likely almost always hard. Love is work. Love isn’t the stuff of romantic comedies or fairy tales. Love is the stuff of in the trenches digging in and doing what’s right.  And getting up the next day and putting loving well on repeat, not missing a beat. When we get it wrong? Fess up! Ask for forgiveness. A – pol- o – gize

Love is leaning in with intention. Love isn’t leaving when the going gets tough. I didn’t always know that.

My hope and prayer for everyone who finds this blog is that you realize while love isn’t easy, it’s possible and even necessary. Please, please don’t close yourself off to the idea of love. It’s not too lofty for anyone.  It’s not too late.

Hope for authentic love is not lost. Whether that love you so desperately desire is for a partner, a friend, a child, a parent, or someone else, love is possible for you.  But it will take some work on your part. I’ve done some work in that area myself.

But lean in to hear this…

It was worth it!

The hard work was absolutely worth it! I’ve walked through some love land mines. I could have been blown to bits, but I’m here. Still breathing. And smiling. Most days, heart full. And when it’s not, I run to Jesus and let Him fill me with His love, so I can operate from a place of confident boldness. I am loved.

I am loved! Which makes me able to love!

You are loved! Which makes you able to love!

If you haven’t received Christ as your Lord and Savior, you are loved!

But!

But you don’t have access to His power and ability to love others well. It’s only when we accept Jesus into our hearts that we are given the Holy Spirit (God in us). We don’t have strength to love the difficult people in our own power, but in God’s we can.

And you aren’t in your pursuit of love alone. God is love. God desires love for all His children. We were made to love, because we were made in His image.

If you want to receive Jesus into your heart, pray a simple prayer of surrender. “Jesus, I want to know You and Your love. I want to know how to love others well. I want and need Your power to do so. I give You my heart. Please help me to receive Your love and guidance for my life. Help me always to remain in Your love, power, and soundness of mind. Help me to be bold in my faith and in my love for You, myself, and others. Give me confidence and the ability to overcome my fears. In Jesus’ name, amen!”

Most of us are probably very familiar with the greatest commandments to love God and love others as ourselves. (See Matthew 22:36-39)  Love coded into our DNA by design. When we go against love, we go against the grain of God’s plan for each of our lives. If we resist love, we resist God Himself.

By the way, one can be IN a relationship but not act in a loving way. I know we are all aware of this, but it’s worth mentioning. Just because we are partnered up with someone romantically or just because we are in a friendship with someone, doesn’t mean we are in a love relationship with them.

We can treat our friends less than loving. We can be unloving to our spouse. We can show our worst side to those closest to us as we show our sparkly, shiny selves to those further off in the distance.

I’ve been in ministry long enough to see, one never knows what goes on behind closed doors.  If that’s you, sitting behind a door that you’d be completely embarrassed if someone peered behind and saw what really goes on… love is not too late for you either. Promise! It won’t be easy, but it will be worth it. Redemption ALWAYS is!

No relationship. No disillusioned love is beyond hope. Hearts still beating? Hope’s still lingering!  If there are old wounds to clean up, do so. It might be more work than if you were a newlywed, but God will help you. HE IS BIG ENOUGH! Don’t give up! Don’t throw in the towel when God is fully capable of cleaning up any mess we make!

Bounty may be the quicker picker upper, but God is the master cleanser and restorer. He not only cleans up. He makes new. Somehow better than when we first began if only we’ll hand our mess over to Him, and follow His lead as He helps us love well.

How do I know?

He’s done it for me! And He does it for me! (Because it’s a daily thing.)

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.─2 Timothy 1:7 NKJV

Some of you may know my story, that I was married before – and lost everything. Everything. But in the losing of─well─my life, I gained everything.

The gain was instant and gradual all at once. I was flooded with God’s love. A love so genuine, sweet, and authentic that it felt foreign – false almost. You know. Too good to be true. Only thing is … it wasn’t. God was (and is) good for His word. That felt foreign. Someone I could trust. But I could. And I can.

In the beginning I was terrified to trust God, or anyone else. I’d always trusted myself – trust your gut – until you find out that’s not the most reliable source.

I was so afraid to love, I almost lost it!

FEAR LIMITS LOVE

My fear of getting hurt by another human almost left my heart walled off from receiving a sweet gift from God. I have been gifted a wonderful second chance in a godly marriage.

But it almost didn’t happen.

