Facets of Faith

Conversations about life, faith, and friendship.

Where is the Room to Play?

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Welcome to June and a fresh topic.  Join us as we look at the power of play. It’s a gift given to us by God, so we can continue to fight the good fight. Play.  Then pick up your sword and fight, sweet friend.

Sometimes, life hands us a whole lot of serious. Stress, trials, & troubles can bog us down.  Life dispenses circumstances that cause room for concern. But I am learning to hand those things over to God.  He wants us to do what we can and give the rest to Him. Pray. Trust. Be Still. And Play.

For me it’s hard to get to that place of play if I have let fear, worry, or too much of the evening news into my life.  I want to be informed, but not formed by what the world is slinging like breakfast at a greasy diner. It doesn’t always sit well in my stomach. I want the Lord and His wisdom to inform my choices. I want the Lord to provide peace when times are turbulent.

It’s a little ironic the word God gave me in January was JOY.  The year of 2020 vision, He knew what my future held.  He knew I’d need to remain centered on His joy well before I knew how much I’d need it.  During all the trials and trauma of 2020 quarantines, isolation, too much of some people, not enough of others, it has been the JOY of the Lord that truly has been my strength.

For a brief moment early on, I wrestled with darkness and depression.  It scared me.  I’ve walked through that dreary tunnel before. It feels cold and damp and alone. I hadn’t felt that feeling in a long time. In the isolation and unknown of what impact Covid-19 would have on life, I felt vulnerable. I felt the weight. I felt the worry (and I wouldn’t consider myself a worrier).

But the beautiful thing about walking with God is He helps us recognize warning signs. In the stillness, we hear His voice whisper.

“This is the way. Walk in it.”

“Come to Me, My weary one and I will give you rest.”

“Be still and know that I am God. I’ve got this. I’ve got you!”

“Trust in Me. Trust in My goodness.”

“I AM your provider.  (Of all things I might add!)”

JOY in spite of circumstances is a barometer of our faith.

When we choose joy, we show others and ourselves we believe what we say. We believe God is good. We believe God is sovereign. We believe God is who He says He is and that He will work everything (even quarantine) to the good of those who love Him.

When we choose faith over fear, play is possible.

Why is that important?  There are several reasons play is important. We’ll look at a few.

  1. Play is important for our emotional health

As I shared, early on I felt burdened and depressed. I didn’t like feeling out of control. I didn’t like everyone else making decisions on my behalf.  Some I agreed with. Some I did not.  If any of you have ever been controlled in an unhealthy way, you might have felt the same.

But God brought about a perspective shift.  He didn’t let me linger too long in that space, but I was there long enough to realize at any given moment if I disconnect from The Vine (God Himself) I could be back in that head space He delivered me from. It was a good reminder of my need for Him.  He is The Light that drives out the darkness. Always.

God led me to play through blessing others in small ways.  I was like a little child, and it brought me great joy. I actually don’t want to get into the specifics here, but leave room for the Holy Spirit to speak to you directly.

What brings you joy that might also bless others?  How can your hands and heart engage in something you truly love doing that will have the added benefit of bringing joy to someone else?

And when we play, even if it’s a little self-indulgent sometimes, that’s okay too.  When we do the things we enjoy? Our spirit is rejuvenated. We engage with others from a place where play has prepared our hearts and minds to love well. Laughter. Joy. Play. They all have a place in helping us be the best version of who God intends for us to be.  So play, sweet friend. Play!  Play for you. Play for your kids. Play for your spouse. Play for your friends. Play for your community.  They all need your best self. Play is good medicine for your emotional well-being.

  1. Play minimizes stress

Have you felt a little stress these days? God has an assignment. Go outside and play.  (Or stay inside but play.)  Remember recess?  That needs to come back. Give yourself a recess every day.  I don’t know what your recess will look like. Whatever it is, do something you enjoy.

We are worth taking time from our busy schedules, for those teaching kids at home, working from home, being the wearer of many hats these days.

We are worth taking advantage of down time if we aren’t as busy.  Play now so you will have strength later when you need it.

We all know worry doesn’t help. So why do we do it?

