Facets of Faith

Conversations about life, faith, and friendship.

Love From a Distance

by //

Hello friends!  Welcome back to our gathering space.  This month, each of us have pondered on the question “Do they know they are loved?” and each of us ending with a different “facet” (haha)… Check back with Jen and Tracy to hear their thoughts, and get excited for next week’s guest, Judy!  I am going to be really honest, this has by far been the hardest post I have ever written. There have been tears, second guessing, broken internet, interruptions, lost writing, emotional exhaustion, more tears, and the list goes on.  I pray that God meets us both here, and our hearts find rest in a time of unrest.

03 2020 Do they know they are loved? Megan Abbott

Loneliness Epidemic

For years I have overheard the idea that loneliness is an epidemic in our society, but I don’t think I have ever truly experienced long-term loneliness.  I have had moments of loneliness, glimpses, but never long-term. Moments when living alone left me feeling isolated, searching for a new community made me miss old friends, or even those times I was filling out an emergency contact at the doctor’s office and I remembered I’m single, and my family is 550 miles away. 

Then this past week happened.  Each day there were multiple updates.  It was like every few hours the news changed, trips cancelled, gatherings over 1000, then over 250, then churches cancelled, and then schools cancelled.  Honestly, by the time we got to the middle of the week, each time I read the news, or got another notification about something changing I started crying. I could foresee the moment when I would be told “you should stay home until further notice”.  And now we’re there. I live alone. No other people. No community. No visitors to look forward to. No trips. Just me and my dog. And without a real end date. This is why I was crying all last week. The prospect of loneliness was ominous.

God Given Community

There is no denying that we were created to live in community.  Start in Genesis with Adam and Eve in community with God. The census and lists of tribes throughout the Old Testament.  The friendship between David and Jonathan. Jesus and His disciples. Think, even, just about the Trinity. God the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  They exist in community as One. So there is no surprise that we, created in God’s image, would so desperately need community.    

My command is this: love each other as I have loved you. Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” John 15:12-13 (NIV)

I often experience God’s love and grace towards me through my friends.  They remind me of the truth when I can’t see it. They get me laughing and bring joy to my days.  They give me hugs at just the right moments, when I am really needing to feel God’s presence. 

So what happens when we are alone? Or we are starting over somewhere new? Or there is a global pandemic, and to best love our neighbors, we practice social distancing? How do “they” know they are loved when no one is around?  The easy answer is “God promises to always be with you” (Joshua 1:9, Isaiah 41:10, Matthew 28:20), but what about the moments when we need tangible community? When God feels too far away, and we need a hug to remind us that we aren’t in this alone (unless you are Jen and hugging isn’t your thing). 

Seen From A Distance

A year or so ago, my friend Alaina gave a sermon at her church where the main message was: “The cure for loneliness is to help other people feel less lonely.” We have to be intentional to love people when we aren’t physically able to be in a room with them.  If you are thinking of your friend, send them a text and let them know you are thinking of them, or that you miss them.  Ask them how they are, and actually anticipate a response. Think about a time when you most felt seen and remembered by a loved one, and do that for someone else.  Love people unconditionally like God loves you. While I acknowledge that the Spirit lives within me and often reminds me of God’s presence, God has done a pretty awesome job of leaving me feeling loved and remembered without physically being within the 6 foot buffer recommended by social distancing.  Pray for the Holy Spirit to nudge you, and then listen when people are brought to your mind.

It is okay, and super healthy, to acknowledge if you are sad, if you are feeling disappointed, loss, anxiety, or even a little scared. I think a lot of us are.  Which means we aren’t alone. If you are feeling lonely, reach out to a friend and start the conversation. If you have friends or loved ones that are living alone, check on them.  Call them and remind them they are seen and remembered. Help others feel less lonely.

When life starts to return to normal for most of us, let’s remember that community still requires intentionality.  Loneliness will still be an epidemic requiring our attention.  Let us grow in compassion for one another, and ask God how we can use that compassion to better love our community now, and in the future. 

Join us on Facebook, or in the comments, and let us know how you are loving your friends and community from afar!

Signature: Megan Abbott

Did You Know You Are Beloved?

by //

Happy February friends!  This month we have been really digging into words that are a part of our identity in Christ, and I (Megan) have really been loving the “Did You Know You Are…?” series.  We prayed together and selected words that are beautiful and sometimes challenging to accept. In the past couple weeks, Tracy shared about being “Cherished” and Jen “Honored“.  This week,as you read the words below, I pray you hear God reminding you that you are His beloved.

IMAGE: Do You Know You Are...Beloved

Whew… so this topic, huh? Here I am, an unmarried woman in her 30s, that has struggled with feeling lovable the majority of her adult life, in the month of Valentine’s Day, writing about love.  Did you know you are beloved? I guess before I ask you that question, I have to think about my answer. In the past, it has been a challenge for me to claim this truth — God calls us beloved.

