Facets of Faith

Conversations about life, faith, and friendship.

Freedom on the Road to Calling

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Welcome friends! We’re so glad you’re here! This month  we’re talking about freedom and calling, two things Jesus is very concerned about for us and others.  We hope you’ll check in each week to see what He’s placed on our hearts.  We trust this message is His message, and He has freedom planned and purposed for each of us as we engage with Him.  For those of us walking free, we pray a deeper level of freedom.  For those of us still captive, we pray He sets us free through our calling.

Christ has paid the price of our admission to enter through freedom’s gates.  Let’s walk through every gate He opens.

What is a calling?  According to Merriam Webster, it is a strong inner impulse toward a particular course of action especially when accompanied by conviction of divine influence.1

As God’s children guided by divine influence, we have a high calling on our lives. Each of us is placed where we are with whom we are for a reason. Our location and vocation are not accidental; they are providentional.  If God establishes our steps (and He does), each paver we walk upon is there for purpose.  Sometimes, the steps He has us take lead to freedom for ourselves.  Other times, those steps are intended to liberate someone else.  Captives are set free along the way in God’s efficient nature─a bit of me, you, we all at once.

Freedom on the Road to Calling (T. Stella)

Recently, I had a client unexpectedly pass away.  It was like a spiritual slap in the face, a wake-up call.  The volume of my tears was large, and I was in absolute shock.  As I processed my feelings, I thought to myself, “I need to pray with more intention.” I always pray for my clients, but this kind man’s passing made me realize I need to pray more and more specifically for them in light of eternity.  Maybe the person we encounter and pray for never comes to know Jesus. But maybe they do.  What if God brought them to me for that specific purpose? What if He’s put someone in your path for that divine reason too? I don’t want to miss that high calling.

Faith is a personal choice. As believers we need to respect where others are on their faith journey. Force feeding someone Jesus is likely to have the reverse effect. Like a baby being coerced to eat smashed squash, they could spit Christ out because we didn’t let them taste and see His goodness for themselves.  But that doesn’t mean we can’t pray for those God has placed in our path, nor does it mean we can’t try to walk out our own lives in such a way as to create curiosity in others.  Side note:  Jesus gave us free will because He wants us to choose Him. Let’s stay out of God’s way and give others the choice to choose Him. Pray and stay out of God’s way. He’ll let us know if and when we need to take action.

I meet a lot of people doing what I do.  I’m a REALTOR®. To say buying and selling a home is an emotional process is a bit of an understatement. The stakes are high and even if the person’s home sale or purchase is for a happy reason, it can be a bit of a roller coaster ride.  Often my job is helping level out the peaks and valleys.  I love getting to celebrate with clients as I’m let into a very treasured life event. It’s sweet and special much of the time. Tears of joy, laughter, and happy dancing, they’re all part of the calling.  (Who said calling had to be all work and no play?)

What I’d never given thought to before becoming a REALTOR® is the amount of ministry opportunities within this career path God has placed me on.  Honestly, until something impacts us (or at least me) we can be oblivious.  As I got into things, I realized people die and their estate needs to handle the selling of their loved one’s home.  Hard! So hard! Those folks need a compassionate person to sit with them in their grief. They likely need someone to help them make decisions, because they’ve already had to make some pretty difficult ones that weigh heavy on the heart.  They need someone who can help them navigate dark waters, with many people often involved who are all dealing with the loss of their loved one in different ways.  Sometimes, we just have conversation human to human. We can leave the home sale talk for later if need be.  Maybe what’s called for in that moment is a shoulder to cry on or ears that can hear their favorite memory of their loved one.  It’s a sacred space.

What sacred space is God calling you to enter?

God gives me women who have had to navigate divorce and need help finding a home.  I’ve made a personal choice I will not proactively market to women or men getting a divorce, because it feels contradictory to the calling God has placed on my life to help married couples work on their marriage and stay together.  But before I was a believer I did get divorced, and so I can certainly understand many of the emotions my clients experience.  It’s another very hard season that needs to be grieved, even if we don’t realize it.  I try to point them to hope.  Hope helps!  I remember one time I was talking with a client in a vacant home for so long Sam got worried for my safety and came to check on me. I was okay, but the one God had placed before me wasn’t. She needed to be heard and God wanted me to listen.  When He uses bits from our bio, His desire is for us to connect.  Those “me too” moments can make all the difference in the world to someone going through something God already helped us through.

