Facets of Faith

Conversations about life, faith, and friendship.

What Are You Going Back To?

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This month FACETS of Faith explores the question, what are you going back to? The topic stumped me (Tracy).  I’ve been praying. And praying. And praying.

My fingers pecked across the keyboard. “I’m not even sure what You want me to write about this month, Lord…” Prattle to hopefully jump start my creative engine. It didn’t work.  Battery dead. No Power. (And without His Power, my words WOULD be just mindless prattle.)

So I stopped, closed up shop, and did something else. No sense typing a bunch of nonsense, even if I was getting a little angsty with a deadline looming.  You see, it’s really important to me I don’t just write what I want.  I want to write what God is calling me to write, relevant and in season.

Finally, fresh revelation. The rescue made me as happy as seeing roadside assistance when you’re broken down on a dead-end street.  A trinity AAA rescue!

What are you going back to?  First and foremost, I’m going back to seeking the Lord. When I don’t know what to do, in situations big and small, I must continue to seek the Lord.  I feel this is my first response most of the time (these days).  But this is a good reminder to us all ─ God cares about it all. He cares about injustice across the globe, poverty and provision for people’s needs, how and whom we serve, what we do in our free time, and even what I write about.

Don’t think you aren’t important to Him. Don’t think your cares and concerns aren’t significant enough to put before God. They are, because you are!  God wants us all to know how deep and wide His love is for us.  It’s often through His response in small circumstances where He shows us how BIG we are loved.

Rejoice always and delight in your faith; be unceasing and persistent in prayer; in every situation [no matter what the circumstances] be thankful and continually give thanks to God; for this is the will of God for you in Christ Jesus.─1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 AMP

Prayer without ceasing is only possible if we include God in everything. So let’s involve Him in every little detail. When He shows us the way and what’s needed, lift up a shout of praise and rejoice!

What are you going back to? I’m also reminded to wait on Him and His timing.  There’s no sense trying to birth something before He’s darn good and ready to do so!  It’s futile, so why not just give in to His holy calendar? Sometimes the closer we are to our due date, the less patient we are to abide in God’s timing. But that’s where peace presides. Imagine pushing and pushing in month 6 of your pregnancy. You have 3 more months, so what’s your hurry? Sure. You want your body back. Sure. You’re anxious to see your new little one. Sure. You’re ready to wear a belt again and perhaps sleep without having to get up and go potty every 30 minutes. But you’ve got 3 more months. No amount of your wishing, and wanting, and even push, push, pushing is going to produce what isn’t ready to be birthed.

Be still, and know that I am God.─Psalm 46:10a ESV

If I had a dollar for every time I’ve seen this verse over the last year or so I might have the beginnings of a really good vacation fund.

But as irritating (and laughable) as it sometimes is when I get a fresh dose of this scripture, it’s also liberating. It’s not up to me. I don’t have to do anything until God says, “do it”. Once He gives the green light, it’s full speed ahead.  The road is well paved, because He’s prepared the way and I’m just following all His signs.

This Way.

Now That.

U-Turn.

Revisit That.

Go A Different Way.

Say “Hi” To Her.

Buy That One Dinner.

Say No.

Say Yes.

Construction Ahead, But Keep Going.

As we listen to His voice, He keeps us on the path. His path. The one that keeps us in peace even as He stretches and grows us.

And that thought leads me to God’s answer for me (and perhaps for some of you too). What are you going back to?

His very personal answer for me… my life. He wants me to go back to my life.  He’s saying. This is the way. Walk in it. Don’t put limits on your life. If you do, you’re putting limits on Me.

Are you putting limits on God and what He can do in and through you? Read the above paragraph again. Listen to what God is saying.

What does that seemingly grandiose statement mean? I am to go back to my life.

For any of you that have been in a birthing season, you understand it is extremely busy. A new baby to care for, a new business venture, a new job, planting a church, launching a ministry, it’s all a lot of work.