Face to Face with My Thoughts

So I have this book, a journal really, that is filled with only God’s truth.  It came out of a season where I struggled to even look in the mirror. I felt unlovable. Honestly, that is even a bit of an understatement.  I was challenged by a friend to just keep speaking the truths out loud to myself in front of a mirror until I could actually say them with confidence.  The first time I stood in my room looking in the mirror, I opened my mouth to speak the words, and just cried.  The second day, something similar. Eventually there were days I could speak truth over myself, and other days that I might even believe what I was saying. It feels silly in hindsight to think I couldn’t speak simple words into a mirror.  But the reality of the power and strength of truth, while looking myself in the eyes knowing I didn’t believe it, it was halting. I was face to face with the reality that I didn’t believe God made me without mistake. That He made me lovable.  That if He had made me lovable, I hadn’t somehow destroyed that in the previous 25+ years.

The “Truth” in My Heart

Have you ever been there? Face to face with the reality of what your heart believes?  I did not believe I was beloved. I would speak truth over any of my friends, strangers even, knowing the value God knit into their being, but never could have said the same words about me.  My truth had departed from the real truth.  I’m not sure why. Lack of confidence? A conditioning from past experiences? Who knows. I knew it needed to change, though. 

Fast forward several years.  I found myself in a spot again where experiences led my heart back to “you are not lovable”.  This time, I felt convicted by the Spirit to write a letter to myself from God’s perspective. I knew it was needed, but simultaneously thought it was silly.  I mean, can God really have me write a letter to me, and it not just be my words? After some wise counseling, I sat down with a stack of note cards and prayed through scripture, writing thoughts and scriptures out on cards and lining them up until I saw where God was leading.  I wrote a letter that brought a little healing to my heart. Calling out pains that I didn’t completely know were there, and the loving, gentle, healing truth that God gave us in scripture.

Beloved,

I am your heavenly Father. I created your entire being thoughtfully, uniquely, and without mistake.1

I do not see you as you do — your flaws, your failures, and days of unfaithfulness.  No, I see my priceless, redeemed, and beloved daughter. While you were in that pit of self-hatred and rejection, I CHOSE YOU. I have picked you up from the pit and crowned you with my grace and compassion.

Beloved, I love you exactly where you are today, and I will continue to love you each day no matter where you are. No more, no less.2

I will walk hand in hand with you as your heart is softened and your stubbornness is replaced with my love and compassion.3 When your heart is overwhelmed, I will be there patiently and gently calling you back to my freedom 4.  The walk will have painful stretches, but I see you on the other side, victorious5.

-Your Loving Father

What Does It Take To Believe The Truth?

I think God could write a letter like this to each of us.  One that reminds us how precious we are. That we are chosen.  That he created us with care, with intention, and with purpose.  We are HIS beloved.  

I don’t remember at this point where I heard it, but I remember hearing a message where beloved was intentionally pronounced be-loved.  Be loved. Live as though you believe you are loved. When you don’t feel lovable, or loved, look back at scripture and read the truth to yourself over and over again until you believe you are the beloved daughter of the mighty God.  There is nothing we can do (or not do) to change the reality of this truth.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.Signature: Megan Abbott

 

 

 

 

 

  1. Psalm 139:13-14
  2. Romans 8:38-39, Ephesians 2:4-5
  3. Ezekial 36:26 (NLT)
  4. Psalm 61
  5. 1 Corinthians 10:13, Ephesians 6:13

Is 2020 Feeling Blurry?

by //

Hi Friends! Welcome back to Facets of Faith this fine Tuesday.  I hope amidst all the anticipation of the new year and new decade, you are finding joy in each and every new day.  This month we are sharing how we see 2020.  How do you see 2020?  Take a minute to jump back a couple weeks to Tracy’s post on finding joy, here, and check out Jen’s thoughts from last week on planning for 2020, here.  I pray that as we take on a new year here at FACETS, God will be moving in this community, and encouraging each of us.

How Do You See 2020? (Megan)

Last year I had a word of the year—rest.  It started as finding time to slow down and sit with the Lord without an agenda, transformed into learning about the sabbath, and eventually was something that gave me space for healing I really needed.  When it was first revealed, though, I was honestly a bit frustrated. I didn’t know where it would lead. It was as if the mental movie of my future felt out of focus because the word could either lead a million places, or nowhere.  How did God want me to act on “rest”?

Have you ever been there?  Where you prayed for what God had in store for you in the season, and the answer was just blurry enough you were left wondering, “What in the world, God? Where are we going?” If I’m honest, I’m right there again this year. I have been in a season of rest that feels like it prepared me for a whirlwind season. I haven’t quite settled on one word, but I feel full of anticipation for the new adventures ahead in this year. Do you know what isn’t so good, though, for jumping feet first into a new adventure?  

A walking cast. 

