LIfe Archives – Facets of Faith

Welcome to FACETS, friend. This month we’re thinking about a life infused with play, or in my case, living life unedited. You can check out Tracy’s post here. Come back the next two weeks to read posts from Megan and our guest writer, Lauren.

I (Jennifer) spend a lot of my time editing others’ work on stacks of pages and through a screen. Bible studies, books, dissertations, web content—I work on a variety of projects with people. I examine the work, scrutinizing spelling, grammar, and punctuation. I want to help each writer put the best work forward. It’s my job to be sure the words are polished and presentable.

I’ve got a red pen, and I’m not afraid to use it!

I’m an editor professionally, but it’s not lost on me—the “red pen mindset” has crept into other areas of life. I’ve been living a carefully edited life most of my 51 years. A tightly-run ship in my childhood home transitioned to self-protection after traumatic events and settled into controlling patterns wherever I had a chance. For years I heard Star Trek’s Captain Piccard say, “Make it so!” in my head. Then I did what I could to orchestrate the things (and people) according to plan. I’m sad that’s been my reality for so long.

What you don’t know…

I’m returning from one of the most emotional trips I can remember. I’m leaving Nevada after visiting my dad and his lovely wife, soaring high above a western state and winging toward Seattle to connect, hang a right, and land in Chicago.

It’s a little like the time I left Oklahoma City as a kid. I didn’t know I was closer to the last time I’d see my grandfather; I still bawled when I left. My mom’s dad was an amazing man (take a peek at this childhood memory, and you’ll know why). My grandfather and my dad were cut from different cloth, a stark contrast. I don’t recall the same intensely sweet memories with my dad.

Fast-forward to today, and my father isn’t the same man. The gaze is different—softer, maybe. A bit more distant, too. His mannerisms are the same and completely different. The jokes are the same; I know them word-for-word. The polite apologies, thankfulness for my presence, and generosity; that’s all new. I’m meeting the same man and one I’ve never known. It’s gain and loss I don’t have words for at the moment.

Makin’ memories!

I’m traveling with a sister who lives a much less edited life. Two flights out to Nevada. A “Thelma and Louise” road trip from one part of the state to the other through the desert in a 2020 black Mustang convertible, top down. Laughs, photos, and GPS in the middle of nowhere and no signal. An Area 51 trinket shop where (clearly!) trinkets had to be bought. The tiniest state capital. Several days with my dad who definitely lives an unedited life. Losing every card game. A touristy town up the mountain. A late birthday lunch at Red Lobster. Riding mountain roads my dad has driven for thirty years (and still does with skill). A crazy drive back through the desert where GPS took us into California and through the Sierras. (The driver was ‘not disappointed’ with the video game-like driving in the right car!) A drive through Red Rock Canyon. Dinner with my writer friend in Vegas. Sleeping to the airline’s on hold phone system all night. 4:30 AM. Sadness parking the ‘Stang the last time. Two flights with a 4-minute connection window when the door opened (that we made with a sprint and one minute to spare!). And on to Chicago.

Stress? Yes. Fun? Absolutely an adrenaline rush!

Thelma, Louise, and life lessons…

Beyond all we shoe-horned into a few days and travel glitches; my usual, careful patterns were challenged. A muscle car, a road trip with someone who doesn’t edit the same parts of life, and meeting a man who doesn’t edit life much at all will push comfortable boundaries. Something in me wants—or desperately needs?—order in life.

When I consider a playful, unedited life, I know there’s room to grow. There’s a huge difference between my red pen mindset and letting the Lord order my days.

Order, please!

The steps of a man are established by the Lord, when he delights in his way… Psalm 37:23 ESV

Trusting Jesus in every situation infuses His order to life and transitions the stress of my need for order to His care. I trust the One who loves me and cares for me!

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. I Peter 5:7 NLT

He knows the road, and He’s on it!

When the road in front of me feels like switchbacks, dips, and bumps in the Sierras, everything in me wants to “Make it so!” But I trade trust for exhaustion and a measure of failure when I take charge. I never intend to walk off the narrow road. My heart wants to be with the One who knows the options, outcomes, and the beauty in divine appointments with anyone He puts in my path. My head, though! Control is about me and my comfort, and it has nothing to do with why He has me here.

A follower of Jesus loves Him with all her heart, mind, and strength; she looks for opportunity to love and serve others, and ultimately introduce them to Jesus in casual conversation and day-to-day activity. That kind of unedited life is infused with and fueled by the Holy Spirit’s truth, love, and power. I can’t muster it; it’s not a “fake it till you make it” thing. And it can be fun and joy-filled!

Trusting and following—that’s where the rubber squeals on the mountain road.

The Right Edits

There are choices (edits) to make in line with who I am in Jesus, and there is so much out there that allows for God-gifted joy and significance, and both sad and happy tears in good company. I lean a little more serious than playful, but I’m eyeing the fun road with Him and others! (Probably not in a shiny 2020 Mustang, sadly.)