For well over a year I have been involved in starting up a human trafficking residential aftercare ministry. It has been an all-consuming, sometimes exhausting, tear inducing experience even as it has been full of joy and rich rewards to see God move.  I expected spiritual resistance, and even attack, but not to the level in which I encountered it. Let’s just say I have a few battle scars. But man, I wouldn’t have missed that battle for anything! Like a lot of things in life, it has also been so full of unexpected blessing and life altering encounters. I have been given gifts I will take with me long after God calls me away from this ministry.

It has been a hard year or so. It has been humbling. It has been a year of hibernating (in a sense). I didn’t do much else besides eat, breathe, and sleep the ministry. It’s what was needed in the intense start up period.

I had to say “no” to many things I would have been interested in doing; I knew I couldn’t.

But now, it’s a new season.

While I’m still super passionate about human trafficking and doing my part to participate in God’s mission against it, He says He has more.

None spiritual speak here … that kind of freaks me out!  More? Than this? This has been pretty monumental!

But this fight against human trafficking is not all that I am. I am much more. I am who God made me to be. I’m who He is making me to be.

The ministry is up and running and not all-consuming.  It’s busy, but not birthing kind of busy.   Now, He’s saying I can step into some new things and revisit some old endeavors I enjoyed.  Perhaps, my role will look different. Perhaps the gifts God has entrusted me to steward He’ll use in a slightly different capacity.

This morning as I was getting ready, God solidified this new season for me. I listened to Christine Caine’s teaching about stretching and growth. I knew it was for me. Here’s a woman, on fire for the Lord, doing great things for Him, not putting limits on what He can do in and through her. (Talk about a woman with some passion and zeal!)

She shared how she has been stretched by God to do more than she ever thought she could. She had her doubts. She hashed it out with God. And then she said, “Okay, let’s do this!” (so to speak)

Hearing her talk, I knew it was for me.  Perhaps it’s for you too. Do you have a lot on your plate and think to yourself, “I can’t add one thing more?” Maybe you can. But not in your own strength!  Let God do the “pushing” for you and maybe, just maybe you can.

Trust His voice because sometimes that’s not what He’s asking at all. But sometimes. Sometimes, it is!

God is releasing me to more fully explore a leadership role in a writing group I’ve been a part of for a number of years. I’m excited about what He can do in and through all the amazing women He has gathered. These ladies are awesome! All love Jesus and want to do what He wants them to. I think about the leadership development opportunities there might be (something I’m passionate about), and all that any little investment I am allowed to make might be magnified and multiplied. They have big dreams in the name of Jesus, so who wouldn’t want to surround themselves with friendships like that?

I feel released to explore some ministry opportunities at my church ─ at least released enough to have some preliminary discussions of what things could look like. Dream a little. Explore. Noodle. Create in a slightly different fashion.

And I might be able to get back to some of the life coaching I was doing, which I absolutely love.  It requires a full emotional tank, and now that I am not running on emotional empty from ministry launch, I feel more released to engage.

What are you going back to?  If you don’t know, seek God through prayer. If His answer is “delayed”, don’t push. Don’t get ahead, but don’t lag behind.  Wait on His timing to reveal His purposes for your life. Pay attention to seasons, circumstances, and what those might be saying to you about what God has for you. Abide in His presence and let His peace (even in the midst of crazy, crazy) guide your decisions.

I was asked earlier today how I felt about getting older. My honest answer, “Okay”. I feel very alive, because God is always doing something new in my life. He’s interested in my growth (and He’s faithful to grow me).  But here’s the thing …. He knows I’m “all in”. I’m not going to give up even when the going gets really hard. Believe you me, it has from time to time.  In spite of the tough seasons, I’ve got to say “yes” to God.

If we decline what God has for us, that’s when our lives spiral into decline.  If we say “no” when He wants us to say “yes”, we’re not doing what we were made for. It’s not old age or even death that steals life from us. When we stop living, that’s when life leaves us.