How does this make sense?  They aren’t exactly made for jumping, or running, and I’m not even entirely convinced they are made for walking! Definitely not for speed or excitement. When I was considering new adventures in the new year, this wasn’t quite what I meant. But here I am taking one wobbly step forward at the speed of a sloth.

SO WHERE ARE WE GOING GOD?

When I’m really confused and don’t quite know how to pray, I usually end up in the Psalms. I know this is maybe a bit more literal than it should actually be taken, but I prayed Psalm 119:105 over and over again as I was trying to figure out where God was leading me. 

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path.” Psalm 119:105 (ESV)  

Praying that I would find clarity in His word for what I should be learning about “rest.” I have been thinking back on it, and the same image keeps coming to mind: trying to find my destination in complete darkness.

A LITTLE BACKGROUND

Several years ago I spent a few years living in a small village in rural southern Belize.  There were 254 people, we spoke Q’eqchi, the village was surrounded by rainforest and plantations, and there was no electricity for miles. When the moon was full, or close to full, you could walk around without a flashlight in areas you were familiar with and be alright, but during that new moon time, it was dark. Can’t see the next step in front of you dark. The stars were amazingly beautiful, but flashlights were a requirement for life.

A few things you should know to fully appreciate where we are going: 

  1. My bathroom was a latrine about 100ft from my house, and my water spigot where I could wash my hands or dishes was about 50 feet away in a little shed that also housed a tarantula I named Charlotte and often a giant k’oopopo’ (toad);
  2. The shop in my village didn’t sell batteries so if I forgot them on my weekly trip to the market town, I was out of luck; 
  3. Batteries die much faster when it is over 100 degrees everyday, and
  4. I didn’t often plan ahead.

UTTER DARKNESS

So I vividly remember what it was like the first time my flashlight died and I tried to walk to the bathroom without it.  I also remember the first time I tried to walk down the path using a candle for light. Flashlights light up the whole path in front of you. You can see clearly what you are approaching, and easily find your way. Candles, not so much; they glow in your face. You can see your next step, but not much of anything further than that. I knew exactly where my water spigot was in relationship to my house, but I had no idea where Charlotte would be. When I had a candle, it was one step at a time, and a lot of praying away the tarantulas.    

FOLLOW THE LIGHT

I think walking with God bounces back and forth between taking the path with a candle, and taking the path with a flashlight.  There have been times where I have peace about decisions, a vision for where I am going, and am confident about the path to get there. There are other times that it is literally minute-by-minute. Either way, God is revealing the path as we go, just sometimes He is using a flashlight, and sometimes He seems to be using a candle. I often want the full moon version where I can see everything clearly.  

BY MY VISION

Even the darkness is not dark to you; the night is bright as the day, for darkness is as light with you.”  Psalm 139:12 (ESV)

As someone who likes to understand everything, and really know what the plan is, I struggle with only having a candle light the next step.  It isn’t comfortable. It is hard. It requires a lot of trust. I have read and prayed through Psalm 139 almost daily for the last week. It reminds me that God knows me, He surrounds me, He protects me, and He is going wherever I go. How comforting are these words:

Even then You will be there to guide me; Your right hand will embrace me, for You are always there. Even if I am afraid and think to myself, “There is no doubt that the darkness will swallow me, the light around me will soon be turned to night,” You can see in the dark, for it is not dark to Your eyes. For You the night is just as bright as the day. Darkness and light are the same to Your eyes.” Psalm 139:10-12 (Voice)

I have to trust the One who sees everything to guide me. The One who, whether it is dark or light, sees where I am going, and surrounds me. It is less about seeing clearly where I am going, and more about trusting the One who is guiding me.

REJOICE IN THE PROTECTION

I wonder sometimes what I didn’t see when I was walking to the latrine, or the water spigot, or to my neighbor’s house down the road after dark.  Even with the flashlight I only saw what was lit by the flashlight or candle. I saw what I needed to see in that moment. Sometimes I wonder what all I didn’t see. Men went spear fishing in the river and hunting in the bush in the middle of the night. For a period of time, there was a jaguar that was coming into the village and stealing chickens and pigs from my neighbors pens. Can you imagine if I had seen it all? Every tarantula, person, snake, rat, jaguar... everything that could possibly have crossed my path? Ugh, I never would have stepped out of my house.

STEP BY STEP WE MOVE FORWARD

So let’s back up to the word for the year.  I’m not sure what yours is, but mine is something related to anticipation (which is actually kind of funny considering it implies some sort of unknown is involved, I think I just found my word).  What if God revealed today everything we were going to experience or learn throughout the year related to our words in one moment? Would it feel kind of like stepping out of my house in the village if every creature was illuminated?

I am going to pray we can rejoice in taking today’s steps today, and patiently trust God to reveal tomorrow’s steps tomorrow.  Even if they are wobbly and taken at the pace of a sloth.

Thanks for stopping by today. Let us know what word you are walking towards in a comment below, or at the FACETS Facebook Page. We’d love to hear from you!