Almost seven years down the line, I’m glad it did! And I’m so glad God understood my fear (and its source) and in His mercy and goodness made His plan for my life abundantly clear.

The Scripture above says God didn’t give us a spirit of fear.

Fear is from the enemy who wants to keep us isolated and alone. Love is from God. He is the source of our love. He gives us the power to love, on the days when it’s easy. And on the days when love takes work.  Real life is made up of both.

Sometimes we can’t love in our own power. Those people that grate on our very last nerve. Like nails on a chalk board. The ones that aren’t easy to love are still lovable in God’s sight. Who do you love? You love them too!

That’s the kind of love we can’t do in our own power. That’s supernatural love.

Our scripture goes on to say God gives us a spirit of power. His power. We’re not in the business of loving the prickly ones in our own power, but His! I may have muttered quietly in my head a time or two, “Help me love this one well, Lord. Because if it’s up to me …. well, I’m pretty sure I’m going to blow it!”

An excerpt from the Message 2 Timothy 1:7 says, “God doesn’t want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible.”

“God doesn’t want us to be shy with his gifts, but bold and loving and sensible.”

When’s the last time you thought of love as being sensible? A gift? Perhaps. Bold? Sure. Sensible? Huh?

Sensible love is a gift.

Long after the adrenaline subsides and relationships settle into pleasant companionship, relationships of genuine concern, love roots in sensible plots of land. Flowers bloom from season to season. Soil fertilized well. Relationships fortified. Forged strong from some rough patches weathered well together. Fragrant blooms of fresh cut flowers still … because love and life aren’t assumed but invested in.

Who do I love?

I love God. I love others. I love myself, because not doing so is a form of insecurity and pride that is rooted so deep in fear that can strangle out love’s possibility for growth.

And I want love to grow.

So I’ll weed and water, preparing the soil of my heart to be ready to give and receive love.

In God’s power as we love others, we are not only giving gifts. We are receiving them too.  For almost certainly what we plant, we will harvest. The more love we plant and nurture, the more love will grow, and the more we will receive. Pressed down. Full to overflowing.

I pray bushel baskets of love filled to capacity for you, sweet friend! I pray you are able to access God’s power (because it’s there for the asking) to love others well. And I pray when you do the hard work of loving others well, you see a bountiful harvest. And if you’ve been deeply hurt and are afraid to love, really love, that you are given a boldness and discernment from God to know who to trust with your heart. I pray God gives you spiritual eyes to see who will love you well. (Because God showed me and He was oh-so-right!) In Jesus’ name, amen!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Categories // Blooming in Marriage, Difficult People, Faith, How to Love When It's Hard, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // 2 Timothy 1:7, fear, gift, Love, marriage, power, sensible, sound mind, Trust

Difficult People: Turkeys in Disguise

11.28.2017 by Hyacynth Worth //

Hi, friends! I (Jennifer) have the privilege of introducing you to my good friend, Hyacynth Worth. You should know that her heart is precious to me. She blesses me with wisdom and her friendship. If you want to know more about her and her beautiful family, please visit her blog HERE. She is a wealth of relational and parenting wisdom (especially for adoptive families)! I hope you enjoy her thoughts this week.

What do you do when you have a giant turkey in your life?

If it gobbles like a turkey, struts like a turkey, and acts like a turkey—chances are it’s a turkey.

I asked my ten year old son, who hunts turkeys, if that’s true. He looked at me like I was having a moment and said, “Well, yeah. Pretty much, Mom.”

I think we have a tendency to feel this way about our relationships, too; we understand the obvious turkeys in our lives, as they tend to be the birds who cause us to inwardly cringe at their outward displays of foolishness.

Note: if you feel like you need some extra turkey identification work in the area of relationships {not the field}, the book of Proverbs details the actions of the obvious turkeys in our lives. They are the people who don’t know what they don’t know, and you can tell by the way they gobble— errrr—talk and walk in ways of obvious foolishness.

“Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.” Proverbs 12:15 NLT

“The wise don’t make a show of their knowledge, but fools broadcast their foolishness.” Proverbs 12:23

But what about when it doesn’t talk or walk like a turkey because it has all the right words and so many of the right moves of a bird of another feather … and yet we’re still left with the keen sense that what we’re staring at what has got to be a turkey disguised as a well-adjusted bird because dude’s acting like a fool in some specific area or areas of life and doesn’t even seem to know it?