How can you most fully engage in the life God is calling you to live? Follow His whispers, His signs to what will make your life great, because you’re becoming more and more the very woman (or man) God designed you to be.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

Don’t forget to check back in later this month to read Kim’s and Jennifer’s perspective, as well as our first male guest contributor who will close out the month’s topic: What are you going back to?

 

A Mama’s Heart on Guilt and Learning to Fly

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We’ve been chatting about something most moms feel at some point in their lives: mama guilt. What do we do with it? How does it affect our parenting? Tracy and Jen shared earlier this month, be sure to check out their stories. Today, it’s my (Kim) turn and I’m sharing something I don’t typically talk about so here we go . . .

He will feed his flock like a shepherd. He will carry the lambs in his arms, holding them close to his heart. He will gently lead the mother sheep with their young.” Isaiah 40:11, NLT

I sat next to my oldest girl, stuffed into an auditorium seat along with hundreds of other students and parents listening to the college president speak.

How did we get there? College freshman orientation. Where had the time flown? Wasn’t I just a student myself with my entire life spread out before me?

Instead, I sat next to Kelsey trying to hold back the tears that threatened to spill. This girl and I had been through so much together. Years of just the two of us as I parented alone. Learning to combine our little family with another as we became a blended family of five and, eventually, adding Emma for a total of six, followed by years that tumbled with trials and hardship, laughter and love.

The president’s words invaded my moment of reminiscing. I tuned in to hear him challenge us to encourage our kids to leave our nest and allow them to fly on their own.

I chuckled and nudged her – that’s exactly what I said! She didn’t like hearing that so much. I believe one of my jobs as a mom is to raise my kids to leave the nest and care for themselves. I still believe that. I wanted Kelsey to take care of herself, no matter what life brought her way.

Oh, how I wanted her to live well and lead a different life than I created.

You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body and knit me together in my mother’s womb. Thank you for making me so wonderfully complex! Your workmanship is marvelous – how well I know it. You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of the womb. You saw me before I was born. Every day of my life was recorded in your book. Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed. How precious are your thoughts about me,O God. They cannot be numbered!” Psalm 139:13-17, NLT

I was in my second year of college and on track to become a teacher. I didn’t have a boyfriend but yearned to be loved. The yearning became so strong that I chose sex before marriage and ended up pregnant. There’s more to that story but some details aren’t meant to be shared, only left in the past with grace. But that single decision led another and I gave birth to a beautiful baby girl though I was barely past the girl stage myself. I was twenty years old.

Even then I determined to protect and provide for my girl, no matter what. I determined to raise her to be strong and courageous and compassionate and deeply, deeply loved.

But there were days, and sometimes still are, when the weight of guilt presses down accusing me of all I’ve done wrong, pointing its snarly finger at every place I’ve failed, how I failed her.

When those thoughts and feelings of failure take root, others often join in until I tumble headfirst toward despair. They remind me that life didn’t get easier after I married. In fact, it turned much more difficult when we lost her youngest sister in a fire that destroyed all we knew and grief ripped at our souls. I did my best to protect her from the worst and tried to make up for what she lost, because she lost so very much, but I could only do so much.

So I pushed and encouraged and prayed, sometimes from a place of genuine love but often through a heart filled with guilt. Oh, how I love my girl and wanted to keep her safe, shielding her from the wounds of life. I didn’t want her to feel the pain and rejection I experienced from being a young single mom and the hardship that followed.

My fear of her pain and being crushed by my own pushed me to learn more about God’s character as I experienced the depth of His love. I realized the greatest gift I could give my girl was a life whole heartedly pursuing Jesus. That meant I needed to give Jesus access to my whole heart, allowing Him to heal the broken places and breathe life into the wounded spaces. That meant I needed to release the crushing power of guilt and shame to the One who frees and doesn’t condemn, and choose to trust God to redeem and restore all that had been destroyed.

