Facets of Faith

Conversations about life, faith, and friendship.

The Lion and the Lamb: the Beauty in Truth and Grace

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We’ve got quite the line up at FACETS! We have precious thoughts from Tracy, Kim (next week), and you’ll have a chance to read our friend, Kelli Worrall. If you don’t know her yet, you need to! Check back the fourth week for her guest post. I know you’ll love it!

“March—in like a lion and out like a lamb.” Do you remember that from elementary school, too? That was the springboard thought for this month’s topic. Then we thought about the character of Jesus. Have you noticed He is called “the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world” and “the Lion of Judah” in the Bible? These are two of my (Jennifer) favorite names. I notice something about the natures embedded in them. One reveals to me the deeply compassionate and huge nature of Jesus. The other makes me think of a confident, powerful nature. Ah, the multi-faceted nature of God! As the team settled into the topic, we wondered how each of us is multi-faceted, too.

Which of God’s character qualities can I see in my own life?

Grace and truth. That’s a tricky balance, isn’t it? I can get flustered when I think about these two character traits doing their intricate dance in my life. I’m uneasy about “grace” that I think might squeak and scamper into a corner. I’m personally more familiar with “truth” that dons a black robe and wields an over-sized gavel with a BANG!

But Jesus—

The Word became flesh and took up residence among us. We observed His glory, the glory as the One and Only Son from the Father, full of grace and truth. John 1:14 CSB

Jesus is grace and truth!

When I get muddled in the grace-truth balance, friends remind me of something super-important—our God doesn’t have a wimpy approach to offenses. He doesn’t wink at sin because it damages our hearts and our relationship to Him and others. I’ll limit this post to the category of sin including offenses. (My understanding of sin is richer than that.)

The truth of sin has to be acknowledged. That might make me happy if I had success in perfect living or I felt offended and hoped someone would receive their “just desserts.” But when I’m gut-level honest, I might be overwhelmed by the truth of every known and unknown offense I’ve dished to family, friends, and ultimately my Abba. Then I should be forever grateful for the goodness of truth and grace!

That said, this slice of my life includes a study of the book of Romans. Chapter one is an eye-opener when it comes to truth. I’m reminded that God’s truth will not be mocked.

For God’s wrath is revealed from heaven against all godlessness and unrighteousness of people who by their unrighteousness suppress the truth…They exchanged the truth of God for a lie, and worshiped and served something created instead of the Creator, who is blessed forever. Amen. Romans 1:18, 25

There are consequences for knowing God, not acknowledging Him, and not being thankful: a darkened mind (1:21) and ugly heart. That’s something I don’t want for myself or anyone, but that’s where the path leads. I want to be sensitive to truth and respond well. And I sure don’t want to hide it from anyone who hasn’t been introduced to it yet or might ignore it. But how? I’m going to let that question sit for now—

I’ve received boundless grace from God, and it is the very thing He hopes I’ll extend to others. Actually, it’s more than hope; He commands it.

Be on your guard. If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and comes back to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.” Luke 17:3-4

I’m tempted to breathe a sigh of relief when I see “rebuke him” because it feels like some kind of control after a tough exchange. But letting someone know they’ve done wrong is loving and gracious. After all, offenses should be acknowledged. Then I focus on “if he repents, forgive him.” When someone responds well, there’s a command: forgive. I must! The “seven times in a day” leaps off the page. Grace after an offense—forgiveness—is the gift I’ve been given, and it’s the gift I lavish time and again.

My story, like yours, is chock-full of difficult interactions. Some events may be more extreme or shocking than many women have experienced, but that’s not my point. Our offenses are not fewer or less significant than others’. What’s helpful but challenging to remember in ugly situations is this:

Indeed, we have all received grace after grace from His fullness, for although the law was given through Moses, grace and truth came through Jesus Christ. John 1:16-17

Moses’ law revealed the problem of sin. Through Jesus, the problem was solved completely and permanently. All the offenses—mine and yours, forgotten and remembered—were addressed truthfully (acknowledged) and graciously (the debt to Holy God was settled). Each of us is invited into confession, repentance, and belief (1 John 1:9).