It’s a trap from the enemy. Don’t step into it. Step beyond the stress. Step into God’s best by playing with Him.

I needed an outlet that wasn’t work.  My job is considered an “essential” job, so I’ve been working. I have the type of personality that has to be careful not to work too much.  In my stress I could have chosen to strive, to keep on the clock day and night.  If I’m not careful, I can be my own personal slave driver.  But I know these things. God has equipped me. And He gives me tools to help fight that.

If I start to feel guilty for taking time to play, to rest, to just be, to just be me, it’s a dead give-away.  Set that stress aside and play. I do not have to feel bad about enjoying life. Neither do you.

I was finding it hard to play with my rhythms so thrown off.  I felt led to get a guitar and spend time learning to play it.  Whether I become the next Eric Clapton isn’t really the point.  The point is to play.  The guitar is a vehicle the Lord gave me to step away from stress and striving. The guitar was God’s invitation for me to sit with Him, to laugh at all the odd noises coming from this instrument not yet making music.

There was an unexpected added benefit to an app I downloaded to help me learn the guitar.  It had vocal instruction too.  So, of course, I fiddled around with that as well.  The instruction reminded me of the importance of breathing.  With each deep breath I took during play, stress was sloughed off me.

So take a deep breath (literally) and play.

  1. Play boosts creativity and brain power

Have you ever had those times when you are trying to solve a problem or develop a creative concept and you’re stuck?  I have found sometimes my brain needs a rest.  I have to set aside the problem.  If I don’t and keep searching, pushing for the solution, it eludes me even more.  It’s as if the more I search for the answer the further away it travels.  Like jumping into water, the ripples push what I’m trying to grasp to the other side of the pool out of reach.  I made a splash but accomplished nothing.

I’ve learned this in my writing.  I can’t force it.  It has to come. I need inspiration. I need to let it simmer. I can’t grab for it.  If I do, it escapes me. I’ve learned to jot down what I have, walk away, and let the rest simmer without thinking on it too much.

I can’t snatch ideas out of God’s hand before He is ready to give them to me.  He’s growing trust in Him. He’s allowing my brain to find healthy rhythms while providing the creative brain power needed for work, writing, ministry, for life.

After all, He is Creator God and we are made in His image.  He wants us to create. Create families. Create businesses. Create goodness and generosity. Create art. Create life. Create joy. Create. Create. Create.

To be our most creative, we need to let our hair down a little and enjoy life.  Set the work aside. It will be there. God will redeem the time.  That has helped me a lot to realize I am actually far more productive when I DO take time to play.  I could sit and rack my brain for ideas for hours, days, weeks.  Or, I could do what I know to do, go play, let the ideas percolate, and then boom: God’s inspiration comes flowing like a river.

He allows me to play and gives me the remainder when I actually need it. His timing, not mine.

God did this very thing Sunday. Sam and I went for a motorcycle ride (one of my favorite forms of play). God allowed me to see something that heightened a burden in my heart. In the quiet of our ride, God gave me something to write. He entrusted it to my care. As He downloaded various ideas over the course of the day, I text them to myself so I wouldn’t forget. I wanted to write, but I knew I needed to play in order to let it all come out the way God wanted. Play helps us look at hard things without letting them overwhelm us. Impact, yes. Overwhelm, no. God inspired me to write this piece on God’s view of color.

Have you ever went for a walk and came back with a flood of ideas?  Perhaps, you fish or boat.  Time on the water refuels your soul and you come back invigorated, on fire, and so much creativity inside it’s almost bursting.  Maybe you love animals.  They teach you how to play.  They spark laughter and joy.  Their snuggles set your soul at rest and your creativity gets recharged.

Play so that you become smarter and more creative.  Give your brain a rest, will you?

My husband used to train triathletes. They’d train super hard for Ironman events. Do you want to know one of the most important elements of a successful training program to compete in a high level event like this?  A recovery period.  There are times of intense training, coupled with rest.  If athletes don’t rest, it actually negatively impacts their performance.

Same with us.