What “me too” moment is God calling you to share with someone in need of hope?

There are joyous occasions, newlyweds in need of a home, excited about what the future holds.  It’s so much fun to help them dream and envision building their life together.  Sometimes, they need advice, occasionally it’s about real estate. (Wink, Wink)  Helping people buy homes, in particular, creates a close connection.  You get the opportunity to know someone exceptionally well through the process.  Along the way in the course of natural conversation, people tell you things, personal things.  I have had the best time getting to know people’s stories.  Isn’t that something Jesus would want us to do?  Whatever you do for a living, maybe God is leading you to ask someone to share their story (even if that feels far outside your comfort zone).  You learn some pretty amazing things about people.  Entering others’ story changes ours jobs from a career to a calling.

How is God nudging you to shift your mindset from career to calling?

God once placed it on my heart to do something kind for a person who had been a bit difficult.  Okay. A lot difficult. I’m glad I listened to that still, small voice.  He knew what that person had been through in life.  I had no idea. Clueless with a capital C.  So, I did this thing God asked me to and it caught the person off guard.  Unexpected kindness created an opportunity for another human being to feel safe enough to open up. A lot. Hearing that person’s story softened my heart faster than melting ice cream on a 90 degree day.  I’d say, “Don’t judge a book by it’s cover.”  But perhaps we should in that if there is difficulty dealing with so and so, there must be a reason. If the outside reads hard, the inside is probably hurt.  Life’s tribulations can lead to prickly people, because they’re just about protecting themselves at this point.  That’s what God showed me.  This person was in deep pain. From that point on, I had a completely different thought process about this person.  They hadn’t changed, but I had.

Who is God calling you to see from a different perspective?  What act of kindness can you engage in on their behalf?

If you like to be in control of things, don’t become a REALTOR®.  This job has sanctified me about 1000 times over!  I have control over my actions (on a good day), but I have no control over anyone else’s.  If you play poker but only have half the hand and have no idea what the other player’s cards are, that’s real estate.  I know things to look out for.  I know what SHOULD happen. But I only get to see my client’s piece of the transaction.  I try to have order and process for the things within my control, but there are a lot of players in this real estate game: buyer, seller, 2 agents, 2 attorneys, home inspector, appraiser, sometimes extra family members, and occassionally interfering neighbors. (Oh, the stories I could tell.)  All those other people and their actions, I can’t control one little bit.

God has brought me (and continues to bring me) freedom in this job.  Freedom from letting my emotions boss me around.  Most of the time I do a pretty good job of that now.  Occasionally, I need God’s grace to rush back in and point me back on the path of freedom.  This job has helped me to trust God on a whole new level. We do what we can and give the rest to God. The things that I know to do, I do them. The things I can’t “make happen” make me pray even more fervently.  Sometimes, I get inspiration and direction on how to proceed.  Sometimes, I’m called to sit a spell and let God do what only He can do.  It is a gift (and a relief) to know and believe in my heart that God’s the One in charge of the outcome.

What’s something within your control God is asking you to take action on?  What is at least one area of your calling God is asking you to relinquish control of and trust Him with the outcome?

Just this week I had a moment where I let fear creep into my calling. It wasn’t good.  I was concerned that this or that wouldn’t happen.  And then if that didn’t happen, then this, and this, and this might happen.  My momentary setback was a good reminder that as much as I want to be like Jesus, sometimes I’m like the leper and need some healing along the way myself.

How does God desire to bring healing to you through  your calling?

Now on his way to Jerusalem, Jesus traveled along the border between Samaria and Galilee. As he was going into a village, ten men who had leprosy met him. They stood at a distance  and called out in a loud voice, “Jesus, Master, have pity on us!”

