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The Beauty of Gathering

11.24.2020 by Alaina Bennetts //

Welcome! Happy Thanksgiving Week!  This week is my (Megan’s) favorite.  I get to introduce you to my dear friend, Alaina!  When we decided to write on gathering, I couldn’t think of anyone better to share with you.  She really knows how to love her community, and point them back to Jesus. With all that is up in the air right now with traveling and gathering restrictions, the pandemic, and everything else, we know that the holidays may be feeling really different.  Whether everything feels the same or you find yourself in a place of mourning or rejoicing,  I pray that you will be reminded of the presence of God with you and that you will be drawn in by the comfort only He can provide.

 

Who burnt my turkey? (Guest)

 

I’m 33 years old. When I was 31, I started dating Kyle, and 8 months later I married him. Before that, I was pretty single — Like hadn’t gone on a date in over a year and people were highly encouraging to join e-Harmony kind of single. But here’s the thing, even though I was dateless for a while, I learned the art of doing life with people that kept my mind (mostly) off what I didn’t have.  What was one of my secrets, you ask? Sharing a meal with others. Sometimes I’d even reason that communion, Jesus style, was intended to be a whole meal.  So it didn’t matter how busy I was, I loved pausing long enough to enjoy dinner with someone else across the table from me. 

There was something about being with another person face to face and hearing them say what was going on that allowed me to be fully present with them. It gave me permission to be in their world and them in mine for that time. Sharing a meal brought us together. There was a sense of unity in our breaking of the bread. It almost felt like, for that time, we were family, even if we weren’t. All those conversations allowed me to hear at a deeper level what was going on past the quick, “How are you?” exchanges.

In a lot of ways I can see how God shaped those talks to grow me as His daughter, so I would be about His business. As I would step into the lives of those around me, I’d get a better idea of how to live out what the Bible says about loving my neighbor. It gave me a chance to exercise my faith; to pray with people who were hurting; to listen to those who were mourning, and to rejoice with those who were celebrating. It also gave me a chance, more than once, to say, “I’m sorry,” or “I forgive you.” Gathering together wasn’t about the perfect Instagram post to show off later, it was about doing life with people, even when it got messy. Getting close to people can show all our imperfections, but it also shows so much more of the beauty the  life God gave us has to offer. 

And then 2020 came, and we all experienced the pandemic of Covid-19.  Where staying home was mandated, and gathering was prohibited. What was only going to be 2 weeks of slowing down turned into a whole year getting turned upside down as schools adjusted, concerts and sports were canceled, and churches shut the doors of their buildings for the first time in the history of my lifetime and yours. Gatherings weren’t allowed. Even families’ social distanced to keep each other safe, and slow down the spread of the virus.

Screens were the only way we connected as spring started to come into season, but then people started getting creative. Why? Because they realized, gathering together is a key ingredient when you are intentional about living like Jesus did. People started going for walks – no matter the weather.  They dropped off meals. They were showing up to talk to their friends and family on the lawn. Or talking to their neighbors from their porch. 

Churches changed up how they worshiped Jesus & looked for ways to be intentional about serving one another.

 John 13:34-35 reads:

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”

Have you ever noticed, people don’t accidentally love someone? They have to deliberately plan to put someone else before their own wants. You can’t love other people if you’re doing life alone. In fact, you can’t live out the Bible if you are doing life alone.  

2020 is coming to end and the coming holidays are going to look different than the traditions we are used to, but we still have a choice for how we handle them. 

We have a choice to look for ways to love others, and make room for it in schedules – even if it’s different. 

A choice to go slow with our day so we can be intentional with those God has put in our life. 

A choice to respect how others feel safe, and accommodate them.  You can show them some Jesus-love in person or from afar. 

Yes, gathering is going to look different, but if we don’t prioritize it, we lose the chance to live out the example of the Rescuer that the world desperately needs right now, Jesus Christ.  He is the reason our hope is never lost, no matter the current affairs. Jesus is the reason we can sit across the table and share a meal, even if it’s outside and we’re 6 feet apart.  We’re just looking for a chance to live out the love Jesus first showed us so many years ago; the love that changed the world, and it continues to change mine. 

Categories // Guest Perspectives, Who Burnt My Turkey? Tags // community, gathering, John 13:34-35, Thanksgiving

Do They Know They Are Loved?