I know this truth. In love, I share it. By grace I want to live out of it with others. Why? Because—

…whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven will also forgive you your wrongdoing. Mark 11:25

My God is no vending machine. And prayer is more than the laundry list of requests, let’s be clear. But a clean heart makes all the difference in connecting heart-to-heart with Him. That’s the prayer conversation I want with my Father in heaven—hearing Him and thankful I’m heard.

And relationships with others? Nothing is better than knowing you are loved at your worst. Sure, we are liked and even loved at our best, but that’s easy. The rough moments mirror the Lion and the Lamb in everyday life, right?

Thanks for reading, friends. What you think about this month’s topic? Pop a comment in below or at the Facebook page. Are you choosing to know truth, reveal it, and be gracious in the process, too?

Signature, Jennifer Howe

How Do You Love A Friend When It’s Hard?

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This month FACETS of Faith dives deep into the topic: How do you love a friend when it’s hard? Good things don’t always come without difficulty. Valuable friendships are worth the fight.

I (Tracy) couldn’t wait for the big event: Valentine’s Day. Our classroom celebration set amongst a stage of scarlet and pink. The scarred blonde surface of my 3rd grade desk proudly displayed my crepe paper masterpiece: a Valentine’s Day mailbox ready to receive love.

Long before the days of Pinterest and the internet, teachers and students relied on good ole fashioned imagination to design and capture creative vision.  Shoe box saved up specifically for that purpose, all we needed was a bit of glue, construction paper, glitter, and markers. Supplies mixed with a vision for a mailbox masterpiece made receiving friend’s store-bought messages of encouragement such fun!

Excitement hovered thick like a cloud as I anticipated the love that would soon fill my little-girl heart.

“Have a Berry Happy Valentine’s Day!”    

“Valentine, you are tutu cute!”

 “You’re awesome sauce, Valentine!”

I labored with much thought. Which friends would receive my favorites? I guarantee my besties would have received the “tutu cute” message (after all what girl doesn’t want to hear she’s cute?). The frilly pink tutu would have nothing to do with my vote for aforementioned favorite valentine. I do NOT have an issue with fashion. None-whatsoever. (Clears throat – Let’s continue before one of my friends calls me on that one and conducts a fashion intervention.)

Oh, if only loving our friends well were as easy as sending a grade school valentine message. Being a grown-up grade schooler doesn’t always allow life to look and feel that simple. As much of a blessing as friendship can be, sometimes it can also be stinking hard. Throw sin and spiritual attack in the mix, and it can get as sticky as Elmer’s glue when the lid falls off and all we’re left with is a glob of milky white mess.

Certainly, the enemy doesn’t want us to be in relationship with others.  The slippery serpent will try to stir up strife wherever he can. As grown-up grade schoolers, we can’t let him. We need to be friends who see through a spiritual attack and make a conscious choice to love ─even when it’s hard.

We need to recognize strife for exactly what it is: an attempt from the enemy to separate us from those whom God desires us to have connection.

That is often enough. See the spiritual attack. Say what it is aloud (even if it’s only to myself). Then keep stepping into the discomfort with the purpose of unity and reconciliation.

Just before Christmas an incident happened with a group of friends. What took place wasn’t so much about them as it was the slippery serpent trying to pierce me with his dagger. He used those up close and personal to unintentionally hurt my heart.

You see, I know them. I know they didn’t mean to hurt me. I know they love Jesus, and I know they love me. I know they have their own hurts and hang-ups (because we all do, right?). They just forgot how the words and the topic of discussion so closely connected to me and to those I love most.

I removed myself from the discussion to protect my heart from hearing too much. I can forgive, but I knew the more words I heard, the harder that would become. I knew God wanted me to look past what I felt were hurtful words and recall who these people really were─and are─my friends who just forgot. They forgot about what feels like my biggest situation…the kind we wrestle with God about and wonder why, until we remember to have faith.

Perhaps, they don’t know how hard I fight not to cower in a corner afraid. How could they, really? They’re not God. They’re not me. They don’t know.

Grace. Because I’ll need it from them sometime too.

I’ll say something I shouldn’t. Not thinking. Not knowing. Unintentional. It happens. It hurts, but it happens.

Remember. Remember why you’re friends in the first place. That helps too. Remember deposits they made in your relational account. My group of friends have made numerous deposits over time. We’ve done life together and accounts have earned interest. Time together will do that. Remember that one incident, even when it feels like a big violation, doesn’t have to mean a friendship has been fatally wounded. Seek God about that.

For me, there was not fatality, although there could have been. I could have stormed out of that house and never come back, but that would have been my inner child winning – the one who wants her way and wishes everyone would understand her woundedness, the one who wishes those close to her would always remember, “oh, yeah, that might sting”. Honestly, I still want that. I want that from my friends and I want to be able to give that to my friends. I know it won’t always happen. I know I won’t always do it. But I can desire it. Sometimes, we’ll remember to be sensitive and gentle in spirit. Sometimes, we’ll stumble along, muddling through and doing the best we can.

Remembering why we became friends with someone in the first place helps us love a friend even when it’s hard. What is at least one thing about her that makes you smile or laugh? How has she blessed your life in the past? How might she bless you in the future if you can move forward? Hold onto those thoughts if you need to make a conscious choice to love a friend who has hurt you. The reward on the other side of the relational hard work? A restored friendship.

Do you want to know what I did? That night, I made a conscious choice to forgive those involved. RIGHT AWAY. I couldn’t hold a grudge. I couldn’t seek justice on my own. I sought solace in my Lord and Savior, because I needed Him to soothe my wounds from words that did hurt. I didn’t deny the hurt. I gave my pain to God, because I’ve learned that on the other side of pain undealt with (for me, anyhow) is anger. I have to nip that one in the bud right away. Instant forgiveness is easier than overcoming a bitter, angry heart.

Forgive fast. The future of your friendship may depend on that very thing. If you don’t need this knowledge for now, store it up for the future: forgive fast and keep those friendships intact, sisters.

As grown up grade schoolers perhaps we can send a few valentines of our own.

“I extend grace, because it’s what good friends do. Be Mine, Valentine!”

“Thanks for deposits made. Your friendship is something I can count on, Valentine!”

“Valentine, I forgive you because our friendship is worth it.”

What valentine is God calling you to send your friends? Love them well, even when it’s hard. Remember, they might have to do the same one day with you.

Happy Valentine’s Day! Love well. Love well. Love well.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Do You Need a Do Over?

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Let me (Tracy) be one of the first to wish you a Happy New Year! In the season of resolutions we may keep ─or not─ we wondered if any of you might be looking for a do over. Will 2017 be the year that helps you live differently than you did before? Will THIS be the year that thing you’ve always done becomes something you never do again?

At the core of things, isn’t that what a New Year’s resolution is?  I desire to do something better, perhaps to BE better in some way.  The whole idea of a do over, or even a New Year’s resolution, seems to be rooted in regret. If only.

If only I could lose that last ten pounds.

If only I could carry out my calling without wanting to check out when it gets too hard.

If only I could hold my tongue when it wants to wag faster than a dog’s tail.

If only I could forget the hurtful words said to me, expunge them from my brain forever.

If only they’d never been said in the first place.

Maybe if only I’d never said them to someone else.

If only that goal I’ve longed to achieve was finally met.

If only the goal didn’t matter so much.

If only I’d never stumble again in the stinky, miry mess of my sin.

If only.

Right about now you may be wondering, what’s so happy about this post ushering in the new year. Hang in there. We’ll circle around like the second hand of a clock clicking around close to midnight. Time will usher in the HAPPY of this message about needing a do over.

Here’s the thing. We all make mistakes. The key is not to live in them, or let them limit the way we live. Each of us has a high calling. We’re called to glorify God, and we can’t do that if we are plunked down in a sea of regret longing for a do over.

When we don’t get it right (and we won’t always), we repent. We turn from sin and turn to our Daddy who loves us in spite of our sinful nature.

We accept God’s forgiveness and we move forward. Because that’s what He wants us to do.  He’s a God who gives us chances. Lots and lots of chances, because He knows He’s in the process of changing us at His pace and through His grace.

Brothers and sisters, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and STRAINING toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus. All of us, then, who are mature should take such a view of things. And if on some point you think differently, that too God will make clear to you.─Philippians 3:13-15 NIV  (capitalization emphasis mine)

The Greek word for straining is epekteinō which means to extend, to stretch forward, reaching forward.₁

We’re not called to reach back and take hold. We’re called to forget about those regrets, to forget about the sin (ours and others) that wants to entangle us. Instead, we’re commanded to stretch forward as if we’re a third basemen trying to get the game winning out. Reach for it. Because it matters.

We’re called to reach forward, because that’s where the prize is located. Our view as mature believers in Christ should be that facing forward gaze that looks to where our Heavenly Father is guiding us. Where we are going. Not where we have gone.

At some point, we need to think differently than the world. The promise in Scripture: God will make it clear to us. He’ll show us the view, the vantage point, He wants us to gaze at a thing from.

What if God is using our lack to show us things about ourselves? What if God is using our lack to show us things about Himself? On both accounts, He is.

What if our desire for a do over is really pointing to something God wants to help us deal with?

I’ll let you sit with that question for a minute.

What if our desire for a do over is really pointing to something God wants to help us deal with?

The song “Blessings” is playing right now in my earphones. What if the trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise?

What if.

Sometimes, if you’re anything like me, it takes a bit to understand a reaction. Why did that bother me so? Why is that thing (or that person) hitting a nerve? What is it about that proverbial last straw that says, I can’t take another thing? It’s not the last straw that set you on edge. It’s everything that has led up to that, layer by layer, until there’s a signal God allows through that says enough is enough.

Sometimes, He’s showing us a need not being met in our desire for a do over.

Certainly, our need for Him in all things. Like King David, we cry out to the Lord.

Hear me, LORD, and answer me,

for I am poor and needy.

Guard my life for I am faithful to you;

save your servant who trusts in you.

You are my God; have mercy on me, Lord,

for I call to you all day long.

─Psalm 86:1-3 NIV

Every day would be a day I’d regret if I didn’t have God and didn’t know I could call out to Him in my need. I have great need for His mercy, grateful His mercies are new every day (Lamentations 3:22-23)─and that I don’t have to wait for a new year to roll around for them to come again.

I love King David and his example. He gives me hope. Even in his sin, he called himself a faithful servant of the Lord. A servant who trusted God. Even in my sin, I can call myself a faithful servant of the Lord. A servant who trusted God. So can you. More of God’s mercy dispensed to His kids who want to do well, but don’t always.

Even while we are meeting the needs of others (perhaps more so) God wants to make sure our needs are being met. If we ignore the signals, He’ll allow them to get louder. It’s part of His merciful plan to turn up the volume.

That’s not My best for you.

That’s NOT My best for you!

THAT’S NOT MY BEST FOR YOU!

My best for you looks like boundaries and margin. Not doing more, but less.

The boundaries and the margin are for me, needs God wants to meet in my life. Maybe that’s not your issue, the thing God is trying to give you His best in.

But what is His best for you this new merciful day early in 2017? What is He revealing He wants you to possess, so you can be your best? Remember our high calling as believers? We are to reveal His glory. Embracing His goodness, letting Him fill us with His love when we are empty, allowing Him to lead and guide our life─really, fully, all the way … even when it’s hard.

What is God showing you in your need for a do over? What good does He want to bring forth like the rising of the sun on a fresh, new day as He helps you elevate higher?

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₁Thomas, R. L. (1998). New American Standard Hebrew-Aramaic and Greek dictionaries : updated edition. Anaheim: Foundation Publications, Inc.