When he saw them, he said, “Go, show yourselves to the priests.” And as they went, they were cleansed.

One of them, when he saw he was healed, came back, praising God in a loud voice.  He threw himself at Jesus’ feet and thanked him—and he was a Samaritan.

Jesus asked, “Were not all ten cleansed? Where are the other nine?  Has no one returned to give praise to God except this foreigner?”  Then he said to him, “Rise and go; your faith has made you well.” (Emphasis added)

Luke 17:11-19 NIV

 

My prayer is that more times than not you and I will look a little more like Jesus. As we travel along the way walking out the calling God has on our lives that we will never be too busy to pause and “take pity” on someone. We don’t want someone to have to stand from afar off shouting for attention. Like Jesus, He’d want us to be attentive to the ones He places before us.

What if others are “cleansed” because they encountered the love of Jesus through us?  Maybe that means salvation. Maybe that means healing (or the beginning of that journey for them). Shouldn’t we stop?  Jesus was busy, but not too busy to stop for lepers like you and me.

What will we do if we help a lot of people and we don’t always feel appreciated? Remember, the scripture above. Ten were cleansed, but only one came back to thank Jesus.  I’ll speak for myself in this, but I wonder how many times Jesus has done things for me that I never bothered to say “thank you” for. I thank Him, but do I thank Him for everything?  No.

So another person’s gratitude can’t be our motivator if we are Christ’s children. We need to stop because Jesus stops. He stopped for each of us (and He still stops for us when we need to catch up to Him).

What if in that process we are like the leper ourselves?  As we go about our calling and connecting with people along the way, what  if He leads us to someone intended to help bring healing to us? Wouldn’t we hope someone would stop?

As we are going, let’s not forget our high calling to STOP for others.

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Consider spending time with God processing the questions in this piece.  Grab a notebook, pray, write the question, and journal a response.  I pray God will reveal His heart for you and others during that set aside time.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page. (INSERT LINK)

1 “Calling.” Merriam-Webster, Merriam-Webster, www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/calling.

Difficult People: Turkeys in Disguise

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Hi, friends! I (Jennifer) have the privilege of introducing you to my good friend, Hyacynth Worth. You should know that her heart is precious to me. She blesses me with wisdom and her friendship. If you want to know more about her and her beautiful family, please visit her blog HERE. She is a wealth of relational and parenting wisdom (especially for adoptive families)! I hope you enjoy her thoughts this week.

What do you do when you have a giant turkey in your life?

If it gobbles like a turkey, struts like a turkey, and acts like a turkey—chances are it’s a turkey.

I asked my ten year old son, who hunts turkeys, if that’s true. He looked at me like I was having a moment and said, “Well, yeah. Pretty much, Mom.”

I think we have a tendency to feel this way about our relationships, too; we understand the obvious turkeys in our lives, as they tend to be the birds who cause us to inwardly cringe at their outward displays of foolishness.

Note: if you feel like you need some extra turkey identification work in the area of relationships {not the field}, the book of Proverbs details the actions of the obvious turkeys in our lives. They are the people who don’t know what they don’t know, and you can tell by the way they gobble— errrr—talk and walk in ways of obvious foolishness.

“Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.” Proverbs 12:15 NLT

“The wise don’t make a show of their knowledge, but fools broadcast their foolishness.” Proverbs 12:23

But what about when it doesn’t talk or walk like a turkey because it has all the right words and so many of the right moves of a bird of another feather … and yet we’re still left with the keen sense that what we’re staring at what has got to be a turkey disguised as a well-adjusted bird because dude’s acting like a fool in some specific area or areas of life and doesn’t even seem to know it?

That’s where relationships get even trickier — when we’re trying to love well and interact well with the not-so-easily identifiable turkeys in our lives and wondering why the interactions don’t seem to be going so well.

The turkeys disguised as a well-adjusted bird with all the right moves and all the right words but mismatching lives are the ones who say the right things and seem to have a pretty stately walk, yet act in ways that would point to the contrary. I’ve heard them referred to as biblical fools. Mostly, though, when I think of these kinds of turkeys, I think of the Pharisees with whom Jesus had so many words about their hard hearts.