03.04.2020 by Tracy Stella //

I (Tracy) am looking forward to seeing how God uses each of the posts from the  FACETS team to enlarge your understanding of how deeply you are loved. There is no greater truth that has the power to transform your life and the lives of others. You won’t want to miss what God puts on Jennifer’s, Megan’s, and our special guest Judy Maldonado’s hearts. We’d love to hear a report of what God does in your heart as you  open His love letters to you each week this month. We invite you to let His love greet you across these pages. He pursues you.

03 2020 Do they know they are loved? T StellaWe want to think our brothers and sisters in Christ know they are loved. We understand the world might not get the height and depth of God’s love for them. But our brothers and sisters in Christ?  Surely. Surely, they know at the core of who they are that they are loved.  They are forgiven. They are righteous. They are holy and redeemed. They have the deposit of the Holy Spirit ministering, filling, teaching, comforting, cleansing, purifying, sanctifying, and so much more.  They know they are loved. Right?

Right?

Sometimes, we can say the words without really believing them, or believing them for ourselves.  Jesus loves you.  We may even say it over ourselves, but do we let it sink deep into our hearts?  Do we let our Father’s hands etch it upon our minds, so we never doubt it?

Or do we only believe those things are true for the “good Christians”, the ones who seem to have all their spiritual ducks in a row?

Here’s the truth: if you accepted Christ, you are a good Christian. You are good enough to receive His love. He is not disappointed in you, precious one. He loves you. He wants nothing more than to help you, to heal you, to make you whole.

We are all being transformed into His image.  None of us has arrived. That’s not what this faith walk is about.

Do we wear God’s love like armor to protect us from the enemy’s fiery darts?  We need to. Love is a weapon. Jesus wants His warriors to wear His love. Perfect love casts out all fear.  (See 1 John 4:18)

Afraid you are unlovable? Perfect love casts that thought over the boat and into the abyss.  No one is beyond the reach of God’s love.

Maybe we didn’t do this life perfectly – even after getting saved and we think, “Well that’s it. God can’t use me now. I screwed up royally.”

Maybe we never even got to the mindset where we thought God could use us in the first place. Yes, we got saved. But maybe we think it was by the skin of our teeth, like if God really knew, if those people over there really knew me, they wouldn’t think I was worthy, worthy of God’s love, God’s grace, their fellowship, their friendship, or serving any kingdom purpose.

God knows what He’s getting in each of us. And He accepts us anyhow, whatever our condition. He’s not surprised by who we are.  He’s far more interested in who we are becoming. You are not a disappointment to Him. He is your biggest Champion. He is your Companion. Let His love walk you through every season. Let His love greet you on the good days. Let His love minister to you on the dark days when you wished things looked different.

He is present in both.

And He won’t leave you, especially in your darkest hour.

It’s Valentine’s Day and I’m writing this post, pondering whether the people all around me know they are loved.  It’s the day of all things red – flowers, hearts, and celebration of love.  Christ’s redemptive blood─Love’s greatest sacrifice.

And yet I ponder the fact someone left this world too soon, because in his darkest moments he didn’t fully understand the depths of God’s love for him. Depression doesn’t see beyond today’s struggle. It lies to us saying, “There’s no hope for the future.”

A funeral on Valentine’s Day is hard.

That causes me to pause, a long pause to reflect. Why? How? How can this be?

How can someone who loved the Lord so deeply not know how deeply the Lord loved him?  It breaks my heart for him before he breathed his very last breath. It breaks my heart for his family. It breaks my heart for what the world will now miss, because this man left the world too soon.

It’s not any less heartbreaking when someone who doesn’t know Christ leaves this world too soon. But I could at least rationalize in my head that without Jesus this world just gets too hard sometimes. Without Him to carry the weight of our burdens when they become too much, they are too much.

I know that from my own story. It’s tragedies like this that churn my memory. Before I knew Christ, I hit rock bottom, a few times.  Life was hard, as it  sometimes can be. And without the Lord, hard things can hit us like a ton of bricks. Like a wrecking ball, they nearly take us out.