It was during those dark days that I also began to learn in order to truly fight for my girl, I needed to wage war in a different way. I couldn’t protect her from the sorrows of this world, so much was beyond my control. But I could pray to the One who ultimately protects and loves her infinitely more than I do.

So when the spiral of despair begin and the feelings swoop in, I grab hold of them and bring them to Jesus in prayer. Scripture says it this way:

The world is unprincipled. It’s dog-eat-dog out there! The world doesn’t fight fair. But we don’t live or fight our battles that way – never have and never will. The tools of our trade aren’t for marketing or manipulation, but they are for demolishing that entire massively corrupt culture. We use our powerful God-tools for smashing warped philosophies, tearing down barriers erected against the truth of God, fitting every loose though and emotion and impulse into the structure of life shaped by Christ.” 2 Corinthians 10:3-5, The Message

I started to see a better way to protect her, to fight for her. I longed to see my girl experience healing in her own heart and soul, and to grow in wisdom and strength. I longed for her to see God’s hand at work, especially during those darkest of days.

There’s such a tender balance between allowing our kids to experience pain trusting they find hope. It’s such a fine line to walk praying they’ll see Jesus knowing it often happens at the bottom of a pit. But pray I did, and will continue to until my final breath.

As I sat next to Kelsey at her college freshman orientation and allowed the tidal wave of emotions splash over me – the guilt and hope, the excitement and fear, the love and loss – I was reminded again that God is bigger than my feelings, and He is greater than my failures and guilt. For sitting beside me was a beautiful, strong, and independent young woman who had begun to learn to follow Jesus on her own. She could have chosen a different way or even hidden from her own pain. Instead, she was learning to fly, just as her mama had prayed.

Even youths will become weak and tired, and young men will fall in exhaustion. But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength. They will soar high on wings like eagles. They will run and not grow weary. They will walk and not faint.” Isaiah 40:30-31, NLT

How do you navigate mama’s guilt? Join the conversation by commenting below or jump over to our Facebook page and share. We mamas need to stick together!

How Does God’s Resurrection Power Change The Way You Live?

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Welcome to Facets of Faith and this month’s question: How does God’s resurrection power change the way you live? If you are unfamiliar with the term resurrection or would like to gain more understanding, read yesterday’s post entitled What’s so good about Good Friday?

The greatest difficulty in answering this month’s question is to limit my (Tracy’s) response to just one. When God’s resurrection power grabs hold of our hearts, we are transformed from the inside out, top-to-bottom, as He brings every good work in us to completion. Our minds are renewed, we are changed, and because we are changed others are too.

God, in His sweetness, helped me to narrow my focus. If I tossed a net to capture all the ways God’s resurrection power has changed my life, it would break from the weight of all God’s good work. Like Peter who tossed his net over the boat a second time, God’s provision in my life has been great.

But that’s not where we started. Even though God was always providing for me, I didn’t see Him or His hand in my life.

One of the spiritual mile markers Jesus gave me started here….

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”─Jeremiah 29:11 NIV

Like a child dragging her baby doll and blanket, I drug that verse with me everywhere. I didn’t know what else to do. I had no hope at the time. I couldn’t see past my circumstances. I was lost in a sea of sin─mine and others.

That verse was my lifeline. God used it to literally save my life. I was overwhelmed by my circumstances. Me. Little Ms. Independent who could figure her way out of just about anything and had always prided herself in that. Resilient almost became Rest In Peace.

And then Jesus stepped in. He spoke hope into my heart. So many sweet-nothings from my now-Savior. But back then? We were just getting to know one another.

Where do I sit today? Grateful! That’s where.  Pulsating in God’s power. Resurrection power. Always connected. He is the Source. All that is good in me is because of Him. Anything good I get to do is because of Him. He touched my heart and transformed it, because He loves me. He loves you that way too. His resurrection power has the ability to take those once lost and help them to find their way back up to their feet. Jesus helps us stand when without His power, we would puddle and flop like a fish.