Are you willing to give your brain a rest to have a stronger performance? That “performance” could be your role in the family, your job, your contribution to the  community, your (fill in the blank).  If you want to do well in life, will you commit to play?

“Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.” And he took the children in his arms, placed his hands on them and blessed them.─Mark 10:15-16 NIV

We can learn a lot from children. We can learn how to enter the kingdom of God.  We can learn to play like children.  We once played well. How do we get back to that?

“I led them with cords of human kindness,

with ties of love.

To them I was like one who lifts

a little child to the cheek,

and I bent down to feed them.

─Hosea 11:4 NIV

 

The Lord was speaking to Israel about His love for them in the passage above.

He speaks to us through it as well.  He leads us with kindness and love.  He lifts us like a little child to HIS cheek.  He bends down to feed us.

What if our food is play – pure and simple play?

Pray. Trust. Be Still. And Play.

Play unto the Lord.

If you find it hard to play, watch children.  See how they interact with their toys and with one another.  Sometimes they’re in their own little world, not a care, creating a tea party, a sleepover, a castle complete with a mote, lava water that melts (aka carpet), or some other creative immersion.  Observe and learn (except the not sharing part … we probably don’t want to copy that).

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Who Needs the Royal Treatment?

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Welcome to FACETS of Faith dear one!  I pray you are well and that you are prepared to hear what God has placed on each one of our hearts as we discuss the need for the royal treatment.  I’m excited to see how God uses our words to shape us into the women we are destined to become.  I felt led to write about beauty treatments this month.  In a time when I’m longing to see my stylist (roots anyone?), some are wishing they could have their nails done, and women want their beauty supplies, it’s kind of funny that God placed this message on my heart well in advance of needing my moisturizer but not being able to purchase any!  Small problems in the big scheme of things, I know. I’m merely making an observation that will make sense as you read.

Do you give her the royal treatment? (Tracy Stella)

Have you ever desired the royal treatment ─ to be pampered and well taken care of? Does an afternoon at the spa sound invigorating?  Perhaps a day when someone else takes care of all the household or workplace responsibilities feels in order.  Who is going to take care of you (and me), after all?  Have you ever wondered, “Why am I called to be the responsible one?” Have you ever felt that way? “What about me? What about me? What about me? Who is going to take care of me?”

What if there is more to the royal treatment than self-indulgence? What if there is great purpose when we appropriately use every royal treatment we are given?  What if the royal treatment is about far more than how it benefits us?

Daughter of the King, how is God calling you to use the royal treatment He has given you to extend it to someone else?

One of my very favorite books in the bible is Esther. Before we get too far down the path, let’s remind ourselves Esther was a woman much like you and me. She’s not a fictional character; she was a woman with great godly character.

She wasn’t born a superhero, but she arose as one.  (More about that later.)

Esther had fears and concerns much like you and me when we feel called into situations bigger than us. Daunting circumstances open doors of doubt.  Stepping forward boldly in spite of fear demonstrates great courage.  But how did she get there?

King Xerxes expelled his former queen. She would not honor his request to come to him and his subjects. He was drunk on wine (7 days drunk), and so were his advisors.  King Xerxes’ pride and counsel from his inner circle abolished Queen Vashti from her position.

The king’s advisors were more concerned about how Queen Vashti’s perceived disrespect would impact the treatment they received from their wives. The advisors weren’t thinking of the king’s best interest.  They were thinking of their own.  A good side note: be careful whose counsel you listen to.

It was no secret throughout the kingdom what had happened to Queen Vashti.  Unless you were living under a regal rock, you would have known she was removed from her royal position.

Think about any pop star fall from fame; that’s what we’re looking at.  If People magazine were a thing back then, Queen Vashti’s face would have been plastered all over the cover.  The headline may have read:

Disobedient Queen Dumped

Nothing secret about this demotion. Not. One. Thing.  If you were in the kingdom, you knew about it.

Enter the young girl Esther.

The king grew lonely and his personal attendants advised him to gather all the virgins throughout all the provinces, place them under the care of the king’s eunuch Hegai, and give them royal beauty treatments.