The Pharisees.

The most learned men of their time with a deep understanding of the scriptures and the most knowledge of God.

Men who opposed the healing of suffering people because no work was to be done on the rest day.

Men ready to cast stones on a woman caught in adultery as though they had no sin of their own.

Men who valued the rules over the restoration of relationships.

Men whose hearts are often a lot like my own.

It’s tempting to look at the pharisees and under our breaths think, “Idiots. Of course, relationship and restoration of relationship is more important than the rules.”

But these men likely knew full well the stories of their ancestors who did things like step out to brace the falling ark of the covenant and then were immediately killed for violating the law of God concerning the transportation of the ark.

These are the men who play by the book because the Book was what they knew.

They didn’t understand the depth of relationship God seeks with us; neither did their previous generations, which is why the nation of Israel needed prophet after prophet to speak God’s truth and then eventually Jesus to come and show them God’s heart.

They are a bunch of turkeys in disguise. And as believers in Jesus, haven’t each of us been, too?

If we’re each committing to honesty, I think we can all say we’ve all been turkeys in disguise.

Have you ever caught yourself reacting to a circumstance in a way that completely confuses you? For me, it’s when I’m counseling one of my kids in a direction of life and then I find myself struggling to take my own advice.

At one point during his ministry Jesus says that we ought to be more aware of the planks in our own eyes than the specks in our brothers’ and sisters’ eyes. In my house, we call this, “you do you.” Meaning, if you see a speck in your brother’s eye, first check your own to make sure you don’t have a huge log blocking your vision.

Why? Because none of us can change another person’s heart through lectures or force or punishment or shaming. Our hearts are truly changed toward God’s heart of love only in response to one thing: unconditional love that’s full of truth and grace.

Jesus remarks that the most important of all the law and commandments is to love:

“One of them, an expert in religious law, tried to trap him with this question: “Teacher, which is the most important commandment in the law of Moses?”

Jesus replied, “‘You must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ The entire law and all the demands of the prophets are based on these two commandments.” Matthew 22:25-40

That second equally important commandment is often misunderstood, so let’s break it down: we are to love our neighbors as we love our selves — as in we are to love them as an extension of our own bodies.

So … how do we want to be treated when we are (knowingly or unknowingly) stuck strutting around like giant turkeys?

We see it in Jesus’ response to the woman caught in an act of adultery (John 8):

“Teacher,” they said to Jesus, “this woman was caught in the act of adultery. The law of Moses says to stone her. What do you say?”

They were trying to trap him into saying something they could use against him, but Jesus stooped down and wrote in the dust with his finger. They kept demanding an answer, so he stood up again and said, “All right, but let the one who has never sinned throw the first stone!”

It’s as if Jesus is saying, we don’t beat down others, we build them up. We call them to a higher living, a higher purpose, a higher way of living more in harmony with how God created us.

So what do we do with a giant turkey in our life?

We resist the urge to roast them and instead tread with them in equal parts truth and grace, much in the way Jesus shows us time and time again. Let’s pick up with Jesus and the woman the crowd wanted to stone after he boldly welcomes he who was without sin to throw the first one.

“Then he stooped down again and wrote in the dust.

When the accusers heard this, they slipped away one by one, beginning with the oldest, until only Jesus was left in the middle of the crowd with the woman. Then Jesus stood up again and said to the woman, “Where are your accusers? Didn’t even one of them condemn you?”

“No, Lord,” she said.

And Jesus said, “Neither do I. Go and sin no more.”

 

Holiday Help for Taming Turkeys

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We’re talking turkeys this month at Facets of Faith, and we don’t mean sharing recipes. The holidays are here and we decided to talk about how we interact with those who might get our goat as we gather. Tracy and Jen shared earlier this month. Click on their names to catch up, or sign up to receive our email so you don’t miss a post! Stay tuned next week as we open this space with a special guest. As for me (Kim)? Well, here’s my recipe for taming those turkeys.

