Here at Facets of Faith, we’ve been talking about how God has changed our perspective of ourselves. While our stories are unique, one thing binds us together: God’s redemptive work. He took broken women and created something new, something beautiful. Tracy and Jennifer shared earlier this month so be sure to check them out by clicking on their name. Otherwise, today it’s my turn (Kim) to share.

It was a few days after my oldest daughter married the love of her life. Her wedding was beautiful. Her dress, the ceremony and location, their love. I may be partial but I don’t believe there was ever a more beautiful bride. She experienced a lot of loss growing up, so to see her filled with joy warmed this momma’s heart.

Pictures from the day had started to show up on Facebook and through texts. Stunning pictures of the bride and groom surrounded by their wedding party; magazine-worthy shots of the happy couple; even the storm clouds from that day seemed a magnificent backdrop for their wedding photos.

My heart swelled with joy as I gazed upon each picture until . . .

Joy quickly turned to embarrassment as I stared at the woman standing next to my beautiful daughter in one of those pictures.

Her ill-fitting dress.

Her pudgy arms.

Her plump body.

Shame flooded my face as I realized who I was looking at: me. Scrutinizing what I saw, questions assaulted me. Did I really look like that? That dress? My hair? What was I thinking?

Funny, thinking back I thought I looked nice the day of the wedding. Maybe not as nice as I had several years earlier after losing a significant amount of weight. But since then I had walked through a divorce. Aside from losing my youngest daughter in a house fire, nothing had come so close to completely breaking me. The pounds crept back on as I wrestled to find my identity, my value, even my worth.

Honestly, I felt like an utter failure during that season of my life. Words spoken in anger became the tape I played over and over. I longed to embrace God’s view of me, to believe what He said, but all I could see was where I’d failed.

And now it felt as if the picture displayed every flaw I held. A chorus of condemnation rang in my head.

Mirror, Mirror, what do you see?
I see a middle-aged, overweight woman looking at me.

Mirror, Mirror, what do you see?
I see a broken, unrepairable woman looking at me.

Mirror, Mirror, what do you see?
I see shame & grief & sorrow looking at me.

Tears flowed as I continued to look at that picture. Until slowly, another voice joined in. At first, the words were but a whisper.

You are treasured.

You are fearfully and wonderfully made.

The whispers grew louder, stronger.

You are loved.

You are mine.

So now there is no condemnation for those who belong to Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1, NLT

You see pudgy arms but I see arms that have wrapped your children in love.

You see an ill-fitting dress but I see a woman draped in My glory.

You see a plumb body but I see a woman pursuing Me, fear-filled broken heart and all.

Gradually, the truth of God’s Word gently washed over me, shifting my gaze from my physical body to what He had been cultivating in my heart. Healing work. Holy work. Redeeming work.

The Lord doesn’t see things the way you see them. People judge by outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7, NLT

I took a deep breath and looked at another picture. I remember the moment this one was snapped: it was just before the ceremony began and I stood in front of my daughter with my arms wide. She held tightly to my hands as the reality of the marriage commitment dawned in her eyes. I stood there, ready to embrace her, to try and bear some of the weight of her struggle. Instead, I watched my daughter stand firm while she learned to find her own balance.

As I took in the tender moment captured in print, I realized the size of my triceps no longer mattered, nor did the fit of my dress, or the shape of my body. She mattered, my sweet girl who had endured so much. We mattered, the sorrow we survived and the joy we welcomed together. I mattered. Not because of my physical appearance but because I was made in His image, and I am His.

And so are you.

I am overwhelmed with joy in the Lord my God! For he has dressed me with the clothing of salvation and draped me in a robe of righteousness. I am like a bridegroom dressed for his wedding or a bride with her jewels.” Isaiah 61:10, NLT

What do you struggle to believe about yourself? Are you willing to allow God’s truth change your perspective?