Then the king’s personal attendants proposed, “Let a search be made for beautiful young virgins for the king. …Let them be placed under the care of Hegai, the king’s eunuch, who is in charge of the women; and let beauty treatments be given to them. Then let the young woman who pleases the king be queen instead of Vashti.” This advice appealed to the king, and he followed it.─Esther 2:3-4 NIV

Of course, it pleased the king, am I right ladies?  As a woman in the modern era, this can be a bit maddening to read, especially if you are unfamiliar with the entirety of Esther’s story.  But hang in there with me.  It gets better.  I promise!

Esther was rounded up with all the other beautiful women throughout the kingdom.  She didn’t choose this fate, yet somehow, she found herself in a beauty contest to win the king’s attention.  If she didn’t, she’d be a woman in a sea of the king’s harem.

I imagine Esther had dreams of her own that probably never involved the king. But if given the choice between holding a position of honor over that of just another face in the harem, wouldn’t it be better to be in a position to help shape the culture of the kingdom?

We women have great influence after all.  Wasn’t that what the advisors were so concerned about with the former Queen Vashti?

When we have position in life, there is opportunity for influence. How we use it matters.

Before a young woman’s turn came to go in to King Xerxes, she had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments prescribed for the women, six months with oil of myrrh and six with perfumes and cosmetics. ─ Esther 2:12 NIV

Esther didn’t have a choice in the matter. She had to complete twelve months of beauty treatments.

But what if those beauty treatments weren’t really about beauty treatments at all?

Think about how isolated and alone Esther must have felt over the course of those twelve months.  You can be in a sea of people yet feel completely alone. She was outside of her comfortable home setting. She had lost her daily routine and her family advisors speaking into her life. She was in this dreadful competition. Imagine the jealousies and insecurities on display with the royal crown at stake. I envision some pretty bad behavior by some. Esther’s time isn’t so different than ours. Competition can create cruelty.  (This is me imagining at least a little of what harem life might have been like.)

Let’s vow not to act in a spirit of competition with our sisters in Christ.  It’s one way we can let our light shine brilliantly. When we are cheerleaders in the kingdom for one another, we all rise a little higher.  Let’s celebrate our sisters!

But you can bet that probably wasn’t the world Esther was living in, with the crown and all that came with it up for grabs.

What if the isolation Esther faced was more about preparation?

There have been plenty of times when God has pulled me away from the hustle and bustle of life. It can feel lonely and quiet, but I have learned over time to recognize those instances as His time for divine preparation, to equip me, for what He has next.

Even now in our quarantine, I am reminded of this for myself and for you.  What is God preparing you for?

In times of separation and isolation, there is preparation.

Even Jesus did this when He separated Himself from the disciples to pray and seek the Father’s will.  (But I digress.)

When the king’s order and edict had been proclaimed, many young women were brought to the citadel of Susa and put under the care of Hegai. Esther also was taken to the king’s palace and entrusted to Hegai, who had charge of the harem. She pleased him and won his favor. Immediately he provided her with her beauty treatments and special food. He assigned to her seven female attendants selected from the king’s palace and moved her and her attendants into the best place in the harem. ─ Esther 2:8-9 NIV

Yes, Esther was away from her family, but already she was walking in the favor of the Lord. She was assigned to the best place in the harem.  She may not have been able to choose her fate, but she was experiencing God’s blessings in the midst of a difficult circumstance.

Again, I think of our current quarantine. It can feel hard, like a fate we’d rather not choose. None of us would have volunteered for these circumstances, yet here we find ourselves.

What has been beautiful to watch is how many have made the best of a difficult situation. You can see God’s favor in their lives, favor in the form of joy, hope, and gratitude.  Personally, I have seen God’s provision and peace and He’s even brought laughter and joy. There was a moment of despair on my part, but then I heard God’s sweet, reassuring voice, and I somehow knew everything was going to be okay.

Lock down isn’t perfect, but it’s perfecting us.

I wonder what God whispered to Esther’s heart as she was quarantined for 12 months of beauty preparation.

In times of separation and isolation, there is preparation.