That’s where relationships get even trickier — when we’re trying to love well and interact well with the not-so-easily identifiable turkeys in our lives and wondering why the interactions don’t seem to be going so well.

The turkeys disguised as a well-adjusted bird with all the right moves and all the right words but mismatching lives are the ones who say the right things and seem to have a pretty stately walk, yet act in ways that would point to the contrary. I’ve heard them referred to as biblical fools. Mostly, though, when I think of these kinds of turkeys, I think of the Pharisees with whom Jesus had so many words about their hard hearts.

The Pharisees.

The most learned men of their time with a deep understanding of the scriptures and the most knowledge of God.

Men who opposed the healing of suffering people because no work was to be done on the rest day.

Men ready to cast stones on a woman caught in adultery as though they had no sin of their own.

Men who valued the rules over the restoration of relationships.

Men whose hearts are often a lot like my own.

It’s tempting to look at the pharisees and under our breaths think, “Idiots. Of course, relationship and restoration of relationship is more important than the rules.”

But these men likely knew full well the stories of their ancestors who did things like step out to brace the falling ark of the covenant and then were immediately killed for violating the law of God concerning the transportation of the ark.

These are the men who play by the book because the Book was what they knew.

They didn’t understand the depth of relationship God seeks with us; neither did their previous generations, which is why the nation of Israel needed prophet after prophet to speak God’s truth and then eventually Jesus to come and show them God’s heart.

They are a bunch of turkeys in disguise. And as believers in Jesus, haven’t each of us been, too?

If we’re each committing to honesty, I think we can all say we’ve all been turkeys in disguise.

Have you ever caught yourself reacting to a circumstance in a way that completely confuses you? For me, it’s when I’m counseling one of my kids in a direction of life and then I find myself struggling to take my own advice.

At one point during his ministry Jesus says that we ought to be more aware of the planks in our own eyes than the specks in our brothers’ and sisters’ eyes. In my house, we call this, “you do you.” Meaning, if you see a speck in your brother’s eye, first check your own to make sure you don’t have a huge log blocking your vision.

Why? Because none of us can change another person’s heart through lectures or force or punishment or shaming. Our hearts are truly changed toward God’s heart of love only in response to one thing: unconditional love that’s full of truth and grace.

Jesus remarks that the most important of all the law and commandments is to love:

“One of them, an expert in religious law, tried to trap him with this question: “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:25-40

That second equally important commandment is often misunderstood, so let’s break it down: we are to love our neighbors as we love our selves — as in we are to love them as an extension of our own bodies.

So … how do we want to be treated when we are (knowingly or unknowingly) stuck strutting around like giant turkeys?

We see it in Jesus’ response to the woman caught in an act of adultery (John 8):

“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”

They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”

It’s as if Jesus is saying, we don’t beat down others, we build them up. We call them to a higher living, a higher purpose, a higher way of living more in harmony with how God created us.

So what do we do with a giant turkey in our life?

We resist the urge to roast them and instead tread with them in equal parts truth and grace, much in the way Jesus shows us time and time again. Let’s pick up with Jesus and the woman the crowd wanted to stone after he boldly welcomes he who was without sin to throw the first one.

“Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.

When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

“No, Lord,” she said.

And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

 

Categories // Difficult People, Guest Perspectives, How to Love When It's Hard, Life Tags // Difficult People, God's love, Grace, Greatest Commandment, John 8, Love, Matthew 22:25-40, Proverbs 12:15, Proverbs 12:23, Relationships, truth, Woman caught in adultery

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  • The Blessing of Knowing God
  • The Blessing and the Battle
  • January 2021: The Blessing
  • A Weary World Rejoices: Pondering and Remembering

Recent Comments

  • The Blessing of Knowing God – Facets of Faith on The Blessing and the Battle
  • Maryfrances on The Blessing and the Battle
  • The Blessing and the Battle – Facets of Faith on January 2021: The Blessing
  • Reawakening the Invitation to Dream – Facets of Faith on The Trinity: Intimately Knowing & Growing
  • Rudy Euceda on Finding Jesus Next to Me

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Categories

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  • The Blessing
  • The Blessing: January 2021
  • The Do Over
  • The FACETS Team
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  • The Trinity: Intimately knowing and growing
  • Thelma! Who's Your Louise?
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  • Uncategorized
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  • Who Burnt My Turkey?
  • Who Do You Love?
  • Who Do You Say I Am?
  • Woman of God?

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