Ordering my world exhausts me! I wonder how I’m going to do this fun, unedited life thing. Fear isn’t needed, so I’ll do the work to set it aside. The Bible tells me my steps are ordered, no matter how it looks. I’m reminded control is a myth, fun lies in opportunities I can say yes to, and smiling in uncomfortable moments is a choice.

If you live a carefully edited life, how’s it going for you? Can we both lean into the unedited life? We can certainly pray for each other to find joy in His ordered plans for us.

If you live the God-honoring, play-filled life, share with the rest of us. How’d you do that? Inquiring minds want to know!

If you’ve read this far, thank you for blessing and honoring me. Let’s connect at the Facebook page or the comments below!

As always, sharing is caring. Who else might consider the unedited, playful life?

We’ve been talking about God’s resurrecting power here at Facets of Faith this month. Tracy and Jen shared their perspectives earlier this month and you don’t want to miss them. Now it’s my (Kim’s) turn. Ready?

I don’t like to feel out of control. That feeling of powerlessness, an inability to influence or change circumstances or, to be honest, even people around me.

Call me a control freak, with this desire to order and maintain my world. These feelings of powerlessness that sneak up on me, but like everyone, there’s a story behind these impulses. I know all too well what it feels like to be utterly helpless, completely powerless, and it scares the life right out of me.

It happened one day about twelve years ago. I left my home thinking all was normal, as my every day life could possibly be. I forgot something on my way to work so, in my typically optimistic fashion, I turned my car around and determined this was simply more time to listen to a message from one of our pastors.

Little did I know what was happening as I turned my car back that morning. Little did I know the scene I was about to drive upon would change everything. My family. My home. My life. Nothing would be the same.

Fire poured from the home I left just twelve minutes earlier. My home that still held my precious Emma and her daddy.

I remember standing on the driveway feeling utterly powerless, the crushing weight of what I lacked to stop the scene unfolding before me. The fear that snatched my breath away. The horror that my daughter may have breathed her last. The crushing reality that my greatest fear just became my living nightmare.

My heart shriveled up and threatened to die that day fire destroyed everything. But somehow, in some way, it continued to beat and pump living-giving blood. It continued to beat as the doctor told me Emma died. It continued to beat as her daddy struggled against pneumonia and third-degree burns. It continued to beat as I stood next to her little white coffin and stroked her tender cheek that no longer held the warmth of life.

My heart betrayed me as it continued to beat and pump, reminding me that life continued on even though death made its unwelcome departure with my little girl.

Powerless.

Never as a mom, as a woman, as a person did I feel so utterly out of control. I never expected this. I feared it. I prayed against it. I never expected to bury my daughter. And that weight of grief, those unexpected blows as wave after wave pummeled against my wounded body caused me to gasp for each life-sustaining breath.

How do you survive the dark days your deepest fears come alive? Maybe you, too, have walked the treacherous road of losing a child or a spouse, your health or your job. How do you find your footing when you’ve been knocked to your knees? How do you choose life when all you taste is death?

The Lord is close to the brokenhearted; he rescues those whose spirits are crushed.” Psalm 34:18, NLT

I clung to the One who not only gives life, but who resurrects it. The One who takes dead, lifeless things and creates life by breathing into dry bones (Ezekial 37:5). The One who conquered my greatest fear with a single crushing blow as He hung on the cross and triumphed over death. I was powerless, without control, but I knew the One who loves me, who not only has power but is the source of power, and I held on to Him for dear life. Literally.

May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” Romans 15:13, NLT

His is the power that fed thousands of people with few loaves and a couple of fish. His is the power that silenced the seas and called a dead man from the grave. His is the power that healed diseases and stopped years of bleeding. His is the power that conquered death once and for all.

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ’s power may rest on me.” 2 Corinthians 12:9, NLT

That power . . . that resurrecting power changes everything. And it’s not just for then, those days Jesus walked the earth or as his disciples performed miracles. God’s resurrecting power that rose Jesus from the grave is available for us today. Now.

His resurrecting power heals the deepest wounds and shines bright in the darkest of places. His resurrecting power declares goodness despite brokenness, and offers hope in despair. His resurrecting power breathes life, restores shattered hearts, and revives lost dreams.

He saved me. His resurrecting power revived me. His power gives me strength on the days I miss my girl the most and shifts my gaze from all I lost to all He has in store for me. His resurrection power breathes new life, life that I enjoy and embrace all the days my feet will walk this earth. And He gives me hope, hope that death and destruction do not have the final say. He does. And that same power He gives me is available for you. Will you choose life?

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being,” Ephesians 3:16, NLT

How have you experienced God’s resurrecting power in your life? Join the conversation and leave a comment or jump over to our Facebook page to share there.

Life: Unedited