Sometimes these times of separation show us how we’ve ALREADY been prepared.  God’s in the business of preparing us, even when we don’t think we’re being prepared.  (Can I get an amen?)

Mordecai had a cousin named Hadassah, whom he had brought up because she had neither father nor mother. This young woman, who was also known as Esther, had a lovely figure and was beautiful. Mordecai had taken her as his own daughter when her father and mother died. ─ Esther 2:7 NIV

Esther’s loss of her parents created in her someone different than she would have been had they still been alive. That kind of loss shapes someone.  Yet, she had an amazing family member step into her life in a sacrificial, loving fashion.  You can see that dynamic play out through the book of Esther. You realize how much Esther respects Mordecai when we see her act on his counsel (and thank goodness she did). As we see Mordecai’s actions and character play out, we understand why.  (Read the book of Esther. You’ll see what I mean.)

So, while Esther’s circumstances were not ideal, the trials she faced helped her to stare down twelve months of royal beauty treatments in a contest to win the king’s choice award.

If you are anything like me, times of adversity have forged your character. Difficult times deliver us into our destiny if we allow the Lord to use them to do so.

I read something pretty amazing the other day about trauma.

We have come to recognize that our past can either define us or refine us. Those who are refined by their trauma, who truly end up being better off, are experiencing what scientific literature calls posttraumatic growth. Everyone’s heard of posttraumatic stress disorder, but posttraumatic growth is when people actually use their hardship as a springboard and a catalyst to improve their lives.1

Fascinating!  Posttraumatic growth. Pause on that thought for a good, long while.

Posttraumatic growth is possible if we choose it.  Do you want to know in what context the above quote came from? Assisting sex trafficking survivors! Those engaged with helping survivors with their healing have studied what most helps these women and men succeed after incredible trauma. The answer is simple and hard all at the same time.

Posttraumatic growth occurred because of each ones’ conscious choice to survive and thrive.

We can let our past define or refine us. We choose.

Esther could have played the victim. People would have understood. But that’s not what she chose to do.  In grief’s separation, loneliness, and isolation, she allowed grief to prepare her for her divine purpose.  She didn’t have to have awareness of that truth for it to BE true.

That’s a good word for us all!

Whatever life’s tragedies and triumphs, they are all preparation for our kingdom purpose.  We don’t have to be aware of our preparation for it to do its work. Hindsight often shows us where that has taken place without us ever having a hint it was happening.

In times of separation and isolation, there is preparation.

I imagine Esther wasn’t as demanding as other women in the king’s collection. She wasn’t high maintenance, expecting everyone to cater to her. No. I think her humility won her favor with Hegai, the king’s eunuch.  And because she had favor with Hegai, she ultimately gained favor with the king himself.

(Esther) pleased (Hegai) and won his favor. Immediately he provided her with her beauty treatments and special food…. He moved her and her attendants into the best place in the harem. ─ Esther 2:9 NIV (clarification added)

Esther, just being Esther, won favor. Humility and kindness make a woman more beautiful.

I do imagine Esther being kind, not acting in any kind of entitled way.  We later see that.

When the turn came for Esther (the young woman Mordecai had adopted, the daughter of his uncle Abihail) to go to the king, she asked for nothing other than what Hegai, the king’s eunuch who was in charge of the harem, suggested. And Esther won favor of everyone who saw her. ─ Esther 2:15 NIV

Esther didn’t have to fight for what she needed. She wisely listened to Hegai for his insight into what was best. Because she did, she walked in everyone’s favor.  She WON favor of everyone who saw her. Wisdom and humility open doors we cannot.  Such a great lesson for us all.

Who wouldn’t want to win favor versus having to fight for it at every turn?  We can learn a lot from our sister Esther!

Esther had not revealed her nationality and family background, because Mordecai had forbidden her to do so. Every day he walked back and forth near the courtyard of the harem to find out how Esther was and what was happening to her. ─ Esther 2:10-11 NIV

What’s obvious here is Mordecai’s great concern and care for his cousin Esther. While she was separated and alone, he forbid Esther to talk about her heritage. Mordecai showed great regard for Esther’s well-being. He knew her status as a Jew could cause difficulty in her circumstances.

