What Do I Have to Offer Archives

When All I Have to Offer is Broken

12.20.2016 by Kim Findlay //

This month at Facets of Faith we’re answering the question, “what do I have to offer?”. Tracy and Jen have shared their heart-felt responses, ones you don’t want to miss. Take a moment and jump over to their pages to see how they responded.

I (Kim) was terrified. The divorce was final and I had started the slow rebuild of all that was damaged. I felt unsure, unsteady, and unworthy. But there I sat at the computer, rereading the email for the eighth time.

We’d love to have you back to share the story of the death of your daughter and how you trusted God.

It took a few moments for the invitation to sink in. I spoke at this church a few years prior and shared my story of trusting God after the death of a child. I offered practical tips on how I learned to trust Him. But that was before the divorce.

I started to feel like a fraud as I read. What did I have to offer? My marriage fell apart and I almost did, too. I still cried. A lot. I questioned and wondered and struggled. I talked with God about my pain and loss all the time but didn’t seem to have many answers. I felt broken, damaged, and unusable.

All I wanted to do was to offer God my best. But during that season of my life, my best didn’t feel all that great. I looked around and saw other people doing great things for Him: impacting countries, writing transformational books, and making real differences in peoples’ lives.

And then there was me.

Broken. Grief-filled. Wrestling and struggling with life. Not all the time, of course. But it seemed every time I took a step or two forward, I got knocked back three or four.

I sat in front of my computer, hoping the answer would jump out from between the lines. I wanted to be honest — with Him and myself. Yes, I wanted to offer my best, but the more I thought about it, the more I realized what I really wanted to offer was perfection.

I wanted to show God the pristine pictures and put-together poses. I didn’t want to show the frustrations and painful places that still plagued me. I didn’t want him or anyone else to see all those broken pieces I kept trying to sweep up and hide.

Perhaps you can relate?

The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7b, NLT

My heart was broken, but it was still beating, even begun to heal. During those dark days I started to hear a quiet voice whisper soothing sounds to my soul. I experienced God in ways I’d only tasted before.

I love you.

But if you only knew . . .

I do know, and I love you. Nothing will ever change that or take you away from me.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow—not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below—indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord. Romans 8:38-39, NLT

But what about the time I . . .

Not even that.

But I ‘m scared. What will people say?

It’s okay. I’m with you. I will never leave you.

I have nothing to offer you, nothing good. My life is full of broken pieces.

That’s enough. Trust me with them. Watch what I can create.

Now all glory to God, who is able, through his mighty power at work within us, to accomplish infinitely more than we might ask or think.” Ephesians 3:20

Broken pieces. A shattered heart and failed marriage. A life filled with sorrow and years of disappointment. Oh, and tears — gallons of tears cried in the shadows. To the world, my life looked like a mess, but to God? Well, to Him, there was value. There is value.

You keep track of all my sorrows. You have collected all my tears in your bottle. You have recorded each one in your book.” Psalm 56:8, NLT

Like a child offering a precious gift to a loving parent, I held out all my broken pieces and offered them all to Him. I named each piece and placed them at His feet. When I was done, I felt empty, yet somehow at peace. I trusted He would remind me of His love and grace on days I tried to take my offering back and on the days I felt strong.

I chose to trust He will do what He said and create something beautiful out of the ugly mess. So I hit reply to the email and said yes. After all, I had much to offer.

And so do you.

I waited patiently for the Lord to help me, and he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the pit of despair, out of the mud and the mire. He set my feet on solid ground and steadied me as I walked along. He has given me a new song to sing, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see what he has done and be amazed. They will put their trust in the Lord.” Psalm 40:1-3, NLT

Jump in and join the conversation here or over on our Facebook page. We love to hear from you!

What Do I Have to Offer: The Gift of Me

12.13.2016 by Jennifer Howe //

We’re nearly halfway into December, and I (Jennifer) wonder if you’re looking forward to celebrating the birth of our Savior, too. I remember lots of precious moments in my decades of Christmases, but I have favorites: the gifts wrapped in multiple layers. A big box emerged from the tree’s low, ornament-laden branches, and the fun began. At the heart of several wrapped boxes was a small, precious gift. Something that might be overlooked for its small size was given significance and greater excitement in the context of beautiful presentation and heightened expectation over several minutes of opening and opening and opening again.