She stood in the doorway, drying her hands on the towel. Pressured by the weight of to-do’s, she looked around for her sister. Surely she knew the importance of this meal. Surely her sister knew that she couldn’t do all of the work all on her own?

Her mind checked off the task she just completed as her eyes skimmed the crowd. One down and sixteen to go, she thought wryly. Now where is that sister of hers?

The familiar frustration began to bubble inside. A slight breeze blew in a whiff of the food cooking in the pot. Almost done, she thought. But the places hadn’t been set and there was more food to be made.

Frustration turned to irritation. How could her sister leave her in a lurch like this? Today of all days? She was just as excited to have such special guests at her house; she wanted everything to be perfect.

She caught a glimpse of her sister’s hair. There she was! Ruffled and flustered, she headed over, determined to give her sister a piece of her mind. How dare she . . .

Oh, she was with him. How could her sister just sit there? Entranced. Enthralled. She caught another whiff of the food. Any longer and it’d be ruined.

She stepped closer and cleared her throat. Surely that would signal her need for help. Nothing —not even twitch. She coughed. She might as well be invisible. She was about to say her sister’s name when he looked up at her, their most treasure guest. Didn’t he know what a turkey her sister was being? Didn’t he realize how much help she needed?

Before she knew what was happening her words tumbled out in complaint. “Lord, doesn’t it seem unfair to you that my sister just sits here while I do all the work? Tell her to come and help me.” (Luke 10:40b)

Special occasions and family dinners bring out the best in us, don’t they? (insert eye roll emoji here) And when the turkey we’re dealing with isn’t the one we’re sticking in the oven, those special times can sometimes turn into emotional war zones. So how do we handle those people who just seem to push our button at just the wrong time?

I love this story of Martha and her sister, Mary. They real. They’re siblings. And they don’t always get along. Martha wants everything perfect while Mary? Well, she must be the extrovert of the two because she’s always found around people.

Seriously though. Isn’t it great that we can look at Scripture and catch a glimpse of . . . ourselves?

Gulp.

I know. Most of us would like to admit we’re Martha and Martha is doing what is right. She’s scurrying about getting the house and food ready for the party. She’s serving and working and going about her business until . . . she can’t find her sister, Mary. Enter the whining. Can you imagine standing before Jesus and saying, “L o r d . . .”. I liken it to the times my kids would call out my name: “M o m . . .” Each letter drawn out for maximum impact.

Is that what Martha sounded like? Exasperated? Frustrated? Weary?

But the truth of the matter is this —she did the right thing. Think about that for a moment: she called out to Jesus. She didn’t turn to her turkey of a sister and begin to chew. No, she turned toward the One whom she believed could help.

“Lord, help.”

She wanted to get the job done, the dinner finished, and people fed so she fixed her eyes on the One who loves her, and who loves her sister.

And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith.” Hebrews 12:1b-2a, NLT

We, too, can do that when we’re faced with those challenging people sitting at the table across from us. We can shift our gaze from their turkey-behavior (insert what you’re imagining here), fix our eyes firmly on Jesus, and remember there are days when the turkey is us. We can pray for peace to fill the room, for strength to zip our lips, or a supernatural connection that only Jesus can create.

Every person has a story that has made them to be the person they are today. My mom taught me that, and she’s right. Think of the most challenging person you’ve encountered within the last few days. Now take a moment and call to mind what you know about their story. Is there sorrow? Loss? Brokenness of sorts? Has the pain been healed or the challenges resolved?

Would you be willing to step into their mess? (insert blank stare emoji here)

I know. Maybe not. But what if? What if that’s the very thing God is calling you to do this holiday season? What if that conversation at that particular dinner or brunch or party is where God will shine His light of mercy and grace not only on you, but through you?

Yes, Jesus said that Mary chose the most important thing —Himself. But I think Martha learned that truth, too. People are worth stepping into their mess so we can offer the grace and comfort that Jesus has offered to us. Even with those turkeys that might get our goat now and then.

He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.” 2 Corinthians 1:4, NLT

How do you deal with the turkeys in your life? Feel free to comment below or jump over to our Facebook page. We’d love to hear from you!