When I was in my early 20’s I was sexually violated at a party (I can’t bring myself to type the word for what it really was, but you can fill in the word, I’m sure.) If I can’t type the word 30+ years later, you might imagine how I handled it back then. I suppressed the memory. I shoved it into a dark corner of my brain, because I couldn’t deal with it.

The only problem with that logic is that it isn’t helpful. At all. A buried wound isn’t healed. If not dealt with, it festers.  And that’s what it did.

My heart and brain couldn’t deal with the pain I tried to cover up with the equivalent of an emotional band-aid. Not dealt with, the pain dealt with me.

That young woman who I have such compassion for now, at the hardness of that trespass against me, couldn’t cover over the pain with her suck it up buttercup skills.  Instead, I attempted to take my own life. Depression and grief tried to overtake me.

But God!

God’s mercy sent someone to break a door down and literally saved me.  God’s love sent help. I didn’t know Him, but He knew me — even back then, even in the midst of my hot mess of a life.

Fast forward to my 40’s and I found myself ready to sink from the weight of severe depression. I’d lost my marriage, my home, my career, my sense of identity in almost every way.  On the very darkest day, I was ready to leave. I was just too weary. I wasn’t a wimp, but I was tired of fighting to hang on. I’d given up hope.

God’s mercy sent a woman to my front door the day I had decided I was done. God disagreed. He wanted me to believe. Believe in Him. Believe in myself. Believe there was hope beyond the darkness of that day.

And there was.

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”─Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

These aren’t just any words. If they are familiar to you, don’t let their familiarity steal the powerful, transforming, hopeful truth they possess. There is a bright future ahead for you, even if you don’t see it in this exact moment.

God’s mercy reaching for us tells me how much He genuinely loves us.  His mercy reaches for us all; I believe it with all my heart.  Cling to Him and the hope only He can give.  His love changes lives.  I know that full well, and He wants that for all of us.

Do you know you are loved that much too? You are you know!

In both of those scenarios I didn’t know Christ. I didn’t know the depth of His love for me. And when the world hits hard like a tsunami, we can nearly be washed away at sea.

But here’s the thing.

Once we are saved, the same thing can happen. We aren’t invincible.  We need God’s love, especially when we want to do great things for God’s kingdom — and we are.

I think of this man who left us too soon. He wasn’t perfect any more than you or I. But He did love Jesus. He was Christ’s ambassador.  He was a worshipper. He was a warrior. He prayed for healing for me, and I received it. He was a vessel for God’s power and love.

How does someone who embodies God’s love to others not know it for himself?

How does someone who has passion and zeal for Christ not find the strength to hang on? It’s the very hardest of questions, and I don’t have an answer. It’s utterly heart breaking.

I think of all this world will miss out on and my eyes well with tears.

I wonder, what is the point of this?

I wonder how God can work this to good.  I know His word says He works all things together for the good of those who love Him. (See Romans 8:28)

But how God?

How do you take this tragedy and make it into something good?

I don’t doubt You in that; I just can’t see it. But I do pray You reveal Your goodness. I pray You wring every ounce of good You can from this tragedy. Save lives. Open eyes. Reveal Your heart. Heal wounds. Bring revival.

I already saw evidence of God’s goodness at the funeral when this man’s son spoke. I wept at his courage, at his sharing of story, and the beautiful legacy of the love of Christ this man left in his children. I pray this son is one of God’s greatest warriors and that God use him in a mighty way, even as He already did today. I pray God continues to help him rise into the fullness of his calling and that He be a powerful and profound voice that rises up against the darkness. That God’s light would shine brilliantly through him, even as we saw today. In Jesus’ name!

To do the hard thing, I hope this son knows he lived out Scripture poignantly today. Well done good and faithful servant. Well done! You honored your father, and you blessed everyone who got to hear how he shaped your life.

I wonder why I’m writing this post and I think it’s to remind us, none of us is immune.

We all need God.

We all need each other.

Jesus said…

“A new command I give you:  Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”─John 13:34-35 NIV

We can’t assume because someone knows Christ that he or she is okay.

We can’t assume because someone has a smile slathered across his or her face they are free from problems and don’t need our help.

We can’t assume because someone loves the Lord and even worships Him that he or she believes they are worthy of Christ’s love.  (They are. You are. I am. But we can’t assume anyone believes it.)

If God puts someone on your heart, pray for them.