One of the things I love about Jesus is He speaks to us. Not in an audible voice (at least not with me), but like His Word promises when it says His sheep know His voice, I now do. I remember being thirsty to hear Him. I was curious how.

How do you hear God? And how do you know it’s God and not just a voice in your head thinking these things? Over time, He showed me. He trained my ear to recognize His “voice”.

If you are thirsty to hear His voice, He will teach you too. The best advice I can give is to ask for His help. Jesus, I want to hear You. Please teach me how to hear and recognize Your voice. I know He’ll answer a plea like that. Like any relationship, it takes time but He’ll honor that request.

This morning God spoke to me and showed me a connection I’d not caught before. He wasn’t going to let it get away. God helped me to reel it in. Slowly. Gradually. His truth and its meaning grasped me in a deeper, more profound way than it had before.

My eyes had read the Scriptures. Plenty of times.  These verses answer our question: How does God’s resurrection power change the way you live?

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart. I will be found by you,” declares the LORD, “and will bring you back from captivity”─Jeremiah 29:11-14a NIV

Do you see it? Do you see how God’s resurrection power changes the way we live?

Yes, God delivered me in many ways from captivity. It could be an answer, but that’s not the answer God brought to the surface this morning.

God wants us to know HOW we access His resurrection power, not necessarily the byproduct of His resurrection power. (Although I suppose that’s fine too. We need to know what we’re working toward. Freedom from captivity is definitely worth accessing Christ’s power for.)

I think most of us would want freedom as a goal.

I think more people don’t know HOW to attain it.

Then you will call on me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you.

That’s how!

People─even those who call themselves Christian and would say they love Jesus─often find it hard to pray. But THAT is where our real power exists. We tap into God’s resurrection power through prayer.

I love that God connected prayer to my original life verse. I didn’t know it all those years ago, but I’d grow to love prayer to the point where I can’t not do it. (And I’m letting the double negative go friends because it’s exactly how I feel.)  Little did I know, God had planted it in my heart all along as a spiritual gift He desired to grow. And He placed instruction for it right next to my life verse.  He knew He’d grow my love to hear His voice through prayer. He knew He’d ask me to stretch myself and then stretch my life verse to become verses, no longer stopping at 11. We’d be working from an expanded version.

Why do I say that’s how we access God’s resurrection power?

I’ve felt it. I’ve felt Him. Literally, power surges from God pulsing through me when I get out of His way and let Him pray the prayers through me that He desires to be prayed. It’s awesome! A bit unexplainable. Might sound hokey, only I know it’s the Holy Spirit putting His power behind God’s inspired prayers.

The more I experience God’s resurrection power through prayer, the more I want to experience it because I’m experiencing Him. I trust it most when I don’t know the person and couldn’t possibly know what they need… but God does.

I’m reading an excellent book on prayer, The Daniel Prayer, Prayer That Moves Heaven And Changes Nations by Anne Graham Lotz.

Consider a question she asks, “When was the last time you heard someone pray to the point that you became more aware of the One to whom the person was speaking, than you were of the person doing the speaking?”₁

That’s the power I’m talking about and what I think God wanted emphasized.

Even simple things you know you have no business knowing exhilarate. In prayer you’re told, “Wear the shirt that says, ‘Write Your Story’ on it.” Mind you … no T-Shirts are allowed. But you follow the voice, the One telling you what to wear.

You share with others sitting in your circle, “I don’t know who is supposed to see this shirt. God told me to wear it today. I assume He wants someone to see it, but I have no idea who.”

Incredulous, the person sitting across from me exclaimed, “Are you kidding me! God’s been telling me I need to work on my story.”

And there you have it. One small way to give a little spiritual shove to someone who needed to get going on something God had given her to do.

God’s resurrection power will do that.

Join the conversation here or on our Facebook page.

 

₁Graham Lotz, Anne. The Daniel Prayer, Prayer That Moves Heaven And Changes Nations. Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2016.