Creative presentation and the extended opening process can be fun. It takes time to get to the best part, and the heart of the gift is the gift. When I thought about that, my mind wandered to another instance of something precious hidden deep inside. Matryoshka dolls. Nested inside an intricately painted wooden doll “shell” are several more until the smallest one is found at the heart of the last opened doll. It’s similar to the gift within a gift within a gift, isn’t it? I imagine a little girl eagerly opening each one to see where the smallest one would appear.

The gift-opening process and nested dolls grabbed my attention when I thought about December’s topic. I think that, at the heart of who we are, is God-given purpose that includes our entire being woven into a beautiful, partially-hidden opportunity. We’re more complex than the dolls, but not different in our many layers of gifts and talents or interests and passions. Our physical, emotional, and spiritual makeup plus our experiences are all part of the package. And we become the gift, if we choose. We can do that by offering ourselves as a gift God can use in the lives of others. The choice is rooted in our God-given purpose: to glorify God and love Him forever.

When I think of myself as a gift, ideas swirl through my mind. Jack of all trades, master of none. The “utility player” on the softball team. The “quick study” who can figure out or learn most assignments or tasks. The mind with a little knowledge on a variety of subjects (but never algebra or some sciences). Some of us have no single thing we do well with laser precision. (Does this resonate with you?) It’s possible to feel confusion about how we can serve others.

Some talents reside closer to the surface. When my friend needs line editing or proofing done, that seems natural. If my son needs a ride somewhere, the driving is nearly automatic. My education and experience in some areas make gifting myself a matter of decision (willingness). My skill set isn’t challenged as much as my heart to serve graciously. I cherish the “easy” tasks—the low-hanging fruit—I simply have to choose to engage my heart, especially when I’m unaware of the far-reaching effects hidden from view.

When I offer the “gift of me,” I have to assess what God has placed in me (talents and experience), what excites me (passion), and where I can be effective (circle of influence, resources, and time I have). I have to be completely honest with God, myself, and others because I have a heart to have influence and impact in a number of areas. I want to be everywhere and try anything. Then Paul reminds me:

3 For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you. 4 For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, 5 so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others. 6 We have different gifts, according to the grace given to each of us. Romans 12 CSB

We each need to identify who we are in service to others. For me, that can be as basic as knowing my math limitations. It’s embracing my heart for toddlers and the reality of their dependence. I may want to serve my neighbor, but language and cultural barriers should be acknowledged. My passion, education, and experience have real limits. I have to honestly ask—what has God put in me?

Then there are times we ask what God is ready to pour into us. We’ve talked about “big asks” and times we decide to serve others in ways that require sacrifice, God-given strength, and endurance. When we gift ourselves for someone’s blessing this way because we’ve been led to it by the Spirit of God, we get to the heart of the gift, the central part of our heart and our purpose. The gift is more significant because it requires unique sacrifice. The gift is bigger than we can muster (we can’t take credit), and the effect is often more than we can even hope (we couldn’t make it happen alone). When we make our whole self available to God for his power and purposes, crazy-awesome things can happen! I think that’s the essence of loving God with your whole heart, mind, and strength.

“The chief end of man is to glorify God and enjoy him forever” (Westminster Shorter Catechism). That, friends, is our soul purpose in this life and the next. Any gift each one of us gives can line up with that, but do the intentional heart, mind, and strength checks regularly. My purpose is not to proofread, but proofreading can serve in a significant, impactful way. The relationship with the author may be influential. The content of the proofread text may have far-reaching effects. My purpose is not to drive, but the time I choose to chauffeur may impact the life of my son or someone he encounters. The prayer I pray in uncertainty with faith in the One who hears it may be the opportunity God uses in my life and the one I pray for. Each of these gifts I give reside at different depths of who I am, but they are opportunities to serve and bless someone.

We all have a range of opportunities and things to offer. Will you lean in? Will you give the gift of you? I wonder what had God placed in you…

The gift of you (your talent, education, experience, and passion) is a blessing to you in order to be a blessing. How can you line up all of who you are and everything you’ve been equipped to do with your God-given purpose? What do you think? Comment below or at our Facebook Page.