But do you want to know what’s even more awesome about this withholding of information?

The Lord was preparing a way to safety for Esther and every Jew throughout the kingdom. They didn’t know it yet, but the Lord was well aware that during Esther’s time of separation and isolation there was preparation …. So that an entire group of people could walk free in spite of the king’s decree to kill every Jew in every citadel.

How many times has the Lord prepared you for a future season you didn’t see coming? It’s only in reflecting back that we are able to make sense of it and see God’s hand at work in our life all along. Those are faith bolstering moments!

But Esther had kept secret her family background and nationality just as Mordecai had told her to do, for she continued to follow Mordecai’s instructions as she had done when he was bringing her up. ─ Esther 2:20 NIV

Esther had been prepared her whole life for her calling.  She’d been given wise instruction from Mordecai as he raised her, and he continued to have great influence.  He could speak into her life in a way that made impact on her actions and for a nation.

When Esther’s words were reported to Mordecai, he sent back this answer: “Do not think that because you are in the king’s house you alone of all the Jews will escape. For if you remain silent at this time, relief and deliverance for the Jews will arise from another place, but you and your father’s family will perish. And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” ─ Esther 4:12-14 NIV

That’s speaking the truth in love right there! Being on the receiving end of both truth and love is absolutely part of our preparation.

You see, there was an edict (a law) that was issued by the king to kill and annihilate all the Jews. Esther was fearful to approach the king. Doing so without his calling her to him could have meant her death.  Understandably, she was afraid. But Mordecai did not coddle her. He gave her a challenge instead.

And she accepted it.

Then Esther sent this reply to Mordecai: “Go, gather together all the Jews who are in Susa, and fast for me. Do not eat or drink for three days, night or day. I and my attendants will fast as you do. When this is done, I will go to the king, even though it is against the law. And if I perish, I perish.” ─ Esther 4:15-16 NIV

She prepared through fasting and prayer, and asked others to join her in doing so.

She put together a plan to approach the king.

She was strategic.

She was patient and deliberate.

You can see a woman using great restraint as she carried out her divine purpose.

And because she did, the Jews were saved.

On this day the enemies of the Jews had hoped to overpower them, but now the tables were turned and the Jews got the upper hand over those who hated them. ─ Esther 9:1b NIV

While it had looked like defeat for the Jews was surely at hand, one woman’s courage changed many people’s fate. Esther was made for this moment!  Her preparation saved a nation.

Not only that, her cousin Mordecai was promoted to a position of great influence as well.

Mordecai was prominent in the palace; his reputation spread throughout the provinces, and he became more and more powerful. ─ Esther 9:4 NIV

Because Esther allowed her times of separation and isolation to prepare her, it paved the way for those who’d previously helped her to receive promotion. Mordecai’s wisdom in Esther’s life was expanded to shape that of a nation.

Mordecai the Jew was second in rank to King Xerxes, preeminent among the Jews, and held in high esteem by his many fellow Jews, because he worked for the good of his people and spoke for the welfare of all the Jews. ─ Esther 10:3 NIV

Because a man like Mordecai raised Esther it paved the way for her to see him interact with others as he worked for their good. He prepared her by the way he raised her to work for the good of her people.

Leadership can sometimes feel lonely and a little separated, but Esther was prepared for it. It was her destiny.

Ultimately, she walked in FULL AUTHORITY as God’s daughter, destined to do great things. (Esther 10:29)

It’s your destiny too, friend.

What is God calling you to?  Receive His “royal beauty treatments” in times of isolation and separation. It’s part of your preparation for you and all those whom you love.

It’s your destiny.

Remember, times of separation and isolation are for our preparation if we choose to let them.

Let them!

For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do. ─ Ephesians 2:10 NIV (emphasis added)

“And who knows but that you have come to your royal position for such a time as this?” ─ Esther 4:14b

 …hardships are what cause us to learn what’s really in us. If we quit, we miss the chance to discover what we’re capable of.1

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1 Cooley, Ben. Relentless Pursuit, Fuel Your Passion and Fulfill Your Mission. David C Cook, 2019.