If God asks you to reach out to someone, do so. You never know if that call will save someone’s life.

We are not called to be codependent, but we are co-heirs with Christ called to love one another.

If God is Immanuel, and He is, He knows. He knows every heart. He holds it tenderly in His hands. And He may call upon us to help that person keep his or her head above water.

God has given all believers the manifestation of the Holy Spirit to be used for the common good.

Now to each one the manifestation of the Spirit is given for the common good.─1 Corinthians 12:7 NIV

I’ve seen several tragedies in the Church recently, and I think God is saying, “Enough!”

Enough!

He wants us to see each other, really see each other. He wants us to be brave enough to sit with someone in his or her pain.  He wants us to love. Sacrificially. No more doing church. He wants us to be the Church.  We don’t do these things in our strength, but through the manifestation of the Spirit who deeply cares about the common good.

Mind you, I’m not blaming the Church for these things. I’m merely suggesting we remain attentive and observant to whom God places before us.  There is purpose in where He has planted us.  The people He has placed in our lives are there for a reason.

We never know what someone is really going through.  We don’t know who among us doesn’t believe that they are loved.

What if you and I are the people God is sending to show them they are?

When I went to this man’s funeral, I felt strongly like I was supposed to collect his precious bride’s face in my hands and see her, to give her the most tender of Christ’s touch in a very fragile time.  I prayed she would feel God’s love through my arms. I knew my hug wouldn’t be sufficient. I am not enough to comfort her in her grief.

But God is. His Spirit in me and you is the love His kids need.

I pray God’s Spirit manifests in each of us as we are an expression of His love.

There are days when I need it. And there are days when I can give it.

We should be very generous with each other as we give God’s love away. His love is better than any Valentine’s Day bouquet.  His love won’t die in a few days. His love is never failing, never ending.

But from everlasting to everlasting

The LORD’s love is with those who fear him,

And his righteousness with their children’s children─

─Psalm 103:17 NIV

That gives me comfort. For all eternity, God will love us. And not only that, but His righteousness extends to our children’s children.

Lord, if there is someone in this moment who is full of despair and doesn’t believe he or she is worthy of Your love, of life itself, I pray You stop them in their tracks right now, that You send a missionary of mercy – even if that is me in this very moment – to say there is a brighter day than what today’s dark shadow suggests. Hang on. Let God minister to you. Let Him fill you to overflowing with His love, healing, and redemption. I pray, Lord, You help anyone struggling with depression. Guide them to professionals and friends You have set in place to serve them. Let the help be kingdom-minded and attentive to Your voice, giving wisdom and discernment to bring healing and hope.  And, Lord, I do pray You would help us all to see the cries for help. I pray we don’t miss them. I pray You bring something good from this tragedy, Lord. I pray You strengthen the Church to be able to help minister to one another. We need Your guidance in every way, Lord. We can’t love well without Your leadership showing us how. So please show us. And help every eye reading this post receive Your love. Help us to receive Your love, Lord. Let us wear Your armor of love well. Let us be warriors for You, wielding love as a weapon against the fiery darts of the enemy. Let us be the belief when our brothers and sisters can’t and let them be that for us when we have weak moments ourselves. Keep us humble and submitted to You, Lord. Let none of us think just because we are Christian that we have to portray we have it all figured out, or we have it all together. Let us be receivers of your love, grace, and mercy, because we are desperate for it.  In Jesus’ name, amen!

If you have thoughts of suicide, please seek help. Reach out to your pastor or a Christian counselor. If you are in northern Illinois, there are 3 counseling practices I know and trust to serve you with the love of Christ. God loves you so much! Don’t doubt it for a single moment. This is His mercy reaching for you.

YOU ARE LOVED!

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Signature: Tracy Stella

RESOURCE LINKS to Christian counseling practices in northern Illinois.

Catherine Hunter and Associates

Cherry Hill Counseling

Ken Gates and Associates

Categories // Do They Know They Are Loved?, Faith, Life Lessons, Tracy Stella's Perspective Tags // 1 Corinthians 12:7, 1 John 4:18, Death, Depression, Funeral, grief, Holy Spirit, hope, Jeremiah 29:11, John 13:34-35, Love, Love One Another, Mercy, Perfect Love, Psalm 103:17, Romans 8:28, Suicide

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