Happy holy days from my heart to yours!

What Do I Have To Offer?

11.29.2016 by Tracy Stella //

What do I have to offer? Have you ever thought that? I have. I’ve responded to the question in several different extremes over the course of my life.

I (Tracy) have been self-deprecating as I thought: not good enough, not qualified, not a good option for God and what He has in mind. Fear and its close cousin, insecurity inhibited my ability to proceed with God’s plan. Over time, I have learned to do things afraid. I’m grateful God has taught me to do so. I don’t need to play into the enemy’s hand and sit on the sidelines watching other people do God’s will. I want to be in the game-His game where He works all things together for the good of those who love Him.

And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.─Romans 8:28 NIV

I’ve learned He will use me in spite of my limitations. Perhaps, He uses me more because of them. I’m miserably flawed even as I am marvelously made in His image. Without Him I’d be a hot mess. With Him I am an heir to the throne capable of all He calls me to. When I waiver in that, He is faithful to remind me.

Remember who you are. You are My daughter. I delight in you. You please Me. You don’t have to be perfect. You are being perfected by Me. You can do whatever I ask, because you can do all things I ask of you in My name. I have not set you up for failure. I may ask you to walk through the fiery furnace as I refine you, but like blown glass you are made more and more beautiful each day you rest in Me. You are moldable, conforming to Me and My will.

I’ve also taken the question to the other extreme: I’ve got this all under control. I’ll just put on my cape and come to the rescue. That response was my standard operating procedure before I knew Jesus. But even after I was saved, I fell into the trap of Tracy as savior.

Both responses are a bad idea.

God forged a different response as I considered What do I have to offer? And in my response, I get to see the growth God has brought in my life for His glory. Transformation takes time. When transformation takes hold, all that hard work is worth it.

As recently as last night when I contemplated this piece inquiring of God where He wanted to take it, He impressed on my heart two things I have to offer.

My presence
My Jesus

Little-did-I-know He would ask me to do that in a big way only moments later. Never mind I had a writing deadline a few short hours away, I was being called into action.

As I sat on the couch with a woman in desperate need of the love and healing power that can only come from Jesus, I knew this is what Jesus referred to when He told me in advance what I have to offer:

My presence
My Jesus

Exhausted, I sat and listened to hard things. It’s never comfortable listening to someone else’s pain, not knowing how to make it better. That feels impossible anyhow─making it better. Some things are beyond a kiss-it-and-make-it-feel-better-I’ll-put-a-band-aid-on-it boo boo. Some things are just bad. Some things are unexplainable, beyond my comprehension. But in sitting listening, soothing where I could, extending compassion, asking questions when appropriate, I can offer my presence. Offering silence sometimes the very best thing.

I can sit there in spite of how tired I am. I can sit there in spite of not knowing what to say much of the time, waiting expectantly for the Lord to give me the words when I am without them. My presence was the gift I could give in that moment.

Giving our presence is costly, but I know God sees it when no one else does. I know He sees the person a sacrifice is being made for. I know He sees me in all of it, and He sustains me to be able to offer my presence. Without Him, I’d melt into a big blob of glass when the heat turns up.

But my Jesus won’t let that happen. My Jesus is making glass art in me and in the one I sat next to on the couch. And into you as well. Blown glass, poked, prodded, heated, and molded into something beautiful.

When people see the fragile glass image, color streaked, obviously stretched beyond comfort yet still holding form even as it is changing form, they get to see my Jesus.

My Jesus is what really matters. When I’ve got nothing left, HE IS WHAT I HAVE TO OFFER. Empty, He pours in so I can pour out. Impossible becomes possible. Hope and healing happen where once there was only rocky soil unable for good things to take root.

The very best thing I can offer someone is My Jesus. He is the very best thing that I must always point to. He makes all the difference in a person’s healing journey. All.

I realize I might be sounding a little like the disciple John in this piece, referring to Jesus as mine. But He is. And I need Him to be.

He’s yours too, able to step into your fiery furnace and create a beautiful blown glass piece of art if you let Him. So I offer to you the best thing I have to offer